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DJRnold
Velociraptor
Joined: Jan 25, 2008
Age: 17
Posts: 490
Location: Barrie, Ontario, Canada
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 Posted: Sun Jul 13, 2008 7:07 pm Post subject: I can't escape! Help me! |
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I don't want to be very specific about it, but I have a compulsion that consists of both a physical action and verbal words. For the past month or so, I've been doing it way too often, and I want it to stop. But sometimes I simply can't resist. It's been especially bad for the last three days. And what's really bugging me is, when I do resist successfully, I still hear the verbal words in my head! I can't escape! At this point I really, really want it to go away! I want to reach into myself, grab my autism and rip it out of my body! Help me!
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anbuend
Oak-Type Autie
Joined: Jul 06, 2004
Posts: 3302
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| Posted: Sun Jul 13, 2008 8:15 pm Post subject: |
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That sounds like OCD or Tourette's -- have you looked into those? (Lots of autistic people seem to have them in addition.)
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"We may seem in the gutter from up there where you are but maybe you don't know we still see the same stars." -Donna Williams |
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DJRnold
Velociraptor
Joined: Jan 25, 2008
Age: 17
Posts: 490
Location: Barrie, Ontario, Canada
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| Posted: Sun Jul 13, 2008 8:47 pm Post subject: |
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I was afraid of something like that...
This has never happened to me except for recently...
Is it not possible that it could be due to stress rather than OSD?
I am pretty certain that I don't have Tourette's. I don't have "sudden, repetitive, stereotyped, nonrhythmic movements (motor tics) and utterances (phonic tics) that involve discrete muscle groups". |
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spudnik
Ain't I a Stinker
Joined: Feb 20, 2008
Posts: 3775
Location: Calgary, Alberta Canada
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DJRnold
Velociraptor
Joined: Jan 25, 2008
Age: 17
Posts: 490
Location: Barrie, Ontario, Canada
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| Posted: Sun Jul 13, 2008 9:07 pm Post subject: |
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| spudnik wrote: | | Its not an anxiety attack or something along those lines is it? |
I'm about 99% sure that it's not. And I've been at my computer all day, so what would have triggered it if it were an anxiety attack? |
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Glencannon
Raven
Joined: Jan 23, 2008
Age: 28
Posts: 116
Location: Missoula, MT
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| Posted: Sun Jul 13, 2008 9:35 pm Post subject: |
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| DJRnold wrote: | | spudnik wrote: | | Its not an anxiety attack or something along those lines is it? |
I'm about 99% sure that it's not. And I've been at my computer all day, so what would have triggered it if it were an anxiety attack? |
I have noticed that my general stress level increases my involuntary motor movements, nothing verbal though. For the past few months I have been having a lot of work related stress and during that time I have experienced more involuntary motor movements than anything I have experienced before. Even when I'm at home relaxed.
Could your problem be similar? How are your stress levels overall and not just in the moment? |
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trialanderror
Blue Jay
Joined: Jun 02, 2008
Age: 31
Posts: 90
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| Posted: Sun Jul 13, 2008 9:54 pm Post subject: |
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I have AS and OCD. That sounds like you are having some underlying OCD issues. I never realized that I had OCD until I was in my late 20's. My AS got worse and then I started to develop a lot of noticable obsessions. You can have just one or the other. I have learned to control them better (I stress the word better,not completely). The only fail-proof way of doing this is by exposure and resistance. You can have a therapist help you with that, but I did it on my own. I have a thing about helping myself, it makes me feel like I accomplished it comepletely.
Example: I have a real problem with the "what if's" especially with food. I have had such a small menu for fear of "what if I am allergic to this food" or something along those lines. I have been forcing myself to test the waters slowly until I can eat that food without thought or fear. It is not possible to accomplish these things without thinking about it when your trying to not do that compulsion. Give yourself a break there. It has to be one thing at a time. First the ritual then the verbal or thought process. For now, concentrate strictly on not doing the ritual. Once you get a handle on that, you may notice that the thoughts or verbal cues will have died off some to a managable level. Also know that when one thing is taken away,it is usally replaced by something else. Find a hobby. It is very common for an AS person to get engrossed in one thing which can contribute to OCD. If there has to be something, let it be an outlet- a hobby. I like to get into living sustainable. It's my thing. Find yours. Just remember that you can't get over everything all at once. OCD is the most treatable condition, if that makes you feel any better. Probably because it all comes down to motivation and suport. It is just a habit, even if it is new.
If you need privacy to talk futher, you can contact me in my account. Don't give up and good for you for loking for help. |
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LabPet
Phoenix
Joined: Jan 05, 2007
Posts: 1803
Location: Alaska
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| Posted: Mon Jul 14, 2008 1:50 am Post subject: |
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13 head bangers in synchronization.....
Sorry, I know you're hurt. You know of echolalia, yes? Part of autism for many. Sometimes I hear echo in my head and see after-images, but this a bit different from what you described. Echolalia is common (amongst our kind), even expected. I think many gave good advice already. Another approach may be a speech therapist. I am only partly-verbal which means I often write instead of speak. I've never been to a speech therapist but they can help, especially with echolalia. Don't give up. Plus, this is a result of your condition and isn't voluntary! Can you reveal to some others what the problem is, just so they're not hard on you about this?
You said this has been worse in the past 3 days which might indicate a specific source/cause of the stress. Do you know what that might be? Since this hasn't been as acutely pervasive for you, it likely won't continue like this - that's good news.
I know one who was/is a stutterer. One similar technique is to let yourself repeat the words! Don't fight it....echolalia. Sometimes trying really hard just makes it more stressful, which you don't need.
Don't bang your head - ouch!  I do hope you feel better. And you will.
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same nightmare, different nap
Lab Pet, therapist slayer
Lab Pet's video: Autism is Synonymous with Science: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xYelVlA7kDw |
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LabPet
Phoenix
Joined: Jan 05, 2007
Posts: 1803
Location: Alaska
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| Posted: Mon Jul 14, 2008 1:55 am Post subject: |
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DJRnold, just to include: Does music help? Can you try?
I use a digital metronome everyday, not for speech, but to pace myself. And it's very calming, like the drip drip drip of titration, which I love. Maybe like a heartbeat. This might really help! Choose rythymic music you really like. You can listen via iPod, whatever, so it's not distracting or noticed by others. Really takes the pressure off, or maybe diverts.
My digital metronome has a visual pendulum. I couldn't do without.
DJRnold - check out this video/music. Watch the blue words go by - I think you'll like and the rythym is just fun:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=emM_juVdzds&NR=1
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same nightmare, different nap
Lab Pet, therapist slayer
Lab Pet's video: Autism is Synonymous with Science: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xYelVlA7kDw |
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Bradleigh
Skilled Aspie Magician
Joined: May 26, 2008
Age: 18
Posts: 4267
Location: Sydney, Australia
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| Posted: Mon Jul 14, 2008 2:01 am Post subject: |
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I think I did something like this but for some reason my mind has some how removed all information on it, I am trying to remember but it is like looking into a box in my memory I have emptied.
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7th virtue: Humility |
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lucy1
Deinonychus
Joined: Aug 17, 2007
Posts: 329
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| Posted: Mon Jul 14, 2008 5:50 am Post subject: |
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Being on the computer all day is probably not helping your brain to relax - an inablity to relax will lead to feelings of extreme agitation (well, it does in my case). I think the brain can become overactive - and agitated if too much time is spent on the computer. Too do with brain wave patterns - perhaps???
I take venlafaxine for low mood - this medication helps with feelings of an agitated mind.
I can become obsessive about the computer - this antidepressant softens feelings of OCD and agitation.
Maybe worth taking to your doctor about. |
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DJRnold
Velociraptor
Joined: Jan 25, 2008
Age: 17
Posts: 490
Location: Barrie, Ontario, Canada
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| Posted: Mon Jul 14, 2008 1:44 pm Post subject: |
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| LabPet wrote: | | DJRnold, just to include: Does music help? Can you try? |
I have tried. I don't do it as often when I'm listening to music, but I still do it. |
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spudnik
Ain't I a Stinker
Joined: Feb 20, 2008
Posts: 3775
Location: Calgary, Alberta Canada
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| Posted: Wed Jul 16, 2008 12:40 am Post subject: |
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Forgive me I am clutching at straws, but maybe there is some sort of environmental noise, such as florescent lights, if the ballast is bad they make a high frequency hum that can cause some discomfort, old monitors and televisions can make a similar sound. Try leaving the house and go to a park, somewhere with no artificial sounds, to see if anything changes.
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