changing schools and coming out as agender

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For starters, when I was a little kid, I was 100% sure to be trans-masculine, but once I got older, I realized that I am my own gender. I am most comfortable around males, and I'm generally very uncomfortable around females. There are two or three girls that I have known that I am comfortable around, however. I am androphilic-saphiosexual, and I am more male personality-wise than female, but I am also somewhat female, as I am agender, not male or female. For the first time, I am moving away to a new school, and this could be my chance to change my image to what I want people to see me as. I'm tired of being seen as a girl. People who know me see me as certainly a different kind of girl and treat me a little differently, but I just want to be recognized as my own gender like I am meant to be. Right now, I look like a girl that dresses as a boy. At the end of the month, I'm going to cut my hair short so that I'm viewed slightly less feminine, because I appear more feminine than masculine, which I don't fully worry about for myself, but I worry about it for others, because then it leads them to assume things that I don't want them to assume. I'm thinking of changing my name to Finley when I move away, because it's a gender-neutral name that I really like. My only worry is having to tell my family this. I may just have my family call me my birthname, and everyone else call me Finley. The other thing that I want is for people to use gender-neutral pronouns. I'm upset just thinking about this part, because I'm afraid that it will be too difficult for people, and they will forget or refuse to do it. Also, telling my teachers to do it will be hard too, and then they may talk to my family about it, and then I have to explain it to them, and they may not take it seriously. I'm not sure if I really care if people call me he, she, or ze in purpose of the word itself. What I don't like is that if they call me she, they will see me as she. I have one chance in a year from now to make this change- to come out. I don't know how I will do it. My teachers will call me she; I just know it. Everyone will. Only friends I make may call me ze instead, and that will only be a few people. I'm really anxious about this, but I really want to do it, because I have to start somewhere. I just wish that it would be more commonly known and accepted to say things like "ze did this" and "it's for zir" and "that is Mx. Finley." The appearance change won't be a problem. I don't know how I'm going to get through with doing the rest. I just wish that it would be more well known so that this would be easier.. How do I do it?

edit: I just want to add that I just love WP, because anywhere else I post, I mostly only ever get a bunch of rude responses pertaining to a detail I included that isn't even part of the question..

Thank you for sharing your thoughts. And yes WP is a very welcoming and supportive place

but I don't know how I'm going to do it

Express yourself in whatever ways make you feel comfortable, including appearance and personality.

At your new school do not worry about gender conformity and do not let others push it onto you.

You may be seen as 'strange' and 'a weirdo' to some, but to others you can come across as a kind and unique person, as long as you go to your new school with an open, optimistic mindest.

Now, with the name you can easily convince classmates and teachers to give you a nickname. Many schools do this for convenience.

The gender pronouns are a bigger issue though. It is very ingrained that people use the gender pronouns they are use to. Other than putting up with it until high school is over, I'm not sure what you could do about that one. Sorry.

So, do you think that through high school I should just use the "she" pronoun, and then once I go to college maybe try changing pronouns? I have to change sometime. I just don't know when or how.

Sorry to say this: it would be much easier if you went by the "she" pronoun in high school.

Most high schools, most administrators, most high school students are not progressive in this way. They think purely in terms of GENDER.

Hi Finley, I can very much relate to your situation, as I never developed any gender identification myself, but only found out quite recently
that I'm gender neutral and asexual. ( I also didn't know that I'm autistic until 2 years ago). So I simply grew up as a tom-boy kind of girl
and people found that easy to accept, because it's something they were already familiar with.
But I hated it when others, especially the boys, were trying to force a female identity on me.
What I'm a little bit concerned about is that you could turn yourself into a target that bullies find inviting to pick on.
In schools there are always some people with narcissistic personality disorder present somewhere, who enjoy harassing anyone who is different.
But you sound like a strong and confident person, ( I was more inclined to avoid conflict at all cost and so for a long time I wasn't strong
enough to discourage such individuals from bullying me, until I learned to fight back.)
Now I find the best way to cope with intolerant people is not to care about their unqualified opinions at all, never to take anything they do or say personal,
because I accept that their intellectual/emotional capacity to understand anything that is different from the neuro-typical norm would be very limited at best.
So the less I get offended by their behavior, the less I'm suffering from it.
Only the select few who do understand and appreciate your unique personality are worth caring about.
(If you have any mystical inclinations, you could one day dis-identify yourself from the physical human form altogether,
which I find a very exciting thing to consider.)

My friend actually identifies as elvish, and she's obsessed with LOTR. She says that I'm not human and should identify as something else.

That is a really beautiful idea! Elves are a very mysterious species.
As a lucid dreamer I feel much more comfortable navigating the dream world as a fluid energy being.
But unfortunately I lack the concentration to become more accomplished in such ventures and also coping with
physical existence takes up all of my attention and energy most of the time.
Returning to physical perception is like putting on a pair of heavy gumboots with lots of clay stuck to them.
Others have described it to be like squeezing a rainbow into a coke bottle.