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Kittygirl
Tufted Titmouse
Joined: May 31, 2006
Posts: 36
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 Posted: Sat Jul 21, 2007 11:51 pm Post subject: Parents |
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| My mother just drives me crazy. She always panics about the littlest things and doesn't seem to know how to relax! She always wants me to make friends and do things I don't want to do. She doesn't seem to understand that I am an Aspie and I am proud of it. Does anyone else have these problems? |
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2ukenkerl
Phoenix
Joined: Jul 20, 2007
Posts: 4948
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| Posted: Sat Jul 21, 2007 11:54 pm Post subject: |
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| JOIN THE CLUB! You have the average mother! |
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edal
Phoenix
Joined: Jul 05, 2007
Posts: 759
Location: Gyor, Hungary
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| Posted: Sun Jul 22, 2007 7:37 am Post subject: |
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OK, let me tell you about my late parents so that you can gain some perspective.
Both of my parents were very religious, crosses in every room, at church virtually all day on Sunday, no swearing and not a pack of cards in the house as gambling was considered a sin. If my pop was watching a TV programme and there was any nudity or swearing he would turn the TV off until the programme had finished.
Girlfriends were a nightmare and in the end I stopped bringing girls home because it kept on killing relationships. Somehow my pop would always bring the subject round to religion so he could ask my girlfriend what religion she was. One girlfriend was a Roman Catholic and when she told my pop this his reply was "you do realize that you're going to hell to suffer eternal damnation don't you"? That went down really well and for some reason she didn't want to see me after that.
My parents knew that I had psychological problems but they did nothing. At 21 I had a nervous breakdown and I was confined in a secure mental hospital for 90 days. After two days my parents eventually put in an appearance and after my pop saw where and how I was being held he turned on his heels and walked out of the place. They never visited me again and when the hospital staff enquired about this the reply was that "I was being chastised by the Lord and they should not intervene as my fate was in Gods hands".
My father died a year later and I didn't care. In fact I was more upset when Freddy Mercury died because at least he lived life to the full. As for my mom, she spent years just doing what my pop told her to do and when he died she had no idea of how to handle anything in life. She died a few years after my pop, alone, and I don't care about that either.
Apart from that my parents were OK 
Feel better now ??
Ed Almos |
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angelene
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker
Joined: Jul 18, 2007
Posts: 60
Location: behind you
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| Posted: Sun Jul 22, 2007 10:46 am Post subject: |
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no...i can see that my dad has some obvious aspie-like tendencies. he's anamazing inventor to boot.
my mom furiously refuses to accept any of my autism, much less that idea that she may have married an aspie as well. she does not believe in physcology, physciatry or anything, and becomes FURIOUS averytime i try to talk about my aspergers. she claims i'm "very impressionable" and that i just have an "addictive" personality, which to her means that when i get into a new obsession, i have to have EVERYTHING regarding it. duh-huh, mom. thruthfully, if she were to accept that fact that i am an aspie, it would mean she'd have to admit that she KNEW i had problems growing up, and in school and she did NOTHING to help get to the bottom of it. though her lack of interest in me never bothered me as a child, looking back, it's easy to see that she neglected me. i rarely have any memories of her at all.
i'm dealing with alot of anger with her right now. i've taught her how to talk to me without her flying off the handle in a rage because she interprets everything i say as "bad attitude". maybe one day we can talk about the past in a civilized manner.
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*killed by porn* |
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Kittygirl
Tufted Titmouse
Joined: May 31, 2006
Posts: 36
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| Posted: Sun Jul 22, 2007 7:24 pm Post subject: |
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| Well, my mother is really okay I guess, but she is OVERPROTECTIVE and I am 18 years old and I need some space. How do you convince your parents that you can handle the world without them? |
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2ukenkerl
Phoenix
Joined: Jul 20, 2007
Posts: 4948
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| Posted: Sun Jul 22, 2007 7:39 pm Post subject: |
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People have wondered that since the beginning! When you get to be 80, if she lives that long, she may STILL worry!
Steve |
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SilverProteus
The years, no doubt, have changed me.
Joined: Jul 21, 2007
Posts: 7154
Location: Fleet Street.
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| Posted: Sun Jul 22, 2007 7:55 pm Post subject: |
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| angelene wrote: | no...i can see that my dad has some obvious aspie-like tendencies. he's anamazing inventor to boot.
my mom furiously refuses to accept any of my autism, much less that idea that she may have married an aspie as well. she does not believe in physcology, physciatry or anything, and becomes FURIOUS averytime i try to talk about my aspergers. she claims i'm "very impressionable" and that i just have an "addictive" personality, which to her means that when i get into a new obsession, i have to have EVERYTHING regarding it. duh-huh, mom. thruthfully, if she were to accept that fact that i am an aspie, it would mean she'd have to admit that she KNEW i had problems growing up, and in school and she did NOTHING to help get to the bottom of it. though her lack of interest in me never bothered me as a child, looking back, it's easy to see that she neglected me. i rarely have any memories of her at all.
i'm dealing with alot of anger with her right now. i've taught her how to talk to me without her flying off the handle in a rage because she interprets everything i say as "bad attitude". maybe one day we can talk about the past in a civilized manner. |
My mother went through a denial period, but thankfully she's put her odd beliefs aside and made an effort to understand. When I was diagnosed at age 17, she saw it as the psychiatry's excuse for "weak personalities" To her, a person who doesn't make friends easily or is overly timid does that because he or wants to and not because of any underlying disorder or impairment. The tantrums I would constarntly throw during my childhood was because I was a spoiled brat and not because I had sensory problems. Sensory overload caused by going to the crowded market center was not a sensory overload, it was just another symptom of spoilt-bratness.
She grew out of it though. I would lose my patience with her constantly and sometimes not talk to her for days on end, but I guess all she needed was some time (like two years) to digest the diagnosis. Then she became supportive. |
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nobodyzdream
Whistling in the dark...
Joined: Apr 24, 2007
Age: 28
Posts: 1935
Location: St. Charles, MO-USA
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| Posted: Sun Jul 22, 2007 8:19 pm Post subject: |
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My mother is supportive of my son/daughter, but as far as she's concerned, I just like to make up excuses, lol. Ah well, to each their own I guess.
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Sorry for the long post...
I'm my own guinea pig. |
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