jonnysound
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker
Joined: Jan 09, 2011
Age: 25
Posts: 54
Location: Doncaster, England
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 Posted: Sun Jun 05, 2011 5:50 pm Post subject: How many actual friends can you say you've ever had / have? |
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How many actual friends can you say you've ever had / have? since the early days at school?
Just wandering how bad I am then and now at making friends and I never saw them outside school except when I lived with them at University. No need to do a table like me 
years: No. Of friends: When:
1992 - 1999 2 School
1999 - 2005 0. School
2005 - 2007 2. (10 acquaintances) School
2007 - present* 11 (plus about 25 acquaintances). University/End of university/Present*
My 1 best friend is back home now 3963 miles away in Chicago, IL. At the moment everyones gone home so I now see no one. Crap.
_________________
(bluepill)- the blissful ignorance of illusion
(redpill)- embracing the sometimes painful truth of reality
(officially diagnosed with Asperger's 2nd June 2011 @ 12:56pm)
Last edited by jonnysound on Sun Jun 05, 2011 6:19 pm; edited 1 time in total |
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swbluto
System architect and nanobot commander
Joined: Feb 27, 2011
Age: 26
Posts: 2899
Location: In the Andes, counting the stars and wondering if one of them is home to another civilization
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| Posted: Sun Jun 05, 2011 5:55 pm Post subject: Re: How many actual friends can you say you've ever had? |
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| jonnysound wrote: | how many friends you can you have had since the early days at school?
Just wandering how bad I am then and now at making friends and I never saw them outside school except when I lived with them at University. No need to do a table like me
years: No. Of friends: When:
1992 - 1999 2 School
1999 - 2005 0. School
2005 - 2007 2. (10 acquaintances) School
2007 - present* 11 (plus about 25 acquaintances). University/End of university/Present*
My 1 best friend is back home now 3963 miles away in Chicago, IL. At the moment everyones gone home so I now see no one. Crap. |
Elementary school - an average of 2 kids per grade, with only 1 kid some years. None were particularly close, except for in 6th grade.
7th-12th grade - An average of .5 friends each year, with 1 or 2 friends in 10th, 11th and 12th. Many acquaintances, as is usual.
Post-12th grade - No RL friends and two online friends though the relational 'quality' is... significantly less than RL. |
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Jory
Always in the wrong place at the wrong time
Joined: Jun 03, 2011
Age: 29
Posts: 6302
Location: Tornado Alley
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| Posted: Sun Jun 05, 2011 6:00 pm Post subject: |
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| Zero. I've had acquaintances but really no friends. At times in the past, in my childhood and early teen years, I found that I had somehow drifted into a group of friends, but it was usually a situation in which they were the ones who were friends and I was wondering what the hell I was doing there. Back when I actually played video games, gamers in my schools tended to cluster together to play each other's games, and I got in on that, but I'll be damned if I can even tell you one of their names. |
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IdahoRose
Imaginary Friend
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Joined: Feb 25, 2007
Age: 22
Posts: 18651
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| Posted: Sun Jun 05, 2011 6:09 pm Post subject: |
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Elementary school - 6 (not all at once though)
Junior high - 2
Currently - 0 (I'm not counting the ones I talk to on the Internet, and the one friend I do have in real life may as well be zero since she is always way too busy to hang out with me.) |
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Seph
Velociraptor
Joined: May 25, 2011
Posts: 406
Location: In a space station in orbit around Saturn
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| Posted: Sun Jun 05, 2011 6:14 pm Post subject: |
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Elementary school years - 2 that I remember + a gf I remember next to nothing about.
Middle/high school years - I had a gf a few months but other than that 0 real friends. I have siblings that are close age wise and we technically shared friends but looking back it was my brothers that they were friends with. I had someone from those days actually start looking for me over a decade later saying that I was his best friend back then after he found me. Maybe I don't really know what friends are...
College years - 0
Adult years - The years that I do the Christian thing I get a sense of community out of the church and maybe a few friends. The years that I don't, I don't.
_________________
Why oh why didn't I take the BLUE pill? -Cypher, Matrix
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jonnysound
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker
Joined: Jan 09, 2011
Age: 25
Posts: 54
Location: Doncaster, England
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| Posted: Sun Jun 05, 2011 6:15 pm Post subject: |
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Actually thinking about it again I think the friend numbers are bit lower but more like 1 or 2 fairly close ish friends.
And in early years at school they would always get bored of me playing the same game the same way everyday so ended up sitting in a corner at school break time.
Most them are / where about 90% girls! I guess there more tolerable / patient / helpful with me then the male friends making jokes and stuff, as what I've learnt male friends do that to each other even though I really hate it.
Do you ask them if there your friend? I always find myself asking that!
This all got me thinking about my recent diagnosis, yep it's an aspie thing.
_________________
(bluepill)- the blissful ignorance of illusion
(redpill)- embracing the sometimes painful truth of reality
(officially diagnosed with Asperger's 2nd June 2011 @ 12:56pm)
Last edited by jonnysound on Sun Jun 05, 2011 6:24 pm; edited 1 time in total |
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Ambivalence
The Obvious Factor
Joined: Nov 09, 2008
Posts: 3638
Location: Peterlee (for Industry)
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| Posted: Sun Jun 05, 2011 6:16 pm Post subject: |
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Tricky. There's a couple of people I'm on "good friends" terms with (may have screwed up with one though due to misunderstanding last year) but rarely see, that's about it, maybe a half dozen more people I'd be pleased to see again and vice versa; and I'm on reasonable terms with most of the people I work with, but never see them outside work.
There've been times I've thought myself to have been in a circle of friends and it's proved not to be the case; I have a persistent habit of imagining that because I like and respect someone the feeling is mutual. And that other people have sensible perspectives on things. 
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No one has gone missing or died.
The year is still young. |
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CockneyRebel
Mick Avory, Sensitive brown-eyed Sweet Pea
Joined: Jul 18, 2004
Age: 38
Posts: 87192
Location: In a quiet and peaceful garden, where gentle Mick Avory-like Sweet Peas grow.
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jonnysound
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker
Joined: Jan 09, 2011
Age: 25
Posts: 54
Location: Doncaster, England
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| Posted: Sun Jun 05, 2011 6:35 pm Post subject: |
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From a being a little person I was just never that interested in making or playing with friends and when I did I had no idea how and now I'm just terrible.
_________________
(bluepill)- the blissful ignorance of illusion
(redpill)- embracing the sometimes painful truth of reality
(officially diagnosed with Asperger's 2nd June 2011 @ 12:56pm) |
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trappedinhell
Phoenix
Joined: May 15, 2011
Age: 44
Posts: 570
Location: Scotland
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| Posted: Sun Jun 05, 2011 6:43 pm Post subject: |
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on average, during school years:
mutual respect: 5
Got on well, but hardly ever saw outside school: 2
frequently spent time with outside school: 0.6
I remember one "best friend" I was not comfortable with. I went to his house just once. He ended up playing darts and aiming for my leg. Not maliciously, but NTs often have a perverse sense of fun and a limited moral sense in my experience. Maybe aspies do too, but I just have more experience of NTs. |
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Hands
Snowy Owl
Joined: Aug 08, 2008
Age: 22
Posts: 154
Location: UK
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| Posted: Sun Jun 05, 2011 7:20 pm Post subject: |
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Primary school - some acquaintances, 1 person who I thought was my friend but was not and no real friends.
High School - 7, only 1 of those I spent time with outside of school and still talk to now. If teachers count then 11.
College - again some aquaintances but no-one I would consider a friend.
And now, other than a guy I know from school, none.
_________________
The time is NOW-itzki
"Try again, fail again, fail better." - Samuel Beckett.
"If you touch anything on my desk, I will chop off your hands, I'll lock them in the gun safe." - Det. Louis Fitch. |
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jmnixon95
Post-Phoenix
Joined: Dec 27, 2009
Age: 17
Posts: 20902
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| Posted: Sun Jun 05, 2011 7:22 pm Post subject: |
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Two or three.
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Books are a delicacy in Canada. |
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hellomynameis
Tufted Titmouse
Joined: Oct 15, 2010
Age: 16
Posts: 41
Location: Maryland, USA
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| Posted: Sun Jun 05, 2011 9:09 pm Post subject: |
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That really depends on your definition of 'friend'. I have one person in school what I talk with regularly and like to work with in groups. I don't see her outside of school, but I like her as a person, which is a lot for me. I have two 'friends' who come over to my house, but that's more because there aren't really any rules in my house. They pretty much just hang out with each other and ask me for help with homework.
Actually, my closest friend is probably my sister. She's two years younger than me, but she's really good at making me feel 'normal'. She's technically NT, but weird in her own way.
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“Don’t ask what the world needs. Ask what makes you come alive, and go do it. Because what the world needs is people who have come alive.” Howard Thurman
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SammichEater
Now 30% Cooler
Joined: Mar 07, 2011
Age: 19
Posts: 3823
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| Posted: Sun Jun 05, 2011 10:12 pm Post subject: |
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| I've never had more than 3 at a time, and that was back in elementary school. Since then I haven't had more than one at a time, with a large amount of time spent with no friends at all. |
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johnsmcjohn
ad hominem
Joined: Jun 02, 2011
Posts: 1213
Location: Las Vegas
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| Posted: Sun Jun 05, 2011 10:26 pm Post subject: |
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In elementary I had no friends. My family moved about every 6 months or so and as a result, I was never around long enough to make friends. My parents friends had a few kids my age, but while I was around them, I never considered them to be my friends.
In jr. high I had one friend. He lived right down the street from me so I think he was my friend more for convenience than shared interest. We had virtually nothing in common.
High school I was still friends with my jr. high friend but we drifted apart as we came to realize we were too different.
College: no friends.
Today: no friends. And I'm ok with that. I really have no desire to make any friends.
_________________
Your Aspie score: 181 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 30 of 200
You are very likely an Aspie
Myers-Briggs: INTJ
AQ: 44 |
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