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karasu
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PostPosted: Mon Mar 26, 2007 2:52 am    Post subject: girly girls..? Reply with quote

I'm not. I mean, my wardrobe consists mostly of jeans and t-shirts with sayings on them. One of my favorites is my 'I <3 nerds' shirt, and is wholly true because I fully consider myself a nerd. Not that I'm not unfeminine, and being in Japan has made me more...girly, I guess, but I really wonder at times about the mind of the truly, naturally feminine type.

I'm probably generalizing, yet I'd like to know--what is the mindset of the girl who reads sappy romances and buys those women's mags whose subjects are always makeup, cellulite, and sex? I know there is a market and I believe those kinds of women really, truly do exist...I just can't quite conceptualize that sort of mindset. What's it like to be like that? To willingly spend money to see a romantic comedy in a theater? I'll never know...

It boggles my mind. I mean, I'm clearly not masculine and nor am I asexual, and many things about me are female--I like kids and seem to have a nesting instinct, I put flowers around the apartment, I keep clean and trim and even wear a little light makeup. Yet there is a facet of the ordinary female mind which to me is an enigma. Frills and lace, love stories and high-heeled shoes...I'll never really understand that way of being, I think, and while I don't regret it, I find myself curious about that alien animal which I ought to be, yet am not.
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matt271
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PostPosted: Mon Mar 26, 2007 3:55 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

all that "girly girl" sh** is just girls trying to appeal to what they think men want.
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Mike61290
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PostPosted: Mon Mar 26, 2007 4:48 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

matt271 wrote:
all that "girly girl" sh** is just girls trying to appeal to what they think men want.


Agreed
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Nightcry
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PostPosted: Mon Mar 26, 2007 4:53 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

No idea. Probably as the above two have stated but myself I've been tomboy my whole life and see about as much in it as you do.
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Esperanza
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PostPosted: Mon Mar 26, 2007 5:18 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

I've always been an extreme tomboy (I grew up fishing, hunting and trapping with my dad, brother, two male cousins and my uncle), but I do have a girly-girl side. In my early teens I was scouted as a model. I was carefully trained and I worked in the industry for a couple of years with quite a bit of success. It was the one thing I found that helped me to break into the social world. People (male and female) suddenly paid positive attention to me. It was many years ago now, and I'm a tomboy again.

Nevertheless, I retain my ability to be a girly-girl when I want to be. The benefits are enormous; when you look really good, people think you're smart and respectable before you even say anything. Then when you do say something, even if you screw up, you get a lot more leeway. The human species is bizarre.

As for the girly-girl *mindset*... well, I never understood that crap. Matt271 might be right. Maybe girls do it because they're *expected* to be that way, and few of them actually mean it. Because seriously, what 7-year-old kid of EITHER gender would REALLY want to wear nice "don't-get-these-dirty" clothes and shiny little shoes and be prim and proper, instead of wearing jeans and a flannel shirt and playing with bugs? I can't fathom that.
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karasu
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PostPosted: Mon Mar 26, 2007 5:41 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

matt271 wrote:
all that "girly girl" sh** is just girls trying to appeal to what they think men want.


I'm not so sure it is. I read somewhere years ago that children who, as fetuses, recieves large doses of estrogen or something in utero were *extremely* feminine, to the point of being almost like caricatures of what we think femininity is. I wouldn't be surprised if a good many women and girls actually like pink things and bows and ribbons and lace.
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Esperanza
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PostPosted: Mon Mar 26, 2007 5:55 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

I love pink. I think it's a very powerful colour.
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scrulie
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PostPosted: Mon Mar 26, 2007 5:58 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

I like to take care of my appearance and I don't think I'm unfeminine. But I hate shopping and all that girly crap. Plus everyone's having babies now except me and that's all they want to talk about and MY GOD it's dull!!! I want to talk about music and animals and plants.
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karasu
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PostPosted: Mon Mar 26, 2007 6:27 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Esperanza wrote:
I love pink. I think it's a very powerful colour.


What kind of pink, though?
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SteveK
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PostPosted: Mon Mar 26, 2007 6:45 am    Post subject: Re: girly girls..? Reply with quote

karasu wrote:
I'm not. I mean, my wardrobe consists mostly of jeans and t-shirts with sayings on them. One of my favorites is my 'I <3 nerds' shirt, and is wholly true because I fully consider myself a nerd. Not that I'm not unfeminine, and being in Japan has made me more...girly, I guess, but I really wonder at times about the mind of the truly, naturally feminine type.

I'm probably generalizing, yet I'd like to know--what is the mindset of the girl who reads sappy romances and buys those women's mags whose subjects are always makeup, cellulite, and sex? I know there is a market and I believe those kinds of women really, truly do exist...I just can't quite conceptualize that sort of mindset. What's it like to be like that? To willingly spend money to see a romantic comedy in a theater? I'll never know...

It boggles my mind. I mean, I'm clearly not masculine and nor am I asexual, and many things about me are female--I like kids and seem to have a nesting instinct, I put flowers around the apartment, I keep clean and trim and even wear a little light makeup. Yet there is a facet of the ordinary female mind which to me is an enigma. Frills and lace, love stories and high-heeled shoes...I'll never really understand that way of being, I think, and while I don't regret it, I find myself curious about that alien animal which I ought to be, yet am not.


You sound like a girly girl to me! HECK, I'm male, and my favorite color is blue. I wonder if a male wears nothing but pink, or a lot of pink, but I think it looks NICE on females! I once read about an ancient superstition that supposedly ties into baby boys being surrounded by blue, and baby girls being surrounded by pink. Who knows were it really comes from. BTW NO, I wear LOTS of colors. Blue is only one among them. I don't have anything I know of that is pink.

frills and lace are nice, but how many actually wear them? As for high heeled shoes, there are LOTS of theories about that. The two nicest and most logical are to make the legs appear longer and shaplier, and to make their average height closer to a mans average height. Frankly, I think they are impractical and dangerous. I bet most men think that deep down. The idea, and look, is nice, but is it worth it? Frankly, I don't think so.

The romantic comedies can be nice, but most men hate the sappier ones, etc... so what is the point. I, and apparantly a lot of men, view women almost like another species. We don't understand them. That goes for NTs also. THAT is why they have books like "Men are from mars, women are from venus". They ALSO have a hard time with it. As for the magazines? Some women don't fully understand themselves physically and, though they hold all the aces and are almost brought up in a way to fill any instinctual gaps, the want even MORE of an edge. The magazines are trying to capitalize on that desire. So you don't fall into that trap! HECK, you might know a lot of the more worthwhile info anyway.

In truth, you might be easier for a man to understand. And you certainly don't sound any less female because you don't want to succumb to the senseless hype.

Steve
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Aspie_for_the_Lord
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PostPosted: Mon Mar 26, 2007 7:03 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

we are male or female, by what 'parts' we have.... everything else is placed into our head by being raised in our society...
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karasu
Snowy Owl
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PostPosted: Mon Mar 26, 2007 7:15 am    Post subject: Re: girly girls..? Reply with quote

SteveK wrote:


You sound like a girly girl to me!

Steve


Insults! All I get are insults! (j/k)

Seriously, though, in some ways I do get along better with guys--or would if they wouldn't keep trying to hit on me. I think once a person gets out of elementary school, male/female relationships always have an element of weirdness about them. I'd probably be a great gal pal but I'm always highly suspicious of most guys as I suspect they only talk to me because they want to get in my pants. My best friend in elementary school *was* a guy for many years, and it was fine.

Japanese girls/women are a lot more hung up on the whole "dressing up to go out" thing, and will traipse around everywhere in high heels and halfway-fancy clothes. It's unreal, especially as my only concession to being in the public eye is to wear my nicer jeans. But the ultra-girly way of being is definitely something that's played up a lot more over here, so that very young girls are bombarded with cuteness until probably they submit out of sheer exhaustion. Either that, or all the saccharine rots out their tiny little brains until all they can think of is Kawaiii~~. A student drew a picture of me and in it I was wearing a skirt, pants, frilly shirt, and bows--none of which I have ever worn together at once in my life. She just wanted to make the picture cute, though--whether it was representative of reality or not.
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ooohprettycolors
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PostPosted: Mon Mar 26, 2007 7:32 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Aspie_for_the_Lord wrote:
we are male or female, by what 'parts' we have.... everything else is placed into our head by being raised in our society...


Actually, science has shown that there are fundamental differences in the male and female brain. There's a lot of biology involved, not just nurture.
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Aspie_for_the_Lord
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PostPosted: Mon Mar 26, 2007 7:36 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

ooohprettycolors wrote:
Aspie_for_the_Lord wrote:
we are male or female, by what 'parts' we have.... everything else is placed into our head by being raised in our society...


Actually, science has shown that there are fundamental differences in the male and female brain. There's a lot of biology involved, not just nurture.


i am, of course, including the brain.... alot of definitions of Male and Female vary throughout time and culture....

to some, Celtic women would have been seen as Masculine... and to past cultures, alot of modern men would have been seen as Feminine...
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tinky
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PostPosted: Mon Mar 26, 2007 7:59 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

i've no clue. i think it has a lot to do with society, though.
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Last edited by tinky on Mon Mar 26, 2007 8:00 am; edited 1 time in total
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