rabbittss
Phoenix
Joined: Dec 30, 2011
Posts: 1348
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 Posted: Thu May 10, 2012 10:56 pm Post subject: |
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| pants which require cornstarch to put on should also be destroyed. |
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Ancalagon
Computer Geek
Joined: Dec 26, 2007
Posts: 2387
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| Posted: Thu May 10, 2012 11:49 pm Post subject: |
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| DogsWithoutHorses wrote: | | Ancalagon wrote: | | Butts do have the advantage of not being located in front, directly beneath the face in the same distracting way that boobs are. |
You're gonna have to get over that. |
Get over what?
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DogsWithoutHorses
mockingbyrd
Joined: Apr 06, 2012
Posts: 1145
Location: New York
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| Posted: Thu May 10, 2012 11:54 pm Post subject: |
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| Ancalagon wrote: | | DogsWithoutHorses wrote: | | Ancalagon wrote: | | Butts do have the advantage of not being located in front, directly beneath the face in the same distracting way that boobs are. |
You're gonna have to get over that. |
Get over what? |
"getting distracted" or whatever
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GoatOnFire
Greatest Of All Time
Joined: Feb 23, 2007
Posts: 5149
Location: Den of the ecdysiasts
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| Posted: Thu May 10, 2012 11:56 pm Post subject: |
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| DogsWithoutHorses wrote: | I understand what you were saying. I disagreed.
I don't agree that it's harder for an autistic man to talk to a woman then it is for an autistic woman to talk to a man because of "anatomy" |
Get a sex change operation and try it. 
| Vigilans wrote: | | Approach, one step at a time (left, right, left, right, etc); when close, stop. Say hello |
I've actually tried that before, and the results were rather bad. Body language is important. I'm not the kind of as*hole who just says I have AS because it's trendy or I'm nerdy and want to feel special. I'm the kind of as*hole with enough body language issues to even f**k that up.
| DogsWithoutHorses wrote: | | Vigilans wrote: | | Approach, one step at a time (left, right, left, right, etc); when close, stop. Say hello |
If only it were that easy, apparently our boobs make it super difficult. |
That's taking it out of context. I never said the boobs alone make it super difficult. They only make a moderate difference. 70 ≠ 65 even if they're fairly close together. But it's still a difference so it would be untrue to say that men and women are exactly the same. I only focused on that example because it is the most hilarious example.
Womens' heightened sensitivity to body language and nonverbal communication are actually bigger factors, though admittedly less aesthetically pleasing factors. Also being more leery of men because of the possibility of rape, which I'm not saying is unjustified, hell, the way I heard guys talk about women when I was in college I'd say it's fully justified, but it still makes it harder.
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hyperlexian
loves the man who typed too much and ran outta spa
Joined: Jul 22, 2010
Age: 41
Posts: 21969
Location: with bucephalus
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| Posted: Fri May 11, 2012 12:15 am Post subject: |
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i have never heard that women have a heightened sensitivity to body language. do you have a source for that idea?
boobs are no more distracting than.... a man's height difference would be.
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Ancalagon
Computer Geek
Joined: Dec 26, 2007
Posts: 2387
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| Posted: Fri May 11, 2012 12:35 am Post subject: |
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| DogsWithoutHorses wrote: | | Ancalagon wrote: | | Get over what? |
"getting distracted" or whatever |
The bits that distract me most are ones that aren't right next to the face. The "my eyes are up here" thing isn't really a problem for me.
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bruinsy33
Velociraptor
Joined: Aug 01, 2011
Posts: 443
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| Posted: Fri May 11, 2012 12:59 am Post subject: |
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| Delphiki wrote: | | rabbittss wrote: | | DogsWithoutHorses wrote: |
| rabbittss wrote: | | I would hazard a guess that you speak to them as you would any other person of either gender? |
You'd think that would be the case. Apparently women are more challenging for a variety of reasons including we don't know enough about motor oil, don't body build, & have breasts.
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Breasts, while nice, aren't as fascinating as faces. I don't always understand what the facial quirks mean, but it doesn't make them any less interesting to watch.. |
I would say that if someone is wearing a shirt that shows a lot of cleavage it would be distracting. I would probably look more even though it is not my intention. It is actually quite bothersome when people have a really low cut shirt |
Perhaps a woman shouldn't be offended in that case .Why wear a low cut shirt and then be suprised that men are going to look? |
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hyperlexian
loves the man who typed too much and ran outta spa
Joined: Jul 22, 2010
Age: 41
Posts: 21969
Location: with bucephalus
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| Posted: Fri May 11, 2012 1:01 am Post subject: |
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i don't think women are surprised when men look, but they may be offended. i worked with a woman who had such expansive cleavage that any shirt appeared low-cut. turtlenecks are not practical in the summer.
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mds_02
Skank
Joined: Sep 10, 2011
Posts: 1941
Location: Los Angeles
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| Posted: Fri May 11, 2012 1:18 am Post subject: |
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| hyperlexian wrote: | | i don't think women are surprised when men look, but they may be offended. i worked with a woman who had such expansive cleavage that any shirt appeared low-cut. turtlenecks are not practical in the summer. |
True, but let's be honest here, most of the time low cut shirts are worn to expose the cleavage. They are designed with the specific purpose of drawing attention to that part of the body, and it is unreasonable to be offended when it works. There are other options. |
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hyperlexian
loves the man who typed too much and ran outta spa
Joined: Jul 22, 2010
Age: 41
Posts: 21969
Location: with bucephalus
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| Posted: Fri May 11, 2012 1:21 am Post subject: |
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| mds_02 wrote: | | hyperlexian wrote: | | i don't think women are surprised when men look, but they may be offended. i worked with a woman who had such expansive cleavage that any shirt appeared low-cut. turtlenecks are not practical in the summer. |
True, but let's be honest here, most of the time low cut shirts are worn to expose the cleavage. They are designed with the specific purpose of drawing attention to that part of the body, and it is unreasonable to be offended when it works. There are other options. |
it depends. i think most women are aware of the effect their cleavage has, but most men don't stare outright. so if a man does stare like that, it is noticeable.
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Delphiki
Launchie
Joined: Apr 15, 2012
Age: 23
Posts: 1350
Location: My own version of reality
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| Posted: Fri May 11, 2012 1:24 am Post subject: |
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| hyperlexian wrote: | | mds_02 wrote: | | hyperlexian wrote: | | i don't think women are surprised when men look, but they may be offended. i worked with a woman who had such expansive cleavage that any shirt appeared low-cut. turtlenecks are not practical in the summer. |
True, but let's be honest here, most of the time low cut shirts are worn to expose the cleavage. They are designed with the specific purpose of drawing attention to that part of the body, and it is unreasonable to be offended when it works. There are other options. |
it depends. i think most women are aware of the effect their cleavage has, but most men don't stare outright. so if a man does stare like that, it is noticeable. |
If a women wants to wear something to try to appear sexually attract to people around her then she should wear something tight to reveal her figure. Not something revealing. That makes me sound like a prude, but I am just going by that the main reason I would be looking at her is that she is being distracting to me.
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DogsWithoutHorses
mockingbyrd
Joined: Apr 06, 2012
Posts: 1145
Location: New York
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| Posted: Fri May 11, 2012 1:28 am Post subject: |
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| mds_02 wrote: | | hyperlexian wrote: | | i don't think women are surprised when men look, but they may be offended. i worked with a woman who had such expansive cleavage that any shirt appeared low-cut. turtlenecks are not practical in the summer. |
True, but let's be honest here, most of the time low cut shirts are worn to expose the cleavage. They are designed with the specific purpose of drawing attention to that part of the body, and it is unreasonable to be offended when it works. There are other options. |
Eh, I tend to think I should be able to what makes me happy. I like the way my boobs look in some tops, I also like the way my arms look in a tank top but nobody claims I'm asking for men to stare at my arms when I expose them. Some people have boobs and don't like dressing in clothes (that often uncomfortably) hide/ignore their existence all the time.
I like boobs as much as the next guy but I know other women aren't getting dressed in the morning with my eyeballs in mind.
It's always reasonable to object to attention that is making you uncomfortable.
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hyperlexian
loves the man who typed too much and ran outta spa
Joined: Jul 22, 2010
Age: 41
Posts: 21969
Location: with bucephalus
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| Posted: Fri May 11, 2012 1:43 am Post subject: |
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| DogsWithoutHorses wrote: | | mds_02 wrote: | | hyperlexian wrote: | | i don't think women are surprised when men look, but they may be offended. i worked with a woman who had such expansive cleavage that any shirt appeared low-cut. turtlenecks are not practical in the summer. |
True, but let's be honest here, most of the time low cut shirts are worn to expose the cleavage. They are designed with the specific purpose of drawing attention to that part of the body, and it is unreasonable to be offended when it works. There are other options. |
Eh, I tend to think I should be able to what makes me happy. I like the way my boobs look in some tops, I also like the way my arms look in a tank top but nobody claims I'm asking for men to stare at my arms when I expose them. Some people have boobs and don't like dressing in clothes (that often uncomfortably) hide/ignore their existence all the time.
I like boobs as much as the next guy but I know other women aren't getting dressed in the morning with my eyeballs in mind.
It's always reasonable to object to attention that is making you uncomfortable. |
oops did i accidentally bend over in front of you? my bad. 
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mds_02
Skank
Joined: Sep 10, 2011
Posts: 1941
Location: Los Angeles
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| Posted: Fri May 11, 2012 1:46 am Post subject: |
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| hyperlexian wrote: | | mds_02 wrote: | | hyperlexian wrote: | | i don't think women are surprised when men look, but they may be offended. i worked with a woman who had such expansive cleavage that any shirt appeared low-cut. turtlenecks are not practical in the summer. |
True, but let's be honest here, most of the time low cut shirts are worn to expose the cleavage. They are designed with the specific purpose of drawing attention to that part of the body, and it is unreasonable to be offended when it works. There are other options. |
it depends. i think most women are aware of the effect their cleavage has, but most men don't stare outright. so if a man does stare like that, it is noticeable. |
If a man stares, yeah it's noticeable. But too many women mistake a casual glance, or even an inability to make eye contact, as staring at their breasts.
Was a problem I had. Eye contact is an issue, so I tend to look down slightly. It was pointed out to me that I was being extremely rude and creepy by staring at women's chests when talking to them. This person had obviously never seen me interact with men because I'd do the exact same thing with them too.
Also, DogsWithoutHorses, before one objects to attention one should also ask themselves whether or not they are inviting that attention. This is something I can relate to personally, though in my case the attention was not of a sexual nature.
It's not as much of an issue now as it was 15 years ago when I got started, but my appearance tends to draw a lot of looks. I have a bunch of facial piercings, used to have even more. Plus a goatee, plus big sideburns, plus my hair used to hang down to my ass. I didn't make myself look that way with the purpose of drawing attention, in fact excessive attention made me quite uncomfortable. At the same time, I recognized that I was giving people something to look at and that it would be unreasonable of me to get mad at them for looking. |
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DogsWithoutHorses
mockingbyrd
Joined: Apr 06, 2012
Posts: 1145
Location: New York
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| Posted: Fri May 11, 2012 2:38 am Post subject: |
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| mds_02 wrote: |
Also, DogsWithoutHorses, before one objects to attention one should also ask themselves whether or not they are inviting that attention. This is something I can relate to personally, though in my case the attention was not of a sexual nature.
It's not as much of an issue now as it was 15 years ago when I got started, but my appearance tends to draw a lot of looks. I have a bunch of facial piercings, used to have even more. Plus a goatee, plus big sideburns, plus my hair used to hang down to my ass. I didn't make myself look that way with the purpose of drawing attention, in fact excessive attention made me quite uncomfortable. At the same time, I recognized that I was giving people something to look at and that it would be unreasonable of me to get mad at them for looking. |
Having those is much more of an active choice than having a chest that refuses to be denied. It does annoy me that due to my body type I get called out for inviting unwanted attention, even in "modest" clothing. You've never had to comfortably dress a busty female frame off the rack. My boobs aren't something I added to my body, they're something I'm expected to hide because they are sexualized and the western world revolves around the male gaze.
I don't want to wave my nipples around without having anyone look at me cross-eyed.
I want the excuse "you were looking for the attention" to go away because it assigns motives based on appearance. And a lot of the assumptions leading to those conclusions rely on "male" being the default audience for our public presentation.
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