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skahthic
Phoenix
Joined: May 11, 2007
Posts: 853
Location: Florida
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 Posted: Fri Jun 01, 2007 5:44 am Post subject: Joking or Serious? |
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I get this at work alot, but also with people outside of work. Here it is:
Someone will say something to me and sound all serious about it. They are not smiling. I take it as serious because they said it that way. Then I come to find out AFTER the fact that they were, in fact, joking with me ( they'll say to me " I'm only kidding, don't get all bent outta shape" or "you DO know I'm only joking, right?"). I get caught up in these things constantly and everyone knows it so it's kinda funny to them. But it isn't to me, and it can be kind of embarrassing. Does anyone else have this problem? it seems to happen alot, I can't tell if someone's joking with me or not. |
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Esperanza
Phoenix
Joined: Mar 11, 2007
Posts: 885
Location: Karazhan
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| Posted: Fri Jun 01, 2007 6:16 am Post subject: |
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Sometimes people say mean things and then tell you they were joking afterwards, to get out of the consequences of saying something unfair to you. That is, it's possible they weren't joking. They just lied and said they were joking.
Alternatively, they might be playing with you. They've discovered that they can fool you, and they're having fun with it.
Either way, they're not being fair to you. You have a right to be angry with them for their "jokes". |
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Sopho
Emu Egg
Joined: Apr 04, 2007
Posts: 13905
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| Posted: Fri Jun 01, 2007 6:39 am Post subject: |
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| I usually don't understand jokes. And I find it difficult to work out when people are teasing me or being deliberately mean. I understand sarcasm though usually. |
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deep-techno
Star Power Maniac
Joined: Jan 08, 2006
Posts: 1047
Location: Swindon, England.
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| Posted: Fri Jun 01, 2007 6:45 am Post subject: |
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I just think that joking is an excuse to cover up something really horrible, and it is the quick way out of a debate of why somebody said it.
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If the phrase "you are what you eat" is correct, technically we must all be cannibals. |
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Aldokim
Tufted Titmouse
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Joined: May 30, 2007
Age: 20
Posts: 46
Location: wizzle
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| Posted: Fri Jun 01, 2007 7:06 am Post subject: |
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| I'm different from you guys in that I love it when somebody jokes about like that completely deadpan. I'll suspect it's a joke but won't be sure, which interests me, and I laugh when I find out it is (if it's funny). I like the uncertainty! Didn't used to, mind. |
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giaam
Deinonychus
Joined: Mar 05, 2007
Posts: 351
Location: Dexters Lab
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| Posted: Fri Jun 01, 2007 7:31 am Post subject: |
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| Sopho wrote: | | I usually don't understand jokes. And I find it difficult to work out when people are teasing me or being deliberately mean. I understand sarcasm though usually. |
Yep, thats me also 
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(Just give what I want, and no-one gets hurt 
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Grim
Velociraptor
Joined: Oct 30, 2006
Age: 21
Posts: 469
Location: Brighton, East Sussex
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| Posted: Fri Jun 01, 2007 7:45 am Post subject: |
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| A close friend of mine jokes a lot, and has only just relised how litrally I take things. Now he understands why I do not talk to him sometimes., he tends to say things like I am evil, and since he has said it I think I have been really horriable and do not talk to him for a bit, making him get in a mood with me. |
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Litguy
Phoenix
Joined: Aug 18, 2005
Posts: 669
Location: New Jersey
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| Posted: Fri Jun 01, 2007 8:29 am Post subject: |
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| Esperanza wrote: | | Sometimes people say mean things and then tell you they were joking afterwards, to get out of the consequences of saying something unfair to you. That is, it's possible they weren't joking. They just lied and said they were joking. |
You're correct. That's exactly what it is when someone says that. |
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larsenjw92286
Your invitation to come on down!
Joined: Aug 31, 2004
Age: 22
Posts: 8858
Location: Seattle, Washington
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| Posted: Fri Jun 01, 2007 10:13 am Post subject: |
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That's like what Bob Barker does on "The Price is Right" or Pat Sajak does on "Wheel of Fortune," isn't it?
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Jason Larsen
gameshowdude1986@yahoo.com |
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kclark
Velociraptor
Joined: May 11, 2007
Age: 27
Posts: 460
Location: NE Illinois
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| Posted: Fri Jun 01, 2007 10:58 am Post subject: |
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| Aldokim wrote: | | I'm different from you guys in that I love it when somebody jokes about like that completely deadpan. I'll suspect it's a joke but won't be sure, which interests me, and I laugh when I find out it is (if it's funny). I like the uncertainty! Didn't used to, mind. |
I am similar, but I guess it depends on what they are "joking" about as to how I feel about it.
If they joke about me doing something or wanting something and then leave for a bit and come back to find me doing it or getting it, it is just annoying, often for both of us.
If it can be taken as a mean jab, even when they truthfully intended it to be a playful one, it can hurt if I don't get it right away.
However when it is some innocent thing that is just enough off base to make me wonder, it is interesting like a puzzle. I get to work out if they mean it or if it was a joke. I bet that they find it just as interesting as to why I have to solve such an obvious puzzle.  |
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MrMacPhisto
Phoenix
Joined: May 21, 2007
Age: 22
Posts: 1026
Location: Lost On A Silent Planet!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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| Posted: Fri Jun 01, 2007 11:01 am Post subject: |
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I have a confession to make there I do it myself to people talk serously but I am really joking. I personally don't have that problem
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Look What You've Done To Me |
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Chakapew
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker
Joined: May 31, 2007
Posts: 72
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| Posted: Fri Jun 01, 2007 11:09 am Post subject: |
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 I am so glad that I found people just like me. |
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MrMacPhisto
Phoenix
Joined: May 21, 2007
Age: 22
Posts: 1026
Location: Lost On A Silent Planet!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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| Posted: Fri Jun 01, 2007 11:12 am Post subject: |
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Theres someone at work who is AS I'm always doing that to them even though I'm AS myself
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rossc
Deinonychus
Joined: May 02, 2007
Age: 38
Posts: 318
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| Posted: Fri Jun 01, 2007 11:26 am Post subject: |
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NT's do not act like us. If we don't read them right it is often humiliating and embarrassing. WE have a right to feel this. The have a right to behave like NT's. No we don't fit in. So ought we try to fit in with the 99%'ers or should they fit in with us the 1%'ers?
Now NT mates are a different matter entirely (if they know your condition). My NT mates in as much as they make overtures not to give a s**t about my autism or treating me differently, happen to ask the right type of questions and do the right things to avoid upsetting me. (Read - though they are hard, tough Kalgoorlie Boys they are true mates and still take care of my feelings, just in a blokey way).
The fact is I am always on the look out for social traps and tricks set to trip me up and expose me to ridicule, confusion and embarrassment but that is life as I kjnow it defined by a society comprised of a populace at least 99% freater than people like me. I live with it. |
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richardbenson
slaughter mountain
Joined: Oct 31, 2006
Age: 28
Posts: 9050
Location: plastic makes it possible
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| Posted: Fri Jun 01, 2007 12:52 pm Post subject: |
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oh man i tell you what i hate working and having people joking around. its like uhh leave me alone and let me work. i use to get that all the time when i was a janitor
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As twilight fills the sky
Eventual supremacy
Daylight waits to die
Darkness always calls my name
A pawn in this recurring game
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