Hey - trying not just to lurk

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Hi yes, i have been lurking/going through many many posts in the past few days. i feel i can really relate with people on here, so i decided to join. and hopefully i will be posting more and not just lurking which seems to be my favorite thing to do on websites.

i will try not to go into too much detail about myself right now, but i will post a few things.

i am very stuck in life, have been since graduating high school. i try, but it seems like everyday life is more overwhelming for myself than others. sometimes i wonder if it's all just in my head. a lot of my time is taken up by trying to seem 'normal' when i am forced to go out of the house, it makes me very tired. i tried going to community college which didn't work out, but i do have a job on the weekends. i am 21 and still live at home. no friends, never dated/have no interest in that.

i never thought my low social skills were at all related to my seemingly low...life skills? but recently reading about autism/asperger's feels like filling in the blanks. when i was younger, everyone was very sure my little brother had autism, but my dad didn't want him tested because "I was just like him when I was young and I grew up fine!" pretty positive my father is on the spectrum as well.

things therapists have told me i have: GAD, social anxiety, agoraphobia, depression. whether or not i am on the spectrum, i will probably be seeking professional help (again!! !) soon as i am just so tired of doing the same unproductive things everyday. or at least i would like to, but trying to find someone to go to, and the whole process of making appointments, etc. seems almost impossible for me. in the meantime, i am trying to simplify my life in every department, i'm thinking this will help me cope with day to day life.

it took me a while to write this but i hope uh, maybe i can find some answers or something! turning my thoughts into words is difficult for me so if something i say doesn't seem to make sense i'm sorry.

you are making perfect sense. best wishes to you.

Do you have a special interest?

Welcome!

at the moment, i do not think so. i have in the past though, elementary = bats, middle school = neopets, high school = don't really remember too much of high school. i suppose you could say my special interest are video games now, though every few months i will cycle to a new one. i'm not sure if that would be considered just something i'm interested in or special interest though.

thank you for the welcomes

Welcome to wp.

Well... hello there, and please forgive me in advance for being me. You can tell me anything, however you may not get the reply you are looking for.

Welcome to Wrong Planet!

I can relate. I have lurked myself on this site. I didn't want to be an "imposter".

Cheers!