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Should I do this?

 
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Miyah
Toucan
Toucan


Joined: Jul 27, 2007
Age: 28
Posts: 255

PostPosted: Sun Aug 02, 2009 10:37 pm    Post subject: Should I do this? Reply with quote

Recently,
I had been asked by another friend with Asperger's Syndrome to be her maid of honor this summer. However, she was in Iraq for a year and asked me back in June. Her wedding was supposed to be on the 9th next Sunday but she didn't call me for a week about what was going on. Finally today, however, she called me and told me that she was actually doing a justice of the peace wedding with her fiancee and then doing a get together later on which is on the 12th. Yet, she doesn't know what time her party is going to be and told me that she would text the information to me. She also said that it's in the middle of the week and I have to work.

Here's the thing though, I just get this really icky sick to the stomach type of feeling though whenever I talk to her. I am also starting to feel as if I don't like her very much because she isn't very loyal with me. She also acts like a teenager who constantly says, "Shut up!" and she is 27. It used to be cute back in 2005 when I first met her and now it's a cliche. She also seems to talk phoney to me on the phone and it makes me feel nauseated.


Anyway, I really don't feel like going to her party because of what she pulled on me and I don't really feel like she is interested. I also feel cheated out of a promise of being a maid of honor and then her ignoring my calls and e-mails for a total week and then not having telling me what is really going on did it for me.

Do you think I should go?
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ViperaAspis
Phoenix
Phoenix


Joined: Apr 27, 2009
Age: 41
Posts: 745
Location: Portland, OR

PostPosted: Sun Aug 02, 2009 11:25 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

It sounds like this has been building for some time and that this incident is simply the "Straw that Broke the Miyah's Back" so to speak.

You need some one-on-one time to figure out if this is a friendship you want to keep. Going to this social function won't give you that, but there is another thing to consider now: If it turns out you stay friends or become better friends, you'll regret it if you don't go. But if you DO go and you don't stay friends, you really don't lose anything but a bit of your time. My vote is: Go, but get some one-on-one time later to help you figure out the larger picture with her.
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Tahitiii
Resident Whistle Blower
Phoenix


Joined: Jul 02, 2008
Age: 53
Posts: 1865
Location: USA

PostPosted: Sun Aug 02, 2009 11:27 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

You need to work.
It's not fair to your boss/company/coworkers to skip out on such short notice.
There's a special meeting that day and the sky will fall if you're not there.
It's too far away.
You don't have gas money.
You have an appointment that's taken three months to get, and if you change it you'll have to wait another three months.
The dog ate your car keys.
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Miyah
Toucan
Toucan


Joined: Jul 27, 2007
Age: 28
Posts: 255

PostPosted: Mon Aug 03, 2009 12:37 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Alright you guys, thanks for the input. However, she has been playing games with me for two years. I have even tried confronting her about things and and usually has flown off the handle at me. She also seems to blow me off when something is really important like this whole marriage thing. Here I was supposed to be her maid of honor and she couldn't have the nerve to tell me herself. I had to call her mother to try and track her down yesterday which led to her calling me.

When she talked to me, it was a very icky feeling that left me nausiated. I actually hung up the phone telling another friend that I really don't like her.
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Tory_canuck
Phoenix
Phoenix


Joined: Jun 09, 2009
Age: 23
Posts: 954
Location: Red Deer, Alberta, Canada

PostPosted: Tue Aug 04, 2009 4:17 am    Post subject: Re: Should I do this? Reply with quote

Miyah wrote:
Recently,
I had been asked by another friend with Asperger's Syndrome to be her maid of honor this summer. However, she was in Iraq for a year and asked me back in June. Her wedding was supposed to be on the 9th next Sunday but she didn't call me for a week about what was going on. Finally today, however, she called me and told me that she was actually doing a justice of the peace wedding with her fiancee and then doing a get together later on which is on the 12th. Yet, she doesn't know what time her party is going to be and told me that she would text the information to me. She also said that it's in the middle of the week and I have to work.

Here's the thing though, I just get this really icky sick to the stomach type of feeling though whenever I talk to her. I am also starting to feel as if I don't like her very much because she isn't very loyal with me. She also acts like a teenager who constantly says, "Shut up!" and she is 27. It used to be cute back in 2005 when I first met her and now it's a cliche. She also seems to talk phoney to me on the phone and it makes me feel nauseated.


Anyway, I really don't feel like going to her party because of what she pulled on me and I don't really feel like she is interested. I also feel cheated out of a promise of being a maid of honor and then her ignoring my calls and e-mails for a total week and then not having telling me what is really going on did it for me.

Do you think I should go?



Dont go.Just tell her your job is more important.
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Honour over deciet, merit over luck, courage over popularity, duty over entitlement...dont let the cliques fool you for they have no honour...only superficial deciet.

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