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Sedaka
Searching For My Catcher in the Rye
Joined: Jul 17, 2006
Age: 26
Posts: 5218
Location: In the recesses of my mind
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 Posted: Fri Jun 08, 2007 3:21 am Post subject: When did you KNOW what you "want" to do? |
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i always wanted to be a marine biologist... and am currently working on an evolution project in a marine organism...
but it wasn't until i found out about AS ect and found a good grad program to go study autism.... things are starting to come together. i've finally found an interest to work towards for the rest of my life. few more years of school day in and day out.... then just research... day in and day out.
i want so much just to jump into my next (final) phase... that im finding it hard to finish here ><
but when/how did you come to realize what you'd like to be when you grow up?
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tomamil
What the #$*!?
Joined: May 14, 2007
Posts: 1358
Location: currently Paris, France, but originally Asteroid B612
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| Posted: Fri Jun 08, 2007 3:45 am Post subject: |
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i always wanted to be a researcher, too. but i thought i was too stupid to become one. now i am, indeed, working in research. although i didn't really follow the dream, since i believed i have no chance, it picked me anyway. although, i always imagined myself in some laboratory like Dexter in that cartoon.  now, i am working only with computer. this is the latest output of the software i am developing:
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cognizant
Pileated woodpecker
Joined: May 24, 2007
Posts: 189
Location: Ukraine
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| Posted: Fri Jun 08, 2007 6:08 am Post subject: |
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| I wished to be a researcher but it was a childhood dream. Now I don’t anymore. |
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Cernunnos
Phoenix
Joined: Jan 16, 2007
Posts: 869
Location: Nottingham Castle
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| Posted: Fri Jun 08, 2007 7:08 am Post subject: |
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I wanted to do something related to the environment - never really made it though. I worked for the Environment Agency for a year, but that was as close as I got.
I also thought I'd be OK as a technician in a university, because those were the only people I ever really got on with well when I was a student. And guess what, I actually ended up as one.
Now I'd prefer to be an author so I am my own boss, or maybe be a Family History consultant.
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Any fool can cope with a crisis. The art is in dealing with the crap you get everyday. |
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Chuck
le concierge de muse'e imaginaire
Joined: Feb 26, 2007
Posts: 1893
Location: with you :)
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| Posted: Fri Jun 08, 2007 8:55 am Post subject: |
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Love your signature Sedaka - Strangers with Candy is a hoot!
You ask, "When/how do you come to realize what you'd like to be when you grow up?"
As an Aspie, you'll probably never really ever "grow up". I mean that in the kindest and happiest way. You'll probably retain an insatiable quest for knowledge. Your interests may change from time to time. But I believe the "when" is actually found in your past. Think back and examine the interests that you held and the person you were when you were 8, 9, 10, and 11 years old (before biology turned "on" and took over your mind and had you in "teenager/find a mate" mode). Your core personality was pretty much developed by that time. If you will look at old school records, input from your mom, etc. you'll see who that person was and what she liked to do.
When biology finally releases you from its hold (around age 50 to 60) and has shaken its last possible baby out of you, you'll be released from its grasp, a mist will clear, and you may be confused by who the person is looking at you from the mirror.
But don't be afraid! She's no stranger - she's just an older version of the same person who was there at age 11 before biology cast its spell over your mind. She's in you now, just waiting for her time to come back on the scene.
If what you are doing now would have pleased your 11 year old self, then you are doing the right thing. Mind you, your eleven year old self probably had many interests, so you aren't limited (usually) to only one path. If your eleven year old self would have thrown up in disgust over what you are doing, then you have made a wrong turn.
Looks like "day in and day out" came up twice in your post. Perhaps too much of the "same ol' same ol' " in your routine right now, and you see nothing but more of the same in store for you in the future. Sounds like you need a "change" so that you can GET EXCITED ABOUT LIFE AGAIN!!!! You will need career flexibility in your life in order to make changes, and research can give that to you, so your career path may not be a wrong one. You can incorporate the knowledge you have gained thus far in any arena - even autism study.
So, Exercise 1: Time to poke around in your past looking for clues left by an interesting eleven year old kid! She was very wise for her age! Was she a leader or a follower, or an independent thinker? Did she like numbers, or drum beats, or fabrics, or colors? Was she happier inside or outside? Did she like to write? Did she like animals and the ocean? Where did she live? Did she like to dance? Did she like to use her hands? Was she a social butterfly? Did she like to read stories to other people and teach them things, or did she like to read and teach herself things? Did she like digging in the dirt looking at rocks and fossils and flints, or at bugs and flowers? Did she make kites that flew higher than anyone else's? Did she play with dolls and tea sets? Did she dream of answering telephones and filing papers?
Exercise 2: The dream list. Write down everything that you can remember that once was, or still is, a dream wish. "I would like to have" or "I would like to do" or "I would like to be" lists. Try to remember what you used to want at different stages of your life. Don't eliminate anything as being too silly or preposterous. Write it all down.
Now - are there any common themes? Any as yet unattained desires that started from childhood? See any wishes that were dropped due to time or money constraints that still look interesting? See any that no longer hold appeal from your new vantage point? (Discard those.) Notice any that weren't really your wishes, but those of your parents, or wishes that you thought you were supposed to have, but never really ever did? (Discard those.) Ever have any secret wishes that a "good girl" shouldn't have or that "my daughter" wouldn't have? (Include those.) Is anything on the list that falls under the "I'm smart, so I ought to be doing___ or should want to be doing___, when really what I'd LIKE to be doing is____" category? (Include what you'd like to be doing, discard the "shoulds" and "ought tos".)
Is your current job on the dream list?
Exercise 3: Describe a day in your dream job/life - in detail. How would you love to spend your day? (Don't think about how you will get paid for it). Include everything you'd love to do in that day. When would you wake up? Where would you live? What would you be doing? How much time would you spend in each activity? Who would you be with?
How close is your life to this? Could you incorporate more of this into your own life now? All of it?
Best wishes to you, my friend!
Chuck |
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9CatMom
Ailurophile
Joined: Jan 02, 2007
Posts: 5650
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| Posted: Fri Jun 08, 2007 10:08 am Post subject: |
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| I always knew I wanted to something with words. I have taught English, edited papers for other students, been a proofreader and currently work at my local public library. I am looking forward to getting a full time job there. |
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Prof_Pretorius
troubled Soul
Joined: Aug 21, 2006
Age: 50
Posts: 4969
Location: Hiding in the attic of the Arkham Library
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| Posted: Fri Jun 08, 2007 10:31 am Post subject: |
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I still don't know ....
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I wake to sleep, and take my waking slow. I feel my fate in what I cannot fear. I learn by going where I have to go. ~Theodore Roethke |
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postpaleo
Huh?
Joined: Feb 22, 2007
Age: 58
Posts: 3044
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| Posted: Fri Jun 08, 2007 1:54 pm Post subject: |
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I suppose I've really only once got to the point where I did exactly what I wanted to do to make a living. Some of the others were down right bad, others not so bad and a few weren't all that bad. Very early on I dreamt of doing archaeology, I put myself off track, I thought you had to have huge amounts of degree's to do such a thing. To an extent you do, but it's only one way. My obsessions later in life kind of lead me in through the back door and I was in my glory. That they would actually pay me to do something I would do for free. I was climbing the arch world ladder, I was getting to do things most would need a masters to do. I was eyeing what it would take a doctorate to do and I would have made it, had I not burned out on the trail. But even if I had not gone pro, I contribuated to the over all knowledge of the past, just by being interested in what was around me. There are 200 plus prehistoric sites now on record, because of my little obsession. And there is one in my backyard that will stay just as it is and another that just got plowed for the first time in many many years. I'll somehow drag myself into the sunlight to look at that one again. It's about a mile from where I live and maybe about 10000 years old, I just have to prove it, further. It's an important one.
I'm not in my grave yet. I have no idea what I want to be when I grow up. My obsessions and interests have served me well, many times. I've just learned to listen to them better. To keep a postive attitude about what you do know, what you have learned on your own and to be able to sell it to the job you would like to do, is important.
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Fuzzy
Ack! Thbbbt!
Joined: Mar 31, 2006
Posts: 2115
Location: Alberta Canada
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| Posted: Fri Jun 08, 2007 3:53 pm Post subject: |
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| Chuck, that was beautifully wrote. Can I pass that around? My career councilor would love that. I want to print it out and give that to her. If the answer is yes, and you want your real name attributed to it, PM me. |
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pbcoll
Phoenix
Joined: Feb 15, 2007
Posts: 1818
Location: England
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| Posted: Fri Jun 08, 2007 3:53 pm Post subject: |
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Put me down as 'used to want to be aa researcher (in academia).' Not anymore, I suppose when i finish this PhD I'll look for an R&D industry job. I don't believe in an ideal job anymore, but that kind of position sounds the best for me.
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I neither take revenge, nor beg for favours. (Rabindranath Tagore)
I am the steppenwolf that never learned to dance. (Sedaka) |
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Sedaka
Searching For My Catcher in the Rye
Joined: Jul 17, 2006
Age: 26
Posts: 5218
Location: In the recesses of my mind
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| Posted: Fri Jun 08, 2007 6:52 pm Post subject: |
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| postpaleo wrote: | | I suppose I've really only once got to the point where I did exactly what I wanted to do to make a living. Some of the others were down right bad, others not so bad and a few weren't all that bad. Very early on I dreamt of doing archaeology, I put myself off track, I thought you had to have huge amounts of degree's to do such a thing. |
my parents were archaeologists before they retired.
they did a lot of cool stuff early on.... but unless you go into academia and continue research that way.... which does take lots of degrees... if you dont do that, it's pretty much government work for you!
that's what my parents did... and they hated the government. my mom's job especially sucked.... she had to go out and do surveys to make sure companies didnt build over anything important.... well her bosses were kinda shady to say the least....................
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wendytheweird
Deinonychus
Joined: Sep 10, 2006
Posts: 328
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| Posted: Fri Jun 08, 2007 6:58 pm Post subject: |
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I still haven't figured it out and I'm 30. I wanted to be a veterinarian and I majored in chemistry in college. I have a B.S. in chemistry, but I don't want to work as a chemist anymore. My grades went downhill after my oldest was born, so there was no way I'd get into vet school. I'm allergic to all furry things anyway, so that's actually for the best.
I would still love to live on a farm w/ horses. THat's really what I've wanted my whole life. My husband is really not keen on the idea, and I have no idea why. |
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postpaleo
Huh?
Joined: Feb 22, 2007
Age: 58
Posts: 3044
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| Posted: Fri Jun 08, 2007 7:06 pm Post subject: |
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I worked contract arch, whole different world, private bid stuff. Government or private money were often involved together or seperate, but we were never academic or government. Your Mom's line sounds like it. That's the stuff I loved. Monitoring like you describe isn't fun, but give me a phase 3 any year and greatful when you got one a year. Mostly phase one and a little phase 2. Good companys and bad one's, shady does fit some of them. It really depended a lot on how long you were willing to put up with the road and motels. I settled into the office gig for a while, it was nice to be able to inturpet the findings, but my heart was always in the field. I didn't like the boss end of it, but I didn't mind retraining the ones just fresh out of college. They just don't teach them the real world. I never really wanted my name on the work, others can take the glory, that's the in road, they like the added money and glory, they like the ones that will do the doing. It's like undergrads getting over worked and the profs getting the benifits. I just didn't let them step on me, I was good and they knew it. I knew it too.
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calandale
Stellar's Jay
Joined: Mar 10, 2007
Posts: 15131
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| Posted: Fri Jun 08, 2007 7:55 pm Post subject: |
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| Prof_Pretorius wrote: | | I still don't know .... |
Yeah. I think I wanted to act.
Or be a dictator. Didn't really
seem to have the guts for
either though - the risks
of really trying are beyond
me. |
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postpaleo
Huh?
Joined: Feb 22, 2007
Age: 58
Posts: 3044
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| Posted: Fri Jun 08, 2007 8:09 pm Post subject: |
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I'm not trying to hijack the thread with arch-whore stuff. The whole point of this was, we have gifts because many of us get involved to a great depth with things. We look at things with different eyes, different insights. It can be used to advantage.
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Advisory: The hero shoots a lot of people and doesn’t think much about it.
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