[Advice needed] a friend being used

Wilco · Posted: Mon Jul 06, 2009 3:48 pm Post subject:

I want to help a friend of mine, but I don't know what to do. She has been with this guy for about 8 months, with many good times. But so many more bad times. They broke up a few months ago for the first time. He dumped her. She also found out he had been texting a good friend of hers stuff like 'I want to be with you, you are so much better.'

But they got back together again, and things seemed fine for a while. A few weeks ago he dumped her again, they get back together again, have make up sex, and 5 minutes after she leaves his house he dumps her again. With an email. She was so angry, got into a huge fight with him and now they are close to getting back together again.

He always has a certain excuse for his actions. Some more logical than others. Like saying he broke up with an email because he knew she cut herself and he wanted to make her so angry she would stop. Nobody believes him. Even she has her doubts. But she wants to believe him because she is in love. It's also her first love and she told me she is scared that if she breaks up now she won't ever love anyone again because it took so long for her to find someone she loves.

So to make a long story short, she knows that things aren't as they should be and that she might be used but her love for him and her fear of losing love for ever are stronger than her mind. So I don't know what to do or what to say to her. But it's obvious that she isn't going to change things herself. That and that if she is being used, she will be used for a long time.