How to recognize when a girl is flirting with you?

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It's unlikely that you've only been flirted with twice in the past two years if you're a decent looking and acting guy. Girls flirt a lot in subtle ways so that they don't have to feel rejected if the guy isn't interested.

I looked into some pickup artistry stuff a year or so ago and found that it worked very well (I picked up my first girlfriend less than a week after making a major purchase), but found that I didn't enjoy relationships in which I had to stress out a lot about trying to interpret things that a girl says/does.

If a girl isn't willing to be more direct with you and forgive you for honest mistakes, then she isn't worth it. PERIOD. If she expects anything else then she is expecting you to act like something you're not and she doesn't love you.

I would rather be alone than deal with the majority of women, but luckily for me (this is very lucky for autistic men as there are about 3 autistic men for every woman), I found an autistic girl who likes me. And I don't have to worry about any of this s**t anymore. I've forgotten most of it on purpose because I find it so distasteful.



I will still post some basic advice I remember about girls:

Always be confident (or if you're like me when I first started trying to figure this stuff out, get rejected so frequently that you didn't care anymore so that the girls mistook your indifference for confidence) Confident body language involves eye contact (maybe 2/3 of the time, more when listening) and facing towards them with open body posture

It's harder to talk to a girl if you're focused on making her like you rather than carrying on the conversation (this was always difficult for me because most women are boring) because it makes you nervous and might make the girl suspicious.

Listen to what she says

Introduce yourself to girls you don't know

Ask/say situationally dependent questions/statements with emotional relevance to get a conversation started. This actually goes with everybody: NT talk to exchange emotional information, which is why it doesn't make any god damn sense.

There is nothing wrong with being direct so long as you're not crude ("Imma f**k your buttcheeks" takes a lot of skill to pull off with a woman who doesn't already like you)

Girls like to be teased. However you must make sure that you use the correct voice intonation and body language while teasing or they will think you're mean. If you didn't do it right then you can just tell them that you were teasing with what I would guess would be your usual monotone and they would probably think that was funny.

Use friendly body language (the details are every bit as complicated as the grammar of spoken languages)

People feel attached to people they are similar to, so sharing a similar opinion/experience is good

Lead the conversation/interaction with girls. You can figure out what she wants by making suggestions or just asking what she wants if she doesn't like any of them, but girls like it when you take the initiative and make the final choice.

To avoid getting rejected, girls will often state a desire rather than flat out tell you what they want. For instance "I'm hungry = take me somewhere to eat." "I'm tired = take me home"

Pretend like you know what you're doing

If you happen to be me, then yeah, she's probably flirting with you.

[/quote]It's great that you found an autistic girl who understands you.Congrats! I think the advice you give is overall good but not sure if all of it applies to men with AS.I know as an Aspie male I don't think I will ever give off the aura of being ''confident'',I am too shy and socially awkward to appear confident.I am only speculating but perhaps your autistic girlfriend was very sympathetic to your inherent traits which made you two compatible.I can't act like a ''player'' I can only hope the qualities that I do have such as :honesty,shy,avoids the spotlight will one day be attractive to the right woman for me .[/quote]

Yea, the fact that I fit well with the autistic girl I met is one of the points of the post. I don't have to worry about that player stuff anymore and I'm so much happier than I was before. And as for being confident, you can always put on the appearance of confidence if you practice and have enough incentive. Whether or not you're willing to put in the time and effort is an entirely different issue (and you being willing to do it doesn't necessarily mean that you would think it was worth it once you had done it).

I just remembered one of the best ways to find out if she is hitting on you(this was only used a few months ago at the subway and while she seemed cute and moderately intelligent she was 14(no clue on how it happened))

I was at the subway and some lazy person asks me to move to the seat next to mine so that they could take mine which was nearer. I didnt feel like making some sort of scene so I moved.

In the process of moving some random teenager starts trying to read over my shoulder(I try to bring something to read at the subway so that the ride seems shorter). After about a minute of awkward silence I figured I could try to get to know her better.

First indicator of interest she was the one that started the conversation. As soon as I closed my book she had planned several personal questions and I asked her things about her.
Second indicator of interest she paid attention to anything I was saying as if it was some sort of important speech.

So I asked her age(you never know this days) and once we saw that it wasnt going to work(6 years younger than me) I went with the final test to see if she was really interested.
I thought of the silliest question I could find (the almost unknown work of someone who recently got lucky with a YA book)and I asked her opinion on it( she had mentioned reading that book in English so I was intrigued to see if it was just an issue with the translation or she just got really lucky with the first books success)
This topic that is usually done in a minute/a few minutes took her about 15 minutes and it only ended because we reached her stop.

She saw that I was mildly interested on her reply so she kept going on and on about it.
If that wasnt enough she brought up fb quite a few times(I tend to have my mobile phone at hand and have a tendency to check fb when theres reception)

I think Im going to try to find silly questions from now on and see how they reply(short reply lack of interest...) its not perfect but it sounds pretty good right now