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I am Fat and Worthless
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Graelwyn
Myrrdyn
Phoenix


Joined: Dec 21, 2006
Age: 34
Posts: 8667

PostPosted: Sat Mar 22, 2008 10:01 pm    Post subject: I am Fat and Worthless Reply with quote

I am almost 33. Here I am on incapacity because I cannot cope with daily life...how much more of a loser could I be?

I have achieved nothing as far as I am concerned. I just take up space with my oversized body.

I am fat and repulsive and old. That is what I see. My arse even has wrinkles when I lean back, that is how old I am.

I am 125 ibs now but I am still fat, I look down at myself sideways and there is fat there.

I will probably die this time round and I do not care.
I am tired of fighting on for nothing. I never get anywhere and I am alone in the world, I am incapable of feeling loved and maybe even incapable of loving others.

I wish I had cancer.
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aspergian_mutant
Phoenix
Phoenix


Joined: Oct 28, 2004
Posts: 1588

PostPosted: Sat Mar 22, 2008 10:14 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Girl,
your weight is NOTHING,
My ex-wife when we married was around 120 pounds, when we divorced it was up to 350 pounds,
last time I seen her it was well over 450 pounds.

the thing I hated most about her weight is her complaining about it yet doing NOTHING about it,
if it makes you unhappy do something about it, otherwise accept and enjoy who you are.

Come live with me for a while, I will work that fat off your bones.
and the first time you whine about it I would push you even harder.
Like your self and it will go farther with other people,
accept your self and you will be more happy,
make the changes in your self that you would like to see then you will be empowering your self to control your own life.
Otherwise, shut up about it, because no one else is going to do it for you, thats something your going to have to do on your own.


Last edited by aspergian_mutant on Sat Mar 22, 2008 10:17 pm; edited 1 time in total
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Phagocyte
Low-Functioning NT
Phoenix


Joined: Oct 16, 2007
Age: 20
Posts: 1980

PostPosted: Sat Mar 22, 2008 10:16 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Having witnessed people die of cancer, no, you certainly do not want that, no matter how depressed you are.

You logically know that 33 is not "old" and 125lbs is not "fat." You need to take action against your problems and see a therapist; other people can help you get over your problem but you need to take some initiative. You can do it.
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LabPet
alchemist
Forum Moderator


Joined: Jan 05, 2007
Posts: 2858
Location: Alaska

PostPosted: Sat Mar 22, 2008 10:18 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Graelwyn, You are my friend. Now do me a favor. Disregard your name on this OP - pretend it's written by someone named Sally. Read Sally's words. She is NOT a loser - she has accomplished A LOT, writes beautifully, sweet personality, and more, more, more. Since when is 33 old? It's not. Even if Sally were 99 - so what? Does that make her lesser? Graelwyn, you have a lot of compassionate; would you judge Sally based upon this? 125 lbs? NOT congruent with being fat! (Unless Sally is a dwarf or a grade-schooler). Would you judge Sally like this? Would you wish Sally, who is suffering, to die? I know, for a fact, Graelwyn wouldn't wish this on Sally, or anyone! Sally doesn't 'deserve' to have cancer or suffer and she's not alone because, for evidence, I'm reading this, and so are your other friends. I know, for a fact, you do love. You've shown an immense capacity for love and compassion. Give some to yourself. And that's an order.

Please feel better soon - I do not know why you feel badly, but take care of yourself. I know when I've felt badly you were kind to me. If you can't NOT be so cruelly hard on yourself, read your post again, but pretend written by Sally. Graelwyn would embrace Sally, not mistreat her. The Lab Pet does listen to your words. Now you listen to your words.

Can you see your doctor (or equivalent)? You seem greviously hurt right now and I am worried. Show him/her what you wrote.
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Aridarr
the Homicidal Maniac
Phoenix


Joined: Oct 01, 2005
Age: 21
Posts: 1293
Location: Over the stars...?

PostPosted: Sat Mar 22, 2008 10:19 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

aspergian_mutant wrote:
Girl,
your weight is NOTHING,
My ex-wife when we married was around 120 pounds, when we divorced it was up to 350 pounds,
last time I seen her it was well over 450 pounds.

the thing I hated most about her weight is her complaining about it yet doing NOTHING about it,
if it makes you unhappy do something about it, otherwise accept and enjoy who you are.

Come live with me for a while, I will work that fat off your bones.
and the first time you whine about it I would push you even harder.
Like your self and it will go farther with other people,
accept your self and you will be more happy,
make the changes in your self that you would like to see then you will be empowering your self to control your own life.
Otherwise, shut up about it.


Rolling Eyes She isn't fat; she has a severe eating disorder and believes she is fat. Losing weight will just make her sick.
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ebec11
Missing In Action: Innocence
Phoenix


Joined: Jan 18, 2008
Posts: 6242
Location: Somewhere in Canada

PostPosted: Sat Mar 22, 2008 10:27 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

LabPet wrote:
Graelwyn, You are my friend. Now do me a favor. Disregard your name on this OP - pretend it's written by someone named Sally. Read Sally's words. She is NOT a loser - she has accomplished A LOT, writes beautifully, sweet personality, and more, more, more. Since when is 33 old? It's not. Even if Sally were 99 - so what? Does that make her lesser? Graelwyn, you have a lot of compassionate; would you judge Sally based upon this? 125 lbs? NOT congruent with being fat! (Unless Sally is a dwarf or a grade-schooler). Would you judge Sally like this? Would you wish Sally, who is suffering, to die? I know, for a fact, Graelwyn wouldn't wish this on Sally, or anyone! Sally doesn't 'deserve' to have cancer or suffer and she's not alone because, for evidence, I'm reading this, and so are your other friends. I know, for a fact, you do love. You've shown an immense capacity for love and compassion. Give some to yourself. And that's an order.

Please feel better soon - I do not know why you feel badly, but take care of yourself. I know when I've felt badly you were kind to me. If you can't NOT be so cruelly hard on yourself, read your post again, but pretend written by Sally. Graelwyn would embrace Sally, not mistreat her. The Lab Pet does listen to your words. Now you listen to your words.

Can you see your doctor (or equivalent)? You seem greviously hurt right now and I am worried. Show him/her what you wrote.
I completely agree with was LabPet is saying here. I have to do that with myself, because we get so irrational when we're depressed (guess that's human nature)
I like both Sally and Graelwyn, and I don't think you should die.
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aspergian_mutant
Phoenix
Phoenix


Joined: Oct 28, 2004
Posts: 1588

PostPosted: Sat Mar 22, 2008 10:27 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Aridarr wrote:

Rolling Eyes She isn't fat; she has a severe eating disorder and believes she is fat. Losing weight will just make her sick.


Oh, ok, my bad, sorry.
go talk with your counceler then girl,
I at first thought it was just a simple girly vanity thing.
get well soon.
best of wishs to ya.
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Graelwyn
Myrrdyn
Phoenix


Joined: Dec 21, 2006
Age: 34
Posts: 8667

PostPosted: Sat Mar 22, 2008 10:27 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I am not anorexic, I would weigh a lot less if I was and a size uk 8 would be loose, not fitted.

36 inches hips is fat.

Body is all I am anyway, no-one sees the inside, what does the inside matter? I have nothing left inside.

We are no-one unless we are known and loved.

If we are not loved or noted we do not exist.

So why exist physically?
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aspergian_mutant
Phoenix
Phoenix


Joined: Oct 28, 2004
Posts: 1588

PostPosted: Sat Mar 22, 2008 10:29 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Graelwyn wrote:
I am not anorexic, I would weigh a lot less if I was and a size uk 8 would be loose, not fitted.

36 inches hips is fat.

Body is all I am anyway, no-one sees the inside, what does the inside matter? I have nothing left inside.

We are no-one unless we are known and loved.

If we are not loved or noted we do not exist.

So why exist physically?


Errr,
are you by chance manic depressive or bi-polar?
whats wrong friend?
lonely?
---snip/edit---
I just looked at you blog,
tell me what have you eaten in the past week?
I am almost willing to bet you been dwelling on this for a while now, started not eating right to lose weight,
and forgot to take your vitamins.


Last edited by aspergian_mutant on Sat Mar 22, 2008 10:35 pm; edited 1 time in total
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ebec11
Missing In Action: Innocence
Phoenix


Joined: Jan 18, 2008
Posts: 6242
Location: Somewhere in Canada

PostPosted: Sat Mar 22, 2008 10:35 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Graelwyn wrote:
I am not anorexic, I would weigh a lot less if I was and a size uk 8 would be loose, not fitted.

36 inches hips is fat.

Body is all I am anyway, no-one sees the inside, what does the inside matter? I have nothing left inside.

We are no-one unless we are known and loved.

If we are not loved or noted we do not exist.

So why exist physically?
I know you're only thinking of now, but maybe you should wait to lose weight (if you have to, which I don't believe you do). You have all of your life, and I know that when you're depressed (when anybody is depressed), you are slightly irration. I know I wanted to lose weight when I was suicidal a couple years ago, but I decided not to until I could think more clearly. I found that I didn't even want to lose the weight after a couple months.
_________________
Even if you feel like you cannot walk anymore, that your legs are tired and there's a snowstorm out, you need to keep walking. You need to keep walking for those few times that the sunshine beams down on you. It's worth it, even if it doesn't feel like it
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aspergian_mutant
Phoenix
Phoenix


Joined: Oct 28, 2004
Posts: 1588

PostPosted: Sat Mar 22, 2008 10:46 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I got it, girl post a picture of your self here and let us judge for our selves,
if you do not want us to see your face just make one from the neck down,
but I am willing to bet your actualy vary pritty just you do not think so.
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FireBird
I'm confused about being confused
Phoenix


Joined: Feb 13, 2007
Age: 26
Posts: 1765
Location: Cow Town

PostPosted: Sat Mar 22, 2008 10:47 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I wish that I was 125 pounds! I am probably the fattest person in the world weighing more than 99999999999999 pounds. Man, am I fat!!! I used to be skinny a few years ago. But because of all the medicine I'm on, it has made me gain 80 pounds in the last 2 years alone!
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psychedelic
Sea Gull
Sea Gull


Joined: Nov 28, 2007
Posts: 234
Location: Somewhere over the rainbow

PostPosted: Sat Mar 22, 2008 10:52 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I weigh 185 lbs...

(I'm a guy, though. Frankly, I would like to be heavier.)
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The likelihood that my life will get better keeps increasing, though. I wish I could just fast-forward to that future. I hope that future will come sooner than later.
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aspergian_mutant
Phoenix
Phoenix


Joined: Oct 28, 2004
Posts: 1588

PostPosted: Sat Mar 22, 2008 10:54 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Ok girls, let me tell you what FAT is,
I like someone who likes them selves for whom they are,
so the actual weight does not matter to me "unless",-
(1) it gets in the way of my loving and kissing on the girl while making love.,
(2) the weight of your body pins me down to where I can not move if I wanted to,
(3) if there was some kind of disaster you weighed so much i couldn't carry you to safety.

as for looks, your face could be alost like a total scar and it wouldnt matter to me, as long as I like what I see inside you and who you are.


Last edited by aspergian_mutant on Sat Mar 22, 2008 10:55 pm; edited 1 time in total
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Graelwyn
Myrrdyn
Phoenix


Joined: Dec 21, 2006
Age: 34
Posts: 8667

PostPosted: Sat Mar 22, 2008 10:54 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

aspergian_mutant wrote:
Graelwyn wrote:
I am not anorexic, I would weigh a lot less if I was and a size uk 8 would be loose, not fitted.

36 inches hips is fat.

Body is all I am anyway, no-one sees the inside, what does the inside matter? I have nothing left inside.

We are no-one unless we are known and loved.

If we are not loved or noted we do not exist.

So why exist physically?


Errr,
are you by chance manic depressive or bi-polar?
whats wrong friend?
lonely?
---snip/edit---
I just looked at you blog,
tell me what have you eaten in the past week?
I am almost willing to bet you been dwelling on this for a while now, started not eating right to lose weight,
and forgot to take your vitamins.



I am recently diagnosed as bipolar.
I eat 1200 calories a day and exercise for 2 hours + a day .
I am 5 foot 9.6 and a size 4-6 usa, but tht is not enough as when I look down at my own body, I have lots of flesh on my backside.
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