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NeantHumain
Phoenix
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Joined: Jun 25, 2004
Posts: 3717
Location: St. Louis, Missouri
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 Posted: Sun Aug 10, 2008 1:41 am Post subject: The Female Conspiracy |
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Women have conspired against me.
That is all I can conclude from the succession of different women who have taken it upon themselves to just mess with me. Today it happened again. This time the woman initiated conversation, and I obliged. She was attractive but a few years older. Nevertheless, I was in a desirous mood and open to a possible advance. The conversation began when she commented on how she liked my swimming, and I asked her if she swam much. We talked awhile, and she started going on about some absolutely ridiculous story about her background that she kept trying to pass off as her lifestyle and thus unassailable. Perhaps my mistake was to too quickly make clear my interest, which is like showing one's hand in poker. She had what she wanted (validation of attraction), so all she had left was to mess with me. Stupid.
The fact that so many women have decided to mess with me leads me to conclude that many women have gotten together and decided to collectively mess with me, or there is something about me or something that I am doing that induces many women to mess with me (a metaphorical kick-me sign).
Does anyone have any ideas of why this is happening? |
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ouinon
chemical reaction
Joined: Jul 11, 2007
Posts: 3444
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| Posted: Sun Aug 10, 2008 1:58 am Post subject: |
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Maybe you look different to how/who you are. Maybe you have a physical appearance/style( clothing and/or hair and/or gestures)/carriage/posture which suggests somebody unlike you. Maybe you are sending out signals appropriate for a "someone else".
So as soon as a woman has had a few words with you she discovers that and moves on.
I think it may well be an aspie thing, to send out a set of signals which although perfectly "correct" are actually not one's own, but copied laboriously off a series of templates, fantasy and real life ones, and which give misleading signals about who one is.
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"Life is pain; anyone who says different is selling something" |
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Gamester
Buracrate in the Making
Joined: Nov 23, 2006
Age: 21
Posts: 2884
Location: Newberg, OR
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| Posted: Sun Aug 10, 2008 2:31 am Post subject: Re: The Female Conspiracy |
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| NeantHumain wrote: | Women have conspired against me.
That is all I can conclude from the succession of different women who have taken it upon themselves to just mess with me. Today it happened again. This time the woman initiated conversation, and I obliged. She was attractive but a few years older. Nevertheless, I was in a desirous mood and open to a possible advance. The conversation began when she commented on how she liked my swimming, and I asked her if she swam much. We talked awhile, and she started going on about some absolutely ridiculous story about her background that she kept trying to pass off as her lifestyle and thus unassailable. Perhaps my mistake was to too quickly make clear my interest, which is like showing one's hand in poker. She had what she wanted (validation of attraction), so all she had left was to mess with me. Stupid.
The fact that so many women have decided to mess with me leads me to conclude that many women have gotten together and decided to collectively mess with me, or there is something about me or something that I am doing that induces many women to mess with me (a metaphorical kick-me sign).
Does anyone have any ideas of why this is happening? |
Female Conspiracy??
Yah. right.
It's not them.
It's you.
You're coming on as too strong or desperate. or both.
_________________
I don't believe in mercy without it being reciprocated.
I don't judge unless it's necessary.
I believe in the golden rule, except in the case of those who have no standing in my opinion.
I'm all for a world where those with disabilities are viewed as |
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zen_mistress
In Pursuit of a Peaceful Life
Joined: Jun 12, 2007
Age: 31
Posts: 1102
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| Posted: Sun Aug 10, 2008 2:38 am Post subject: |
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Girlfriends are like bank loans. You are more likely to get one if you appear to not need one...
_________________
Glory be to God for dappled things,
For skies of couple-colour as a brinded cow,
For rose-moles all in stipple upon trout that swim;
Fresh-firecoal chestnut-falls, finches’ wings.
~ Gerard Manley Hopkins
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Cyberman
Cyber Lieutenant
Joined: Apr 25, 2008
Posts: 1259
Location: Cyber Control
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| Posted: Sun Aug 10, 2008 2:49 am Post subject: |
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| zen_mistress wrote: | | Girlfriends are like bank loans. You are more likely to get one if you appear to not need one... |
Hehe, very true. That's why I always say that the real problem is the "wanting," not the singleness. |
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Aspinator
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker
Joined: Feb 24, 2008
Posts: 74
Location: AspinatorLand
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| Posted: Sun Aug 10, 2008 3:44 am Post subject: Female Conspiracy |
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Give me a break. It appears you are not interested in a woman as a friend or just getting to know her; you just want to get laid.
That type of thinking is repellent to women.
It is not surprising they moved on. |
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Postperson
The Daughter of Indifference
Joined: Jul 10, 2004
Age: 51
Posts: 2904
Location: Uz
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| Posted: Sun Aug 10, 2008 4:19 am Post subject: Re: The Female Conspiracy |
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| NeantHumain wrote: | She had what she wanted (validation of attraction), so all she had left was to mess with me. Stupid.
Does anyone have any ideas of why this is happening? |
you nailed it there. it's also called 'after you get what you want, you don't want it any more' guys do it too.
you gotta play hard to get, cool. who needs you. or something like that. i'm bad at it too. |
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sgrannel
Phoenix
Joined: Feb 21, 2008
Posts: 550
Location: USA
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| Posted: Sun Aug 10, 2008 5:06 am Post subject: |
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| zen_mistress wrote: | | Girlfriends are like bank loans. You are more likely to get one if you appear to not need one... |
And they want proof of income too. Same is also true when renting an apartment.
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You should get to know me better. No one's ever what they seem.-- Shirley Manson |
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Aspie1
Overman
Joined: Mar 08, 2005
Posts: 2515
Location: United States
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| Posted: Sun Aug 10, 2008 5:08 am Post subject: Re: Female Conspiracy |
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| Aspinator wrote: | Give me a break. It appears you are not interested in a woman as a friend or just getting to know her; you just want to get laid.
That type of thinking is repellent to women.
It is not surprising they moved on. |
That's the harsh reality. Women don't like to be viewed as just sex partners, or worse, prostitutes. Unless, of course, she's an actual prostitute. And it seem like that's what you need right now. You have a lot of pent-up sexual frustration, and it shows big time, scaring women off in the process. So you should either find ways to hide your sexual frustration, or go out and see an escort even just once. Both solutions will reduce the factor that scares women away, and the latter is actually better, because it'll help demystify women for you. I once had a sexual frustration problem myself, and that's what helped me. Women used to be mysterious, enigmatic people I just couldn't understand, and I viewed them as highly unattainable; now they're just human being with female parts, and I view them as people not much different from me. |
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donkey
we have met the enemy, he is us.
Joined: May 22, 2006
Age: 37
Posts: 1478
Location: ireland
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| Posted: Sun Aug 10, 2008 7:59 am Post subject: Re: The Female Conspiracy |
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| NeantHumain wrote: |
The fact that so many women have decided to mess with me leads me to conclude that many women have gotten together and decided to collectively mess with me, or there is something about me or something that I am doing that induces many women to mess with me (a metaphorical kick-me sign).
Does anyone have any ideas of why this is happening? |
ok its likely it isnt their problem the fact that it is a recurring problem should be a hint as to where the problem is.
look for the enemy, he is closer than you think.
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a great civilisation cannot be conquered from without until it has destroyed itself from within- W. Durant |
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Beenthere
10 Miles South of Sanity
Joined: Dec 30, 2005
Age: 41
Posts: 2115
Location: Pa.
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| Posted: Sun Aug 10, 2008 10:41 am Post subject: |
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Everytime a woman chooses to initiate conversation with a man does not mean they're necessarily attracted to them or interested in them.
Some just like to talk.
She liked your swimming, she stated as much...maybe she simply wished she could swim as well as you do.
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*Normal* is just a setting on the dryer. |
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NeantHumain
Phoenix
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Joined: Jun 25, 2004
Posts: 3717
Location: St. Louis, Missouri
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| Posted: Sun Aug 10, 2008 1:15 pm Post subject: |
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| Beenthere wrote: | Everytime a woman chooses to initiate conversation with a man does not mean they're necessarily attracted to them or interested in them.
Some just like to talk.
She liked your swimming, she stated as much...maybe she simply wished she could swim as well as you do. |
Well, I think she was trying the socially dominant or "alpha" approach that's usually advertised here and elsewhere on the Internet for guys instead of women. Plus as she and her friend were joking around about being "w****s," which is something fairly "open" women tend to joke about. On the downside (and you'd probably expect a downside from women like that), she smokes, and she admitted unasked that, when she took Spanish, she used her boyfriend of the time to do all her Spanish homework for her. She ended up talking to no end about some religion she had just made up, which was some hodge-podge perversion of several religions plus some bizarre randomness to back her claim (this is why I say she was just messing with me). When I left, she continued to insist upon her wacko religion that I "just didn't understand."
Now obviously she's not some exemplar woman, but she is indicative, albeit more extreme, of the messing-with-me trend among women. |
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NeantHumain
Phoenix
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Joined: Jun 25, 2004
Posts: 3717
Location: St. Louis, Missouri
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| Posted: Sun Aug 10, 2008 1:17 pm Post subject: |
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| ouinon wrote: | Maybe you look different to how/who you are. Maybe you have a physical appearance/style( clothing and/or hair and/or gestures)/carriage/posture which suggests somebody unlike you. Maybe you are sending out signals appropriate for a "someone else".
So as soon as a woman has had a few words with you she discovers that and moves on. |
Or discovers that and decides to mess with me? How would one know if one is giving off a persona that is different from oneself? |
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zghost
Phoenix
Joined: Oct 29, 2007
Posts: 767
Location: Southeast Texas
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| Posted: Sun Aug 10, 2008 2:38 pm Post subject: |
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I don't know. I'm female, and I've gotten the same sort of reactions from guys. Seriously, they seem interested, talk a little, then dissappear.
Something about me seems to just say "get out while you can" or something.
People typically find me quite strange until they get used to me. |
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Apatura
Mimosa pudica
Joined: Jul 25, 2006
Age: 35
Posts: 1240
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| Posted: Sun Aug 10, 2008 2:41 pm Post subject: Re: The Female Conspiracy |
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| Postperson wrote: |
you gotta play hard to get, cool. who needs you. or something like that. i'm bad at it too. |
But I've always thought of "playing hard to get" as a conspiratorial game in and of itself. Why can't people just be direct and blunt with each other and simply state what they're feeling? It would save a lot of time and effort. How decent could a relationship ever be if it fails at an open sign of interest, and requires feigned disinterest at the outset?
Neanthumain, I doubt there is an organized conspiracy against you. Think of all the organization such a conspiracy would require. It's not realistic.
You might be giving off a "weirdness" vibe that scares them away. |
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