Is a career required for a relationship?

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sly279
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27 Oct 2014, 10:52 pm

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
blue_bean wrote:
A career is not essential but an indicator that you're capable of some sort of stability is a plus. For example a guy I met once and was changing direction in his studies and work life like a gust of wind with ADHD. One job, lasted a month, quit that, went to uni to study pure maths, quit that and changed courses, and then changed course again. Then quit uni again to get a job which he of course eventually quit.

I got sick of all the students on OKC claiming they're looking for a life partner yet show they're not ready by doing that thing that's the exact opposite of settling down (ie. travelling; every year is a gap year!).

I'm 31, I just earned my first batch of long service leave at my job as an accountant (10 years full time and counting) and I have my own net wealth and assets. I have no time for guys who have been on Austudy since leaving high school and yet only just earned their first TAFE qualification at 30 (another example of a guy I know). I'm ready to find a life partner and I deem them not ready, and IMO I'm too old to wait around in a relationship with them for years whilst they "catch up" to me. Whats so wrong with wanting my equal in this regard? It's not about the money or status (2 average wages per household is plenty), it's about having the stability, security and maturity to settle down and live a life together.


It's very fair in your case (and for Jjance, despite her arrogant tone).

But this is where things get unfair for guys like sly and retro: even most of their equivalent females want career guys.

I have seen so many entry-job girls (and even losers) who only want career guys...in fact, most of them.


yep. you right boo. seen tons of fat jobless women who demand that the guy who wants to date them must have a great job, be fit, and look super handsome. so they want more then they are willing to give, a guy who is similar to them is worthless even to them.

Jjance is a guy I think or at least that is what the profile says.



marshall
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28 Oct 2014, 1:05 am

goldfish21 wrote:
Now, a few years later, things are entirely different for me. I work, I've saved & invested some money, I have a car on the road, I'm mentally sharp & physically fit.. and after some really awesome conversations with my closest friend, I'm more confident than ever about beginning to date someone/others and seeing if I click well enough with anyone for a relationship. And I would not consider dating anyone that has themselves and their life in the mess of a state that I was once in, so no welfare/disability types would do. I see myself spending my life with someone at least as equally driven to do whatever their thing is as I am to do mine in my life. People on welfare aren't typically motivated, ambitious, driven, hard working, achieving & successful people. Now, if they happened to be 1 in a Billion that was on welfare as a means to survive while they pursued some passion with 100% of their time and energy, then that might be a different story.. but the probability of that is slim to none & slim just left town.

It's possible you didn't have mental illness. Low self-esteem isn't the same as depression. If you're still able to get excited and enjoy some activities you like it probably isn't depression. Low self-esteem will go away if your social standing improves. Depression doesn't always go away. No matter how good your life may seem on the outside, you may still find it hard to enjoy anything. Everything you do is overshadowed by this chemically induced emptiness. It takes extraordinary effort to do the most mundane things because you just don't feel anything. I don't care how proud you are that you managed to "self improve", your pride blinds you. Things aren't that simple for everyone. You're ignorant. You really don't f*****g get what depression is. It's similar to living in chronic pain. If you want to be a prick and stigmatize me I want nothing to do with you. Maybe what goes around comes around and your idiotic pride will bite you in the ass. Maybe you'll wake up with cancer. I wouldn't care. Now go f**k yourself.



marshall
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28 Oct 2014, 1:10 am

I don't know about anyone else, but I'm finding it really hard to empathize at all with all these ungrateful arrogant jack-off types. I seriously wouldn't care if they laid dying in front of my eyes. I'd spit on them. f**k them. f**k them hard. I don't give a s**t anymore. Get me banned from this site. Go ahead. These stuck-up shitstains need to know how their words effect people.



goldfish21
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28 Oct 2014, 1:28 am

marshall wrote:
I don't know about anyone else, but I'm finding it really hard to empathize at all with all these ungrateful arrogant jack-off types. I seriously wouldn't care if they laid dying in front of my eyes. I'd spit on them. f**k them. f**k them hard. I don't give a s**t anymore. Get me banned from this site. Go ahead. These stuck-up shitstains need to know how their words effect people.


So, you're suggesting that everyone should want to date someone w/ a rock bottom socio-economic status even though that's a critical criteria for what they're attracted to in another person?

Sorry bud, like it or not, everyone has the right to their own personal opinion on this matter for what works for them and why. I can't speak for other posters here, but as for myself I'm simply being transparent and honest about my thoughts on the matter being discussed.


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marshall
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28 Oct 2014, 1:45 am

goldfish21 wrote:
marshall wrote:
I don't know about anyone else, but I'm finding it really hard to empathize at all with all these ungrateful arrogant jack-off types. I seriously wouldn't care if they laid dying in front of my eyes. I'd spit on them. f**k them. f**k them hard. I don't give a s**t anymore. Get me banned from this site. Go ahead. These stuck-up shitstains need to know how their words effect people.


So, you're suggesting that everyone should want to date someone w/ a rock bottom socio-economic status even though that's a critical criteria for what they're attracted to in another person?

Sorry bud, like it or not, everyone has the right to their own personal opinion on this matter for what works for them and why. I can't speak for other posters here, but as for myself I'm simply being transparent and honest about my thoughts on the matter being discussed.

I don't give a f**k who you want to date. You said you think I should be stigmatized. There's the problem bud. You say I should be stigmatized, I tell you where to shove your bigotry. I'm not required to be nicy-nice or speak to you kindly. If I met you face to face I would be even less nice. Life is hard enough without obnoxious shitstains like you. Maybe you'll get cancer and nobody will want you. Good riddance.



Last edited by marshall on 28 Oct 2014, 1:58 am, edited 1 time in total.

Sweetleaf
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28 Oct 2014, 1:51 am

I still am curious to see the reasoning for why welfare and people on it should be stigmatized, just because some people who aren't on it would not date someone who is, that smells like some pretty stupid bigotry to me. Though quite certain there are people who aren't on welfare in relationships with people who are.


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marshall
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28 Oct 2014, 1:57 am

All I ask is for people to think before they open their goddamn mouths and spew their obnoxious s**t. People are such f*****g imbeciles. They're too stupid and self-absorbed to even know how to be decent human beings. I add more value to the world living off SSI and volunteering to help people than hustling useless BS and telling self-absorbed wank stories about how I "pulled myself up by my bootstraps". My passion is science. I can't think of a career more boring than business or finance. I can't think of anything more boring in the entire universe.



marshall
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28 Oct 2014, 2:20 am

I think women should stay far away from anyone with a stink like goldfish21. I'm sure he'd cheat or divorce his wive if she got a chronic illness and couldn't work anymore. He'd no longer be attracted if she no longer had "ambition".



The_Face_of_Boo
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28 Oct 2014, 2:32 am

sly279 wrote:
The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
blue_bean wrote:
A career is not essential but an indicator that you're capable of some sort of stability is a plus. For example a guy I met once and was changing direction in his studies and work life like a gust of wind with ADHD. One job, lasted a month, quit that, went to uni to study pure maths, quit that and changed courses, and then changed course again. Then quit uni again to get a job which he of course eventually quit.

I got sick of all the students on OKC claiming they're looking for a life partner yet show they're not ready by doing that thing that's the exact opposite of settling down (ie. travelling; every year is a gap year!).

I'm 31, I just earned my first batch of long service leave at my job as an accountant (10 years full time and counting) and I have my own net wealth and assets. I have no time for guys who have been on Austudy since leaving high school and yet only just earned their first TAFE qualification at 30 (another example of a guy I know). I'm ready to find a life partner and I deem them not ready, and IMO I'm too old to wait around in a relationship with them for years whilst they "catch up" to me. Whats so wrong with wanting my equal in this regard? It's not about the money or status (2 average wages per household is plenty), it's about having the stability, security and maturity to settle down and live a life together.


It's very fair in your case (and for Jjance, despite her arrogant tone).

But this is where things get unfair for guys like sly and retro: even most of their equivalent females want career guys.

I have seen so many entry-job girls (and even losers) who only want career guys...in fact, most of them.


yep. you right boo. seen tons of fat jobless women who demand that the guy who wants to date them must have a great job, be fit, and look super handsome. so they want more then they are willing to give, a guy who is similar to them is worthless even to them.

Jjance is a guy I think or at least that is what the profile says.


lol right, and I am Easter Bunny :lol:.

I highly doubt JJ is male.



AlexanderDantes
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28 Oct 2014, 2:58 am

marshall wrote:
I think women should stay far away from anyone with a stink like goldfish21. I'm sure he'd cheat or divorce his wive if she got a chronic illness and couldn't work anymore. He'd no longer be attracted if she no longer had "ambition".


Goldfish isn't stigmatising anyone so that is unfair to say, he's simply saying that you shouldn't give up on your dreams.

If you are on welfare, invest in yourself and take steps towards improving yourself physically, academically and mentally. Many people on welfare spend their money on alcohol, cigarettes or something that is unproductive for their future instead of learning or self improving.



Sweetleaf
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28 Oct 2014, 3:13 am

AlexanderDantes wrote:

Goldfish isn't stigmatising anyone so that is unfair to say, he's simply saying that you shouldn't give up on your dreams.


I posted 'why should welfare/social assistance or people on it be stigmitized' and in response to my post they said 'why not' and went on about how they got by without such programs and why they would not date someone in that situation, no one cares that they wont date someone in that position more the bit about 'why not' in reference to 'why should there be stigma' seems they where implying they thing there should be stigma towards that...


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Last edited by Sweetleaf on 28 Oct 2014, 3:28 am, edited 1 time in total.

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28 Oct 2014, 3:24 am

AlexanderDantes wrote:
If you are on welfare, invest in yourself and take steps towards improving yourself physically, academically and mentally. Many people on welfare spend their money on alcohol, cigarettes or something that is unproductive for their future instead of learning or self improving.


It doesn't cost money to learn, that's what libraries and the internet are for....and there are even free classes of various things, doesn't really makes sense to pay for like college courses if you're unlikely to put a degree to use. That aside it is quite possible to spend money on cigarettes, alcohol, shoes, healthy activities/hobbies, rent, food ect....its a matter of budgeting for the necessities and then work with what you have left over for stuff you want but don't need people on welfare also buy movies, cd's, gaming systems ect and yes this is allowed because people on welfare are also allowed to buy things they want when they can afford it. Also what if you're dreams don't have to do with the conventional idea of 'success'.


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Last edited by Sweetleaf on 28 Oct 2014, 3:28 am, edited 2 times in total.

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28 Oct 2014, 3:25 am

This welfare thing is a dream for many here lol; there's no such thing here, if you don't make money - you die, evolution.



Sweetleaf
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28 Oct 2014, 3:26 am

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
This welfare thing is a dream for many here lol; there's no such thing here, if you don't make money - you die, evolution.


That isn't evolution actually, pseudo-survival of the fittest is what that is.


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goldfish21
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28 Oct 2014, 3:36 am

marshall wrote:
goldfish21 wrote:
marshall wrote:
I don't know about anyone else, but I'm finding it really hard to empathize at all with all these ungrateful arrogant jack-off types. I seriously wouldn't care if they laid dying in front of my eyes. I'd spit on them. f**k them. f**k them hard. I don't give a s**t anymore. Get me banned from this site. Go ahead. These stuck-up shitstains need to know how their words effect people.


So, you're suggesting that everyone should want to date someone w/ a rock bottom socio-economic status even though that's a critical criteria for what they're attracted to in another person?

Sorry bud, like it or not, everyone has the right to their own personal opinion on this matter for what works for them and why. I can't speak for other posters here, but as for myself I'm simply being transparent and honest about my thoughts on the matter being discussed.

I don't give a f**k who you want to date. You said you think I should be stigmatized. There's the problem bud. You say I should be stigmatized, I tell you where to shove your bigotry. I'm not required to be nicy-nice or speak to you kindly. If I met you face to face I would be even less nice. Life is hard enough without obnoxious shitstains like you. Maybe you'll get cancer and nobody will want you. Good riddance.


Stigmas & stereotypes all come from somewhere. There's a reason there's a negative stigma attached to being at the bottom of the socio-economic ladder. It might suck to be stigmatized, but I can't say the stigma shouldn't exist.

Point in case: Someone with a negative attitude such as yours, who speaks to others with crude language & insults, is likely the type of person who doesn't have the social skills to get along with others well enough to be gainfully employed. There are reasons there's a stigma attached to being on welfare. The details vary, but in general it's because for whatever reason you're vibrating on a much lower plane and haven't elevated yourself up to the level of the working class in mind/body/spirit/attitude/work ethic/capabilities etc and so forth. I wouldn't want someone with your attitude bringing me down in life.

It has nothing to do with quantity of money and everything to do with the reasons people are incapable of earning money.


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goldfish21
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28 Oct 2014, 3:43 am

Sweetleaf wrote:
I still am curious to see the reasoning for why welfare and people on it should be stigmatized, just because some people who aren't on it would not date someone who is, that smells like some pretty stupid bigotry to me. Though quite certain there are people who aren't on welfare in relationships with people who are.


Like I said in my last post, it's not about the amount of money people have as an income. It's about all the varying reasons (mental, mostly, but potentially physical/illness etc) that make them incapable of earning money that typically make them less than ideal mates. People who are capable of working hard and earning their way through life want to be paired up with someone that's their equal, so that they can share in things & experiences in life and motivate one another to continue rising upwards in everything they do. In general, you don't tend to get those sorts of attributes from those on welfare. Almost ever. Obviously there are exceptions to the rule of thumb.. i.e. damn near everyone in a geographic area being on welfare because there are NO jobs for whatever reason etc. But I'm talking typically.


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