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| Do you wear a mask in public? |
| Yes |
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81% |
[ 50 ] |
| No |
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18% |
[ 11 ] |
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| Total Votes : 61 |
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Beenthere
10 Miles South of Sanity
Joined: Dec 30, 2005
Age: 41
Posts: 2121
Location: Pa.
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 Posted: Sun Sep 02, 2007 4:15 pm Post subject: |
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Merle...love your poem. Keep writing. 
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*Normal* is just a setting on the dryer. |
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wsmac
WP Elevator Operator - What Floor Please?
Joined: Sep 01, 2007
Posts: 2787
Location: Humboldt County, Little Blue House on the Corner
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| Posted: Mon Sep 10, 2007 5:26 am Post subject: |
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I enjoyed that poem also.
I have worn a couple of masks.
The one I started wearing first was that of a clown.
Whenever I forgot something, tripped up or bumped into things, whenever I felt like jumping around, or I was late to things, I could act up as a clown and everyone figured I did these things on purpose.
I think that early on, I realized that being seen as 'being in control' was good, but 'being out of control' was bad.
If 'they' knew I could not control certain things about my behavior, then I would be bad.
If 'they' thought I was just clowning around, they could laugh and applaud me (attention), or just tell me that I had to straighten up.
Eventually I got to be known as reckless, daring, a rebel (my mom used that one a lot), and people would stop trying to correct me.
In a way, I created a persona through which I could gain everyone's acceptance, even if it was for the wrong reasons.
Later in my adult life, I found my second mask.
I had the ability to grow a very full beard. With the beard, several things changed in my life.
Many people would avoid me if I furrowed my brow, rode my harley, stuff like that. This gave me privacy.
I'm told my eyes are quite expressive. I suppose that helped to make some folks see me as the big old lumbering bearded guy whose goofiness was attractive, again, in a clownish sort of way.
Being big, bearded and gregarious, I became a sort of friendly giant to some.
I have kept the beard off for a couple of years now... pretty much. Don't know if I'll ever grow it back, although I HATE shaving! |
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fathom73
Tufted Titmouse
Joined: Sep 04, 2007
Posts: 43
Location: MOB
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| Posted: Mon Sep 24, 2007 11:30 pm Post subject: |
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I just try to be invisible and blend in with society. The mask I wear is one who is quiet. I am really talkative, but no one wants to talk about the things I'm into. I can't tell jokes, because I don't know if people will get my sense of humor. No one seems to.
I want a diagnosis, so that I can reveal to everyone who's under the mask. Maybe then I can be more like myself and I won't spend all day under the EXTREME stress of trying to look normal. |
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Arbie
Educated Stupid
Joined: Mar 23, 2007
Age: 27
Posts: 1747
Location: Near Greenville S.C.
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| Posted: Tue Sep 25, 2007 12:03 am Post subject: |
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| Absolutely. To hide the fact that I am a sociable, charismatic, charming and intelligent individual, I pretend to be a socially inept, awkward and strange goofball when ever I am in public. That'll show them. |
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Toad
Emu Egg
Joined: Oct 02, 2007
Posts: 8
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| Posted: Tue Oct 02, 2007 5:10 am Post subject: |
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| wsmac wrote: | I enjoyed that poem also.
...
I have kept the beard off for a couple of years now... pretty much. Don't know if I'll ever grow it back, although I HATE shaving! |
http://www.badgerandblade.com/ is an excellent resource for shaving- you may be able to find something to make shaving more bearable. (I actually find it a pleasant experience now.) |
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thyme
Phoenix
Joined: Aug 06, 2007
Posts: 799
Location: Over the Hills and Far Away
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| Posted: Wed Oct 03, 2007 5:05 pm Post subject: |
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| Arbie wrote: | | Absolutely. To hide the fact that I am a sociable, charismatic, charming and intelligent individual, I pretend to be a socially inept, awkward and strange goofball when ever I am in public. That'll show them. |
 yes me too! |
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Prof_Pretorius
troubled Soul
Joined: Aug 21, 2006
Age: 50
Posts: 4939
Location: Hiding in the attic of the Arkham Library
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| Posted: Wed Oct 03, 2007 5:29 pm Post subject: |
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Absolutely lovely poem, Merle.
(By the way, is that you?)
Here's a favorite song by Roger Waters: Paranoid Eyes
button your lip don't let the shield slip
take a fresh grip on your bullet proof mask
and if they try to break down your disguise with their questions
you can hide hide hide
behind paranoid eyes
you put on your brave face and slip over the road for a jar
fixing your grin as you casually lean on the bar
laughing too loud at the rest of the world
with the boys in the crowd
you hide hide hide
behind petrified eyes
you believed in their stories of fame fortune and glory
now you're lost in a haze of alcohol soft middle age
the pie in the sky turned out to be miles too high
and you hide hide hide
behind brown and mild eyes
(Almost makes you think he might be ASpie, eh?)
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I wake to sleep, and take my waking slow. I feel my fate in what I cannot fear. I learn by going where I have to go. ~Theodore Roethke |
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Rynessa
Deinonychus
Joined: Oct 02, 2007
Posts: 324
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| Posted: Fri Oct 05, 2007 11:57 am Post subject: |
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Interesting that an Aspie writing a poem for fun writes much better
than many NTs who consider themselves "poets" and put on airs |
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Saerain
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker
Joined: Jun 22, 2007
Age: 22
Posts: 62
Location: Massachusetts, United States of Canada
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| Posted: Mon Oct 15, 2007 5:40 am Post subject: |
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The personality of any given human is too complex for anyone to not refocus their lens for the given situation.
So, assuming by 'wearing a mask' you mean outright misrepresenting myself, then no.
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'I don't know if that's an Asperger's thing or not, I think it's just being reasonable.' - Bram Cohen |
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mechanima
Deinonychus
Joined: Nov 09, 2005
Posts: 369
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| Posted: Tue Oct 16, 2007 10:08 am Post subject: |
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I do not actually think "me" HAS an interactive form.
I lately realised that most of my social life has consisted of dancing and sex, largely because I can relax while doing either, or even BOTH (as some have claimed after seeing me get a BIT carried away) without the stress of any kind of "performance".
I don't pretend or hide, it's more like choosing the right clothes to wear.
I choose a persona that will ideally assert "me" best, and most honestly, in the situation I am about to enter, but will, at least, be able to survive it unscathed. 
I am usually close to "word perfect" in terms of fitting the situation, but superficial, and CLUELESS as to how to assert my actual wants and needs through the medium of the essential mask.
I think a lot of us are like that.
M |
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poopylungstuffing
"Ultimate Creative Oddball"
Joined: Mar 09, 2007
Age: 33
Posts: 4245
Location: not otherwise specified
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| Posted: Wed Oct 17, 2007 11:03 pm Post subject: |
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I wore a big rubber cat mask into a resturaunt once.
It made it very hard to eat.
(As far as the other kind of mask, I have never been very good at that)
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"If the fool would persist in his folly, he would become wise" -William Blake |
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Lyetta
Tufted Titmouse
Joined: Apr 16, 2007
Posts: 41
Location: Holyoke, Massachusetts
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| Posted: Fri Oct 19, 2007 6:52 pm Post subject: mona lisa "half smile" of DBT |
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Dialectical Behavioral THerapy teaches people to have a half smile - just pretend to smile a little and hold it on your face, and people will treat you better. it works. it sucks but it works. i do it all the time to handle the outside world. it makes me look less sad. and more easily ignored. i like to be ignored in social situations
L |
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stevechoi
Raven
Joined: Nov 18, 2007
Age: 34
Posts: 105
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| Posted: Mon Nov 19, 2007 3:25 am Post subject: |
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For me, I wear a mask every day. I like to wear the mask of actors.
I do this because it's easy to memorize their lines, dialogue and actions...and mimic them in similar situations. That's how I've coped with every social interaction in my life thus far.
I think most Aspie's here will agree. |
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