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kornik
Tufted Titmouse
Joined: May 26, 2007
Posts: 47
Location: UK
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 Posted: Tue Jun 05, 2007 3:08 am Post subject: Pre-Job Analysis |
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From my perspective I can't emphasise how important this point is.
The work difficulties that I have experienced have often been from moving into an environment that was totally unsuitable for me. In the majority of cases it occured before I found out about my AS which made them , with hindsight, unforeseeable, but for someone who knows about their AS a lot of the problems can be mitigated.
Prior research into things like the culture of the firm, its track record (to identify if it is volatile), senior management, can all help identify if it is likely to be an aggressive environment or one that is subject to high levels of change.
Other simple things like finding out if you will be working in an open plan setting or studying exactly what the job tasks are to see if work overload or work that is outside of existing personal capabilities can all also help.
Now I never jump into a job before considering these type of factors carefully no matter how atttractive a role may initially appear.
| candid89 wrote: | I've found that at least "researching" a job is a great way to start.
I hope you're all wondering why I put "researching" in quotations.
If you're applying for a gift shop job....wander around the store before applying, or the interview, see where things are, see what kinds of products (brand names, etc.) they carry. I know I'm not the only one (with Asp) that is observant.
If you're applying for an office-type job...go online, google, yahoo, msn, and ask.com the company, or even the position within the company. Don't just rely on the company's own website for information.
If you're applying for some other kind of job...it helps to not necessarily ask friends and family about the business, (because they might not approve of the job, or they might "know someone" and try and help...and THAT ususally doesn't turn out too well), but ask the waitress down the street...people from the business probably eat there once in a while...OR the convienence store clerk...ask them about the business and the employees...
Research is a very important part of looking for a job. Of course, don't let on to these people (waitress/clerk, etc.) you're asking, that you're looking to get employment at these places. They might have opinions that they share with your prospective employer that may HINDER your chances.
This way, you may find out more than you wanted, but you'll be much more informed than just walking in at 10 am for your interview with no information at all!
Jen
p.s. I've pretty much had one job per year. I thought it was just me...and I get tired of the same work environment so I have to move on (my choice). MAYBE, it's the Asp part of me. Who knows? |
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Benu
Tufted Titmouse
Joined: Oct 17, 2006
Posts: 40
Location: Houston Texas coast
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| Posted: Tue Jun 05, 2007 8:57 am Post subject: Re: fear of applying for jobs |
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| fonz wrote: | | Hi. I'm a student at West Chester University in Pennsylvania and I am home for the summer and I need to find a job, but I don't know what I should do or how to go about doing that. I'm confused on where I should be working and I've never done this before and I'm afraid of rejection and having no money. Did anyone else go through this before? |
In what follows I'm not intending to make fun of you or put you down.
Yes, you are not alone. Many of us have experienced your insecurities. Keep trying to figure it out and you will prevail.
You're an aspie so be brave and use your individualism (if you are an aspie and if that is how you are-since aspiesm is a spectrum disorder) to get over your fear of rejection. Just because many people are accepted doesn't mean they are happy or doing the "right" thing. Going with the crowd is necessarily an NT thing not an aspie thing (we are each unique) and doesn't mean the majority is right (they're just powerful). Remember that a job or work is just that. Don't take it to personal if you fail or get fired. Pick yourself up and keep trying.
Having no money is a drag in the modern world. Think of how to do more things on the cheap or free and that will help take the edge off of being poor. Just realize that getting a job will not do much to help your no money situation considering how much you will likely not be paid. Money makes us comfortable and makes many things easier.
Follow your interests as to where you should work. Think about what are you interested in or what you like doing. Then figure out what type of jobs incorporate that. ie.: if you like working with your hands and outdoors think about construction or landscaping. If you really, really like lots of money think about sales jobs which pay commissions. If you like sex and having lots of money then work as a prostitute or porn movie actor. If you like to be lazy and do little and earn little money get a job doing that.
Do remember that what ever you do you will not earn much money since you are unskilled. Since you will be spending a lot of time at whatever you will be doing and you will probably not be paid enough to do something you don't like then you might as well do something you like doing.
Like you I'm confused as to where I'm supposed to be working. I got a job washing dishes at 14 for a year and have never had a regular job since. Finding a regular job seemed intimidating to me. I don't know how to get a job either so I work for myself. I have always created my own businesses. When I was in 5th and 6th grade I started being an entrepreneur. At school I would take orders and collect the money with a slight markup for sweet tarts and jaw breakers. Then after school I would walk the mile or so to the nearest mall and buy the inventory. Since nobody else would walk up to the mall and their parents bought the candy for them they didn't know what the prices were. The next day after delivering everybodys candy I'd have some change and candy for myself. From that I learned that honesty and dependability were bankable. Being trust worthy is a valuable trait. As an adult I understand that having self respect is something no one can take away from me, only i can destroy it. When I was in junior high I mowed lawns and sold cool posters directly to my friends. In high school I sold drugs (I can say this because the statue of limitations passed long ago before you were born) which was a bad implementation of good business models. I would recommend not doing that.
I don't work well directly interacting each moment with someone in my face, telling me what to do each moment or having to continually direct anyone else's details. I don't mind teaching people but don't want to hand hold forever on the same thing. So I like custom work that allows me to either work independent or with other professionals who know what they are doing. I can work with a team only if all members can preform their parts.
Find something interesting. Good luck. Life is what we do until we die so follow your interests unless your being paid a lot of money to compensate.
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girl7000
Majestic Eagle Owl
Joined: Mar 11, 2007
Posts: 1263
Location: Somewhere in the Atlantic
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| Posted: Thu Jun 14, 2007 10:07 am Post subject: |
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Part of the problem is that some organisations / managers / interviewers take 'personality' into account too much. They forget that they are employing you to do a job, not to be their new best friend.
I once had my contract stopped by an employer because although they kept telling me that the quality of my work was really good, and also demonstrated this by their actions (asking me to train and help others etc.) they just couldn't cope with having someone who was 'different' in the office.
A friend of mine who was quite senior there says that part of the problem was that I didn't go drinking with everyone after work - but that was not my job and if you have AS surely it is perfectly understandable that you don't want to go to a noisy, smelly pub. And I can't drink anyway because of meds.
I also had another job offer withdrawn when they found out I had AS. They said it was like a family there so someone who kept to themselves wouldn't fit in. But they have hundreds of employees - so it can't be that much like a family and I don't see how it would affect them if I'm not socialising with them.
It has also affected my work choices. I am interested in music and this is what I have studied at uni, but because music work is obtained mainly by 'networking' and getting 'contacts', someone like me is pretty much excluded from this.
On the positive side, I did email a music recruitment organisation about this and they did seem to take my views seriously and may be setting up a more 'formal' networking event (other than the standard 'lets all go to a pub / club and get drunk and take drugs') which would be good.
I think personal qualities are important: honesty, commitment, reliability, genuine interest, intelligence etc. but not your personality itself. Someone might be considered 'boring' or a little 'different' or 'quirky' but if they are great at the job, why does this matter? |
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kornik
Tufted Titmouse
Joined: May 26, 2007
Posts: 47
Location: UK
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| Posted: Fri Jun 15, 2007 3:22 am Post subject: Work Socialisation |
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I am not sure where you are posting from but in the UK at least I think you would have a legal case against your company.
If you are doing a job well "technically" then, unless you are offending people or doing something serious inter-personally (which it doesn't sound that you are) then the reasons you give are no grounds for dismissal.
Againts that I don't think that formal recourse is ultimately beneficial; it is distracting and emotionally draining.
I hear what you say about socialising afetr work and appreciate the AS relates issues - noise, crowded spaces etc but socialising outside of formal work commitments is something that I have come to appreciate is hugely beneficial.
It helps overcome the criticisms you mention and enables others to get to know you some more. I have found this means people understand - or don't misunderstand - me better.
Once people come to do this I have found that they are more likely to assist and support you in the workplace.
I used to avoid all social contact outside of work and couldn't understand why my boss would ask i participated. I now though make it one of my key work priorities!
Kornik
| girl7000 wrote: | Part of the problem is that some organisations / managers / interviewers take 'personality' into account too much. They forget that they are employing you to do a job, not to be their new best friend.
I once had my contract stopped by an employer because although they kept telling me that the quality of my work was really good, and also demonstrated this by their actions (asking me to train and help others etc.) they just couldn't cope with having someone who was 'different' in the office.
A friend of mine who was quite senior there says that part of the problem was that I didn't go drinking with everyone after work - but that was not my job and if you have AS surely it is perfectly understandable that you don't want to go to a noisy, smelly pub. And I can't drink anyway because of meds.
I also had another job offer withdrawn when they found out I had AS. They said it was like a family there so someone who kept to themselves wouldn't fit in. But they have hundreds of employees - so it can't be that much like a family and I don't see how it would affect them if I'm not socialising with them.
It has also affected my work choices. I am interested in music and this is what I have studied at uni, but because music work is obtained mainly by 'networking' and getting 'contacts', someone like me is pretty much excluded from this.
On the positive side, I did email a music recruitment organisation about this and they did seem to take my views seriously and may be setting up a more 'formal' networking event (other than the standard 'lets all go to a pub / club and get drunk and take drugs') which would be good.
I think personal qualities are important: honesty, commitment, reliability, genuine interest, intelligence etc. but not your personality itself. Someone might be considered 'boring' or a little 'different' or 'quirky' but if they are great at the job, why does this matter? |
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Greentea
Bull in China Shop par Excellence!
Joined: Jun 15, 2007
Posts: 2557
Location: Middle East
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| Posted: Fri Jun 15, 2007 5:32 pm Post subject: |
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| I'm always so ashamed around people because I'm so often fired. The reason I'm fired is I speak my mind a bit too much and don't fit in, as so many have said here. I'm now unemployed again and feel desperate. I was never able to get any promotions or pay raises because of my personality. |
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Pandora
Cat Lady
Joined: Jun 18, 2005
Age: 47
Posts: 4684
Location: Townsville
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| Posted: Sat Jun 30, 2007 8:36 am Post subject: |
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Kornik, what about those of us who see enough of our workmates at work and would like to keep our work and home lives mostly separate? I'm quite happy to participate in work functions such as morning teas and team lunches but that's usually about it.
_________________
Break out you Western girls,
Someday soon you're gonna rule the world.
Break out you Western girls,
Hold your heads up high.
"Western Girls" - Dragon
I am banned  |
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Asby
Snowy Owl
Joined: Jul 24, 2007
Posts: 128
Location: Swindon, england
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| Posted: Sat Aug 04, 2007 10:10 am Post subject: |
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In my experience (from news stories and stuff) mentining AS decreases your chance with certain employers and also just try your best to do EXACTLY what your employer tells you to do or they will sack you on the spot.
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I Love pizza!! |
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Pandora
Cat Lady
Joined: Jun 18, 2005
Age: 47
Posts: 4684
Location: Townsville
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| Posted: Sat Aug 11, 2007 1:44 am Post subject: |
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I won't do something that I consider unethical but would volunteer to do a different job instead to make up for it.
_________________
Break out you Western girls,
Someday soon you're gonna rule the world.
Break out you Western girls,
Hold your heads up high.
"Western Girls" - Dragon
I am banned |
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thx1138
Butterfly
Joined: Jul 23, 2007
Posts: 12
Location: Escondido, CA
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| Posted: Sun Aug 19, 2007 12:14 am Post subject: Some "unofficial" job tips |
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I posted this on another board, I thought it might come in handy here. Enjoy!
1.) Make a note of who introduces themsevles to you when you first start. I can tell you for a fact that the first seemingly super friendly coworkers who want to be the first to get to know you are also, sadly, often the first to stab you in the back and can be the meanest if you do not measure up to their often unrealistic social expectations of you.
2.) Treat everyone like they are your friend, even if you hate their guts (i.e., keep your friends close and your enemies closer).
3.) Don't trust anyone. It seems over protective, but it is a good rule of thumb. I have had people I could have sworn would keep a secret spill the beans (often in front of as many people as possible).
4.) Filter your emails. One thing about emails is that they are basically written in stone, they can be sent to anyone. So when sending a email, be as non-offensive and as bland as possible. I even sent a personal email to someone who didn't work at my company complaining about my boss. Somehow, the boss was able to obtain a copy.
5.) Try to avoid office conversations. With aspies (myself included) we are not experts at social interaction in the office. I have found that being polite and terminating a conversation as soon as possible has saved me a number of times. Basically, just pretend you are listing to what they are saying, look like your interested and then say something like "Can I go for a quick second. My lunch is in the microwave". Saying quick second is great because they take it as your going to come back (they are so interested in their own words they won't notice if you return or not), so you can use it as an easy exit.
6.) Be an actor. The non-aspie person prides themselves on how shallow they can be (i.e., why do you think Paris Hilton is a role model for so many of them). It really works, I tend to be really outgoing at work because I put myself in the mental role of "people person". In fact, most people at work I really don't like, but they think I like them. |
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Greentea
Bull in China Shop par Excellence!
Joined: Jun 15, 2007
Posts: 2557
Location: Middle East
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| Posted: Mon Aug 20, 2007 2:07 pm Post subject: |
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You are soooo right about each and every one of your points here.
I wish you'd told me all this 20 years ago. My life would've been completely different, not the hell it's been at work and socially.
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"It is the wounded oyster that mends its shell with pearl" - Ralph Waldo Emerson |
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Brian003
Velociraptor
Joined: Sep 11, 2007
Posts: 401
Location: University of Michigan Ann Arbor
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| Posted: Tue Sep 11, 2007 11:49 pm Post subject: Re: ... |
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| nerderer wrote: | | you have to be good looking and a jerk if your both all the better and nobody likes a know it all. |
I get an A+! |
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TrueDave
is learning the hard way.
Joined: Jul 28, 2007
Posts: 1062
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| Posted: Mon Sep 17, 2007 1:08 am Post subject: |
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It got so bad with me being let go I eventually just quit asking why.
My b est work experience was still tough. I wouldn't have lasted as long were it not that I got along so well with our customers, some of whom I still keep in touch with. My co workers, nothing.
I had a problem with the team player thing. Then I thought of Star Trek. Everybody there is a specialist, but has some general knowledge. It's important to know just where you fit in.
Also acknowledge your speciality, what you're best at.
You know what Dr McKoy would say if his boss would ask him to do something complicated outside medicine . . . . |
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Greentea
Bull in China Shop par Excellence!
Joined: Jun 15, 2007
Posts: 2557
Location: Middle East
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| Posted: Mon Sep 17, 2007 1:30 am Post subject: |
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| TrueDave wrote: | | My b est work experience was still tough. I wouldn't have lasted as long were it not that I got along so well with our customers, some of whom I still keep in touch with. |
I could've written that, word by word. I've always been puzzled why I get along so well with the customers and so badly with everyone else in the company.
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"It is the wounded oyster that mends its shell with pearl" - Ralph Waldo Emerson |
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sassyaspie
Blue Jay
Joined: Sep 21, 2007
Posts: 84
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| Posted: Tue Sep 25, 2007 7:29 am Post subject: |
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Hi all,
Thanks for all the advice, I find some very useful, hoping I will be able to apply them to my current job.
xcuse me, thx1138, i also like paris a little bit. her clip "stars are blind" looks good and the tune is really catchy. in addition, she was like a modern princess, born with a silver spoon in her mouth. don't you love fairy tales?!?! LOL 
cheers,
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i'm no longer scared now that i've found you |
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WildMonkey
Tufted Titmouse
Joined: Sep 25, 2007
Posts: 40
Location: England Plymouth
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| Posted: Tue Oct 02, 2007 6:01 pm Post subject: |
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I feel really bad admitting that have been unemployed for most of my life now 37yr that equates to 2 jobs in 19yrs total time in both jobs 2 yrs = 17yrs of unemployment.
My main problem was being scared to interact with the rest of the world, just hid myself away indoors being mostly mute.
The ideal of having to go to a job interview made me sick Ive recieved no help from anyone not even my family, all I wanted to do was die also the kind of jobs that I could get would make me even more depressed my last job almost killed me.
I feel such a waste of space an a tax burden to the people that can work, but since joining this site an seeing my shrink Im hoping to turn my life around an actually live it.
Thanks for the all info here will try to make good use of it an get a darn job.
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Life sucks where is the reset button. |
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