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Halfmadgenius
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30 Sep 2014, 7:24 am

Does anyone know how to meet men in a smaller town? The online sites aren't working. Also is anyone using a paid dating site? Are they better than free sites?



Dantac
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30 Sep 2014, 11:20 am

Paid sites are the same thing as free ones. The only difference is you either are allowed to send someone else mail or if the site allows people to contact each other at no cost, they will simply charge you for the accessibility to find or see who has seen / liked you (but did not message you). There's always a catch.

In smaller towns I would guess maybe join volunteer programs that gives you the chance to mingle? Clubs maybe? Sports? Maybe you can get a part time job in a high visibility position (ticket sales at theater, waitressing, etc) where guys can get the chance to ask you out, etc?



Cafeaulait
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30 Sep 2014, 12:29 pm

I live in a smaller town with about a 120.000 inhabitants. Moved there when I was 19. I am a student though, so getting into contact with others is quite a lot easier for me.
How I meet people (and thus guys) in my town:
-sports. I take salsa and kizomba classes. In salsa there are a few more women, in kizomba a few more men. Overall I think it's a good way to meet men
-courses and study. I met people at language courses and psychology courses
-festivities and workshops!
-through friends



Halfmadgenius
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30 Sep 2014, 6:16 pm

There are no clubs in Dalton, I've looked. If I can find a job in Ellijay and move home I'll see about joining the bee keeper club. I don't have bees but I like them. I really want a hive someday. Other than that I don't know what to do. I don't have any friends and men won't approach me when I am out and about.



Stargazer43
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30 Sep 2014, 6:28 pm

Halfmadgenius wrote:
There are no clubs in Dalton, I've looked. If I can find a job in Ellijay and move home I'll see about joining the bee keeper club. I don't have bees but I like them. I really want a hive someday. Other than that I don't know what to do. I don't have any friends and men won't approach me when I am out and about.


If that's where you live, try to find some activities in Chattanooga - either clubs, interest groups, or even meetup groups. With the online sites, maybe try re-writing your profile, getting better pictures, or expanding your search radius.



Halfmadgenius
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30 Sep 2014, 6:54 pm

Stargazer43 wrote:
Halfmadgenius wrote:
There are no clubs in Dalton, I've looked. If I can find a job in Ellijay and move home I'll see about joining the bee keeper club. I don't have bees but I like them. I really want a hive someday. Other than that I don't know what to do. I don't have any friends and men won't approach me when I am out and about.


If that's where you live, try to find some activities in Chattanooga - either clubs, interest groups, or even meetup groups. With the online sites, maybe try re-writing your profile, getting better pictures, or expanding your search radius.


I'd love to go to Chattanooga, problem is I haven't had a car for 3 years. :(



yellowtamarin
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30 Sep 2014, 9:23 pm

I live in a town of ~10,000. I date in my capital city instead, and hope that they are cool with a semi-LDR (as it's a few hundred kms away and I only visit every 2-3 weeks).

But if you are determined to/have to date within your town, and there are no clubs, I think you will struggle. You'll just have to randomly bump into someone. Maybe at work? At the library? Surely there's a sports group? I meet people at my squash club, haven't met a suitable person to date but it's not impossible.

If men won't approach you, you will have to approach them.



Halfmadgenius
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30 Sep 2014, 10:56 pm

You can't really get to know a person dating long distance. Certainly not good enough to marry, I tried that once.

During our weekly dates the guy i dated was able to pretend to be a good person. I wasn't able to spend enough time with him to see his dark side. Once he got me away from my mom, away from my job, home, and independence, that's when I learned who he really was.

I need someone close enough that I can spend time with them in person. I'd never feel comfortable in a relationship where I never know where he is really at, who he is really with, and what he is really doing. How can you trust someone who you barely know and how do you get to know them if you don't get to spend time with them? They can be whoever they want on the internet.

Long distance would be pointless. I could never marry a man I didn't trust and could never again trust a man I don't know. And if I am not going to marry him why bother dating?