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ChristinaCSB
Pileated woodpecker
Joined: Jul 23, 2007
Age: 23
Posts: 188
Location: Lakewood, Ohio
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 Posted: Thu Jul 24, 2008 9:28 am Post subject: Waitressing...? Is it for aspies? |
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| I was wondering if there and any waiters or waitresses here. I think it's the last job on earth I could do because of poor social skills and clumsiness. My mom was one for 15 years. |
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kitty2
Raven
Joined: Jul 22, 2008
Posts: 113
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| Posted: Thu Jul 24, 2008 9:38 am Post subject: |
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| I work as a volunteer in a social centre once in a while, just as a cook, but sometimes you have to do a little bit of serving too which I always find quite stressful. I can only cary 2 plates and I am not really polite too because of poor social skills and I have to focus on not dropping anything. I rather hide in the kitchen than serving! |
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sartresue
Radical Aspergian
Joined: Dec 19, 2007
Posts: 2014
Location: The Castle of Shock and Awe-tism
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| Posted: Thu Jul 24, 2008 9:43 am Post subject: Waitressing...? is it for Aspies? |
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Now serving topic
I worked as a dietary aiede for a year, but when the job ended, I could not find another because the other jobs entailed too much memory and serving skills. In a word: NO!!!!
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Radical Aspergian
Awe-Tistic Whirlwind
Phuture Phounder of the Philosophy Phactory |
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Zsazsa
Phoenix
Joined: Apr 20, 2007
Posts: 600
Location: Upstate New York, USA
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| Posted: Thu Jul 24, 2008 10:37 am Post subject: |
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I worked as a Dietary Aide for several years and did not have any problems with doing such waitressing work. However, in such
a job, you are involved in alot of face-to face contact with other employees, the people you are serving and anyone else who
comes into the kitchen and dining room.
Waitressing also, involves taking orders from people, carrying plates of food on a tray, (which can be heavy at times) and after
serving the people with their food, a good waitress will make several passes by the table to ask if everything is fine, "do they need any additional coffee or water", or other things as they are eating.
It is also, helpful in a waitress job to put on a happy face, smile alot and present yourself as a friendly, courteous person... even in spite of the "bad" day you may be having...if you expect to receive a tip when the people finish their meal and leave. |
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Pond
Emu Egg
Joined: Jul 22, 2008
Posts: 5
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| Posted: Thu Jul 24, 2008 12:07 pm Post subject: |
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I'd like to think, never say never. Maybe you could try being a hostess for a while and see how you do. Are you normally very polite? I tried this before, being a hostess, but once I lost my temper because the customer was incredibly rude and I didn't have the skills to hold my feelings in. But that was years ago I was only 16. Today I believe I could handle it fairly well, but it's not easy, it will certainly be exausting to you, probably as much as if you were a doctor working 20 hour shifts. So, you can do it if that is what you really want to do, but how much do you really want to.  |
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penny07960
Snowy Owl
Joined: Jun 10, 2008
Age: 44
Posts: 154
Location: US - right coast
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| Posted: Thu Jul 24, 2008 12:27 pm Post subject: |
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Not for me! In restaurant work (especially high-volume, like here in the NY area) you have to be ‘robust’ and roll with the punches (recover quickly from set-backs, etc). I tend to get very upset and that just starts a cascade of additional problems.
You are in the middle of taking one order, and someone at a different table butts in to make a request, meanwhile your order is stalled as someone wants to know what kind of oil they use in item X… ahhh!
I want a well-defined, largely static environment with a minimum of personal (personal = nondeterministic) interactions.
If I had to work in a restaurant I would be much happier as a dishwasher or an accountant than as a chef or waitress.
You should walk thro a typical day (your Mom might be able to give you minute-by-minute description of what such a day is like) to decide if it is right for you. |
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Averick
Anarchic Aberrational Anathema
Joined: Mar 06, 2007
Age: 28
Posts: 1972
Location: Sorry, I'm no Jedi.
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| Posted: Thu Jul 24, 2008 1:29 pm Post subject: |
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Yes, it's very possible. But I must warn you against the kind of co-employee trash that those establishment attracts and how those peoples will jade you against living life.
You can make fair money, but stay away from the scene there. |
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AnonymousAnonymous
More Riddler than Joker
Joined: Nov 24, 2006
Age: 18
Posts: 6216
Location: Portland, Oregon
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| Posted: Thu Jul 24, 2008 2:00 pm Post subject: |
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I am considering waiting tables myself
at an isolated restaurant by my house.
Just try it out & see how much you like it. 
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It's time to introduce a little anarchy. |
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Greentea
Bull in China Shop par Excellence!
Joined: Jun 15, 2007
Posts: 1984
Location: Middle East
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| Posted: Thu Jul 24, 2008 3:44 pm Post subject: |
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I've done a few jobs in my life. None were as horrendously suited for me as an Aspie as waitressing. It requires all the ingredientes that are hell for Aspies: multi-tasking, fine and gross motor skills, empathy, socializing, faking, shallow focus, etc. etc. I was a very bad waitress however hard I tried. And I hated it so much I felt like dying.
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pineapple
Deinonychus
Joined: May 01, 2006
Age: 24
Posts: 356
Location: san francisco
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| Posted: Thu Jul 24, 2008 8:13 pm Post subject: |
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I know it wouldn't be good for me, and it seems like some typical aspie traits could give you trouble in the job. But we're all different as to what we can handle. Also, a laid-back cafe would be different than a really crowded, trendy restaurant. If someone magically offered me a restaurant job, I might take it, but I wouldn't seek one out.
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barcncpt44
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker
Joined: Apr 18, 2007
Age: 22
Posts: 71
Location: Anniston, Alabama
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| Posted: Fri Jul 25, 2008 3:14 pm Post subject: |
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 I did this at a resort and I just was stressed out because of the fast pace, i would not recommend it.
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Jael
Blue Jay
Joined: Jul 25, 2008
Posts: 90
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| Posted: Fri Jul 25, 2008 8:25 pm Post subject: |
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This would be my nightmare job because:
1. I am clumsy and uncoordinated
2. Restaurants are often loud and busy
3. There are too many people around
4. The physical pace is too fast
5. You have to remember verbal requests and instructions
6. Your compensation level (tips) depends on being able to "bond" with the customers
7. You have to deal with a lot of different tables at once
I would truly be the worst server EVER!  |
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michel
Phoenix
Joined: Aug 13, 2007
Age: 37
Posts: 673
Location: California
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| Posted: Fri Jul 25, 2008 8:30 pm Post subject: |
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| Well, I work as a bartender, and it's like I become another person, more confident and outgoing, and I just imitate what I see the other guys doing. The money can be good, and I do need to develop my social skills... |
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skysaw
Hummingbird
Joined: Mar 27, 2008
Posts: 20
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| Posted: Tue Jul 29, 2008 12:53 pm Post subject: |
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Temple Grandin wrote an article about good / bad jobs for people with autism / AS, and she put being a waiter / waitress in the bad section.
See here --> http://www.autism.com/individuals/jobs.htm (and if anyone is offended by the 'Deafeat Autism Now' logo in the top right, it's not my doing!)
I can understand why. I worked as a waiter for a very short while, and found it very difficult. It's not so much the social aspect as the short-term memory / multitasking aspect.
I've also worked as a silver service waiter a few times. That was less difficult since I didn't need to take any orders. I was a bit nervous at first about picking up the plates properly. My co-ordination isn't great, but it could be worse. |
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patternist
Phoenix
Joined: Jul 29, 2008
Posts: 538
Location: Flori-duh
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| Posted: Tue Jul 29, 2008 10:17 pm Post subject: |
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I spilled a tray of drinks on a major football quarterback hero once. Yes, I was fired.
If you can avoid setbacks like that, I see no problem with it.
I learned a lot of my working skills and social skills waiting tables. I believe in the long run it was good for me. But I cannot believe any restaurant let me work there past the probation period. I was always doing things that were not in the rulebook, like forgetting to put orders in and bringing them free ("snatched") desserts. Do it if you want to thicken your skin. And literally too, with burns.
And what Averick said? All true.
But as for me I let my natural inclination away from bonding protect me from such things. |
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