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Mutanatia
Deinonychus
Joined: Jun 02, 2008
Age: 21
Posts: 370
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 Posted: Thu Jun 26, 2008 8:28 pm Post subject: Having a meltdown right now...not sure what to do :( |
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| I got a note from the psychologist (who I could NOT have seen until May-ish) and he recommended me for a single roohat this im at my college. Unfortunately, the deadline to get single rooms was in March. I ask you, how is this fair? How can I have POSSIBLY abided by the deadline? Yes, I know you can make the argument that school psychologist could have done so...but he isn't even aware that I have aspergers. What should I do? I thought that for once in my life at college I could have had a single room and been HAPPY that I had a safe zone. But NO! Now I have to go back to college with a roomy who is most likely going to kick me out of the room, MY SAFE HAVEN, constantly so he can visit with his girlfriend in private to do whatever. I believe that this is unfair...I am SOOO close to just calling the whole college experience off, since it's been nothing but one nightmare after another when people don't turn out to be who you thought they were, and just drop out and go and work at McDonald's or something for the rest of my life. I even wanted to go back early so I could finish my thesis, but now I am just drop-dead afraid of going there at all. I can't take another social disappointment, I really can't, and losing my safe one is not going to help me one bit, but I don't know what to do. Please help :'( |
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youknowandy
Blue Jay
Joined: Mar 16, 2008
Age: 31
Posts: 98
Location: Twin Cities, Minnesota
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| Posted: Thu Jun 26, 2008 8:45 pm Post subject: |
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| all I can say is that I survived with roommates in a dorm for my four years of college. with headphones, even a portion of a dorm room can be a safe zone. most the time, the roommate wasn't even there. my dorm consisted of two lofts that hung over the rest of the room. if i ever didn't want anything to do with what was going on in the rest of the room, i could always just go up in my loft and no-one would really realize i was there. people would want to drag me out sometimes and join them to do whatever, but i was quite stubborn and happy to be stubborn. |
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Mutanatia
Deinonychus
Joined: Jun 02, 2008
Age: 21
Posts: 370
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| Posted: Thu Jun 26, 2008 8:52 pm Post subject: |
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| The problem is, I'm terrified of being kicked out of the room. See, with work it's one thing: You have a 9-to-7 (let's just say for purposes of this argument) workday. After that, you go home. And home is when you're in your safe haven, where nothing can ever get to you. You don't have that in college. |
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Aaron_Mason
Phoenix
Joined: Jul 04, 2005
Age: 23
Posts: 630
Location: Bathurst, Australia
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| Posted: Thu Jun 26, 2008 10:09 pm Post subject: |
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Hey,
I have no experience in this, but if you were to (with the help of your psych) build a case for getting your own room, you could use that to get yourself on some sort of a waiting list, in case someone bails out.
Sorry I couldn't be more helpful.
_________________
We are one, we are strong... the more you hold us down, the more we press on - Creed, "What If"
AS is definitive. Reality is frequently inaccurate.
I'm the same as I was when I was six years old - Modest Mouse |
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silly_rabbi
Toucan
Joined: May 15, 2008
Posts: 273
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| Posted: Thu Jun 26, 2008 10:43 pm Post subject: |
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My roomie in college kicked me out quite frequently to have, um, private time with her boyfriend. He basically moved into our little box (room) with us. At semester, she got caught with alcohol (we were both underage). While we were in mediation about the alcohol all the other issues we'd been dealing with came up. It was quite obvious we weren't getting along, and had no chance of getting along, so they had me move into another room so I could be on my own. So for the last couple of months of school I had my own room. Perhaps talk to someone at the Residence Halls and let them know about the issues, so at least next semester you can get your own room?
As far as temporary coping skills go, perhaps there is a quiet area that you can go to? I know if I needed quiet time there was the back stairwell and I'd go and sit there and do homework/listen to music/chill as no one ever used it. I'd also go for a lot of walks, if your campus has quieter areas perhaps go there. Headphones (music) or earplugs and gluing myself in front of the computer I could always focus well enough that the outside world didn't exist and I never noticed her while she was there.
_________________
There are only 10 types of people in this world: those who understand binary and those who don't. |
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pakled
"Bless his Heart"
Joined: Nov 13, 2007
Age: 51
Posts: 3044
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| Posted: Thu Jun 26, 2008 11:36 pm Post subject: |
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I don't know how it is now, but it used to be that you could swap roommates after the term had gone on. I got rid of a kleptomaniac who was selling my albums for pot (strange, all the triple albums, then the dual albums, etc), and kicked me out of the room for his parties, and I got a fella who I strongly suspect was aspie. Never looked back (well, until he got a girlfriend, then it was out on the couch again... |
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youknowandy
Blue Jay
Joined: Mar 16, 2008
Age: 31
Posts: 98
Location: Twin Cities, Minnesota
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| Posted: Fri Jun 27, 2008 2:06 am Post subject: |
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| no roommate has the right to kick their roommate out of the room for any reason. when you first meet your roommate, it would be a good thing to lay down rules for what you expect from each other. if this is a concern you have, make it clear that you will be in the room whenever you feel like it. |
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