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prillix
Snowy Owl
Joined: Aug 12, 2008
Age: 23
Posts: 160
Location: Sudbury Ontario --- Soon Edmonton Alberta
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 Posted: Thu Aug 21, 2008 7:27 pm Post subject: Have you ever escaped your family? |
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Growing up i wasnt lucky enough to have all the love and support from my family that i should have, and it seems like no matter what i try they never wanna change anything about that. So im moving away at the end of the month, im going to a town about 150km away to try and get a job, im doing it there for a week and if i dont get something good, im moving 3000km to a town that i know for sure i can make some good money and finally live a life that i was never able to.
Has anybody else with aspergers ever been in this situation, have you ever escaped your family? |
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Sir_Beefy
Snowy Owl
Joined: Jun 10, 2008
Age: 20
Posts: 126
Location: Middle of Nowhere, Maryland
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| Posted: Thu Aug 21, 2008 7:32 pm Post subject: |
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I want to escape my family. Never have though, except for the time I ran away.
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Clones are people two |
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ghouna
Toucan
Joined: Jul 15, 2008
Age: 27
Posts: 254
Location: London UK
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| Posted: Thu Aug 21, 2008 7:38 pm Post subject: |
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whn i was 19, i was working in my town hall (accountancy). and i was reading the newspaper (of course in a office!). My mum was on holiday.
I saw an ad, to be an au pair in the uk. (i am from france).
I applied, and they accepted me.
When my mum came back i told her "i am going to the uk in 4 days for a year"
I never came back (well i did for holidays..).
We are not very good at communication at home, so the only thing for me to do was leaving without having to explain that i want to be on my own... |
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CelticRose
Albatross!
Joined: Jul 20, 2008
Posts: 1087
Location: Mesa, AZ, USA, Third Rock from the Sun
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| Posted: Thu Aug 21, 2008 8:49 pm Post subject: |
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I grew up in a dysfunctional, abusive family. When I was 18, my mother kicked me out of the house. Over the years, I have severed ties with my immediate family. The rest of my family only communicated with my mother. The best thing I ever did was to get away from these people.
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Fnord
Metasyntactic Variable
Joined: May 07, 2008
Posts: 3658
Location: Pantopia
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| Posted: Thu Aug 21, 2008 8:52 pm Post subject: |
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My relatives live about 3000 miles away.
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claire333
Huh?
Joined: Jun 20, 2008
Posts: 1893
Location: Lost in my own little world.
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| Posted: Thu Aug 21, 2008 9:42 pm Post subject: |
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I have escaped the ones I needed to. The others I hold quite dear.
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On with the show...This is it. |
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LostInEmulation
Penguin
Joined: Feb 11, 2008
Posts: 1271
Location: Germany
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| Posted: Thu Aug 21, 2008 10:26 pm Post subject: |
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I didn't and landed inside of a psychiatric clinic, after that (and an arranged talk with my parents there) I managed to gain enough distance no longer to go crazy. It is not an escape since I live in walking distance to Ma's work place, but it's my own room and my own rules!
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Dragonfly_Dreams
Deinonychus
Joined: May 19, 2008
Posts: 332
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| Posted: Thu Aug 21, 2008 10:28 pm Post subject: |
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I cut contact with them about 6 years ago. I'm very happy I did.  |
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Postperson
The Daughter of Indifference
Joined: Jul 10, 2004
Age: 51
Posts: 2904
Location: Uz
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| Posted: Thu Aug 21, 2008 10:47 pm Post subject: |
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There's a cliche that 'you marry to escape your parents'.
Or work or financial independence can do that too.
I moved states to get away from them, I don't think I really left them behind until I was about 40 though. I kept thinking they must feel something for me, we're family. They don't. I should have stopped fooling myself a lot earlier. |
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nettiespaghetti
Deinonychus
Joined: May 23, 2008
Age: 29
Posts: 323
Location: Michigan
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| Posted: Thu Aug 21, 2008 11:18 pm Post subject: |
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In a way my situation was similar and I did pack my bags and move even though my father kept telling me I couldn't.... funny though, I was 18 years old so obviously he couldn't legally stop me and he didn't. I don't want to say my parents were horrible, but I came from a very unloving dysfunctional family for the most part. I had to get away to keep any of my sanity. I did and I'm glad for it because I know it helped me tremendously.
I wish the best for you. I guess if I was to be so bold as to give advice....move out and just focus on your new job for right now. Maybe you can get a little nest egg in the bank to feel more secure being on your own. Then after that you can start to focus on other things and perhaps your family will start to come around if they see how well you're doing for yourself. And if they don't it's THEIR loss! Don't let them win, don't let them drag you down. Show them what you're made of
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CockneyRebel
Sid The Love Rat is a Sweet Pea :O)
Joined: Jul 18, 2004
Age: 34
Posts: 21088
Location: Out in the evening, with me two best Rat Mates :O)
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| Posted: Thu Aug 21, 2008 11:22 pm Post subject: |
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I've made the big escape, in the November of 2006.
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Sid The Rat is everything that I stand for. We're both large, proud Punkers with Cockney accents. We both have the same issues, as well. I don't see anything wrong, with that. I was put on this planet, to make myself happy. Sid :O) |
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Spokane_Girl
I would walk 500 miles and I would walk 500 more
Joined: Jul 17, 2007
Age: 23
Posts: 3853
Location: Benny & Joon town (I wish)
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| Posted: Thu Aug 21, 2008 11:31 pm Post subject: |
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I wanted to move out when I was 16 because I hated the messes my family made and my brothers having parties and too many friends over. I moved out at 19 and then moved over 500 miles away from them a year and a half ago.
No I never not saw them again. I still visit them and now they come out and see me. I let my brother and his friend stay here when they came out here. I would never want to shut my whole family out of my life.
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sinsboldly
Free Range Aspie
Joined: Nov 22, 2006
Age: 57
Posts: 8059
Location: Oregon, USA
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| Posted: Fri Aug 22, 2008 12:00 am Post subject: |
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I promised my folks I would move out as soon as I was 18, and since I graduated school 6 months before my 18th birthday, my folk helped me pick out a room with a nice older couple whose last young woman roommate got in the 'family way,' near the college and before the first week was over the old man down stairs let him self into my apartment when I was in the shower. I kicked him so hard and scratched his face he let me go. I didn't want to go back there so I stayed with a guy I had met. My folks couldn't believe the old man "would do that" and they put me in the State Hospital, for being 'wayward' and 'incorrigible.' 9 months later in 1969 I escaped on a day pass and this time I hitchhiked my way to the Woodstock Festival in New York State and beyond.
I went back once when I was 21, and realized it was a mistake. I went back twenty year later to do my 9th step, and after that, two days before my mother died and then to help my brother clean out their place after my dad shot himself. I haven't seen or talked to my brother since, nor do I expect to.
Family is not for everyone, I guess.
Merle
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Loborojo
Phoenix
Joined: Aug 20, 2008
Age: 49
Posts: 931
Location: wherever I lay my head (now in Ecuador)
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| Posted: Fri Aug 22, 2008 10:46 am Post subject: |
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with my family it never worked, I was always the oddball and always told I was one. The only person I can deal with now is my aging mum, and I bet I got the aspieness from her and my dad. The combination did it. I try to get us together as a family but it won't work and when I say now I am an aspie they just see it as another excuse for doing and being what I am. No understanding whatsoever, hopeless!!!
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PrisonerSix
Velociraptor
Joined: Jul 16, 2004
Posts: 456
Location: The Village
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| Posted: Fri Aug 22, 2008 1:40 pm Post subject: |
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It took me many years to find a way to escape my family, and I have almost. They want to have a reunion now and are trying to guilt me into going, but I don't want to go. They don't like taking no for an answer from me. They leave me alone for the most part, but have started bothering me again.
I live in a city where none of them live, which helps alot. I don't want to spend time with them because I've had way too much of their treating me a like a lower class citizen who doesn't have the same rights and freedoms of the general population.
Those days are over, I'm free.
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PrisonerSix
"I am not a number, I am a free man!" |
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