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en_una_isla
Queen of the Nile
Joined: Nov 01, 2005
Posts: 2862
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 Posted: Tue Nov 01, 2005 8:56 pm Post subject: social phobias, anyone? |
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Hi, I am new here 
I am wondering if anyone can identify with really severe social phobias, beyond just discomfort. I have very strong social phobias, that have worsened over the past few years. I am afraid to open the door for the UPS man, to answer the phone, or even to get the mail. It is very difficult for me to interact with people face-to-face.  I don't know why this is; I just feel it is very difficult to communicate myself to other people, as though we were all speaking disparate languages. Sort of like the Tower of Babel just occurred and there I am staring at these people wondering what they are saying. Anyone else?
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Fickle_Pickle
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker
Joined: Nov 01, 2005
Age: 18
Posts: 66
Location: California, USA
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| Posted: Wed Nov 02, 2005 12:13 am Post subject: |
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I used to when I was 12 (which was 3 years ago). I couldn't talk to people and my sisters (who I REALLY hated then) kept pointing it out to me, which would get on my nerves. 
Eventually, I got over it. I'm still a little shy, but it hasn't been a major social phobia ever since. |
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WooYayHooplah
Phoenix
Joined: Jun 14, 2005
Age: 32
Posts: 1012
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| Posted: Wed Nov 02, 2005 11:48 am Post subject: |
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Probably everyone on this forum... hehe
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KenM
Phoenix
Joined: Oct 16, 2005
Age: 40
Posts: 627
Location: Mass. USA
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| Posted: Wed Nov 02, 2005 4:57 pm Post subject: |
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I would not call mine a phobia. But I don't fel the need to socialize, make useless small talk, pretend to hold intrest that you could care less about. So I only do it when I have a real intrest in it. Why spend time doing thing you don't like doing when you don't have to?
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Last edited by KenM on Wed Nov 02, 2005 6:28 pm; edited 1 time in total |
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en_una_isla
Queen of the Nile
Joined: Nov 01, 2005
Posts: 2862
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| Posted: Wed Nov 02, 2005 5:19 pm Post subject: |
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| KenM wrote: | | make usless small talk, |
Even when I was a bit more social than I am now, or at least less asocial than I am now, I found small talk physically painful to attempt. I am wholly incapable of it.
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Cassidys
Tufted Titmouse
Joined: Nov 02, 2005
Posts: 35
Location: Huntington Beach
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| Posted: Wed Nov 02, 2005 5:51 pm Post subject: |
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| I do it, sometimes I just think deeply about the person im about to interact with, I think to myself, "This is a person, they are human just like me, they are not better then me, they are just living their life just as I am." You really gotta think that, sometimes it makes my interactions with people a lot smoother. |
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pernicious_penguin
Pileated woodpecker
Joined: Sep 02, 2005
Posts: 183
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| Posted: Wed Nov 02, 2005 7:23 pm Post subject: |
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| I have some of the same problems you specified |
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CRACK
Phoenix
Joined: Nov 03, 2005
Age: 21
Posts: 806
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| Posted: Thu Nov 03, 2005 7:16 am Post subject: |
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| yes I do. I don't answer the phone. I only answer the door if I'm the only one in the house, and I never leave the house by myself. |
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Scoots5012
Senior Member
Joined: Jul 02, 2004
Age: 28
Posts: 2250
Location: Cheyenne Wyoming
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| Posted: Thu Nov 03, 2005 10:36 am Post subject: |
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I hate lines and crowds. Too many people around to make me feel comfortable - Plus bad memories of what happened to me in the past while amongst a crowd in the school setting.
I hate the phone too. More bad memories of the phones. Although I can't pinpoint anything that may have given me a phobia of the phone, if I have to call someone, often I feel like I'm going to have a panic attack.
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GrayDiamond
Butterfly
Joined: Nov 03, 2005
Posts: 15
Location: Bloomington, Indiana/Compton, California
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| Posted: Thu Nov 03, 2005 9:55 pm Post subject: Phobias |
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I was just thinking to myself that I'm paranoid. Then I went and did more research on this disorder and it seems that there are a few similarities, though I may take it a little farther.
I avoid crowds as much as possible. Lines too. If I'm not bleeding out of my ears, I really don't need to stand in line. Don't talk to people at random, but I put on a good face of 'polite and normal' until I can determine someones potential as a threat. Is it normal to look at every person you see a threat? It is to me! As far as phobias go, I'm not sure I'm afraid so much as understanding all of the risks without any of the rewards.
-Editted for second thought! Go Go lysdexia!-
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ramsamsam
Deinonychus
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Joined: Oct 25, 2005
Age: 19
Posts: 363
Location: Sheringham, Norfolk, UK
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| Posted: Fri Nov 04, 2005 7:09 am Post subject: |
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I have a phobia of eating certain foods unless I can wash myself. Like crisps and the like.
Crowds make me feel so akward.
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eyeenteepee
Velociraptor
Joined: Aug 25, 2005
Posts: 488
Location: UK
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| Posted: Fri Nov 04, 2005 8:39 am Post subject: |
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Yep, diagnosed with social phobia years ago. I used to have massive panic attacks before any social occaision for a couple of years.
A combination of therapy and avoidance works for me.
Even so, I tend to prefer dealing with companies or people via email if I can, failing that the phone isn't so bad (no body language issues). Face-to-face stuff is the last resort for me.
I recommend learning a few techniques to control anxiety (lots of good books out there) if you feel it's getting to be a problem for you.
Councilling can help, as can appropiate medication prescribed by a doctor.
*edit: after doing all of the above I still have issues that aren't going away, but reducing the anxeity was a major acheivement for me and has made the most difference - I still hate social gatherings, but tolerate them more than I did!*
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ramsamsam
Deinonychus
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Joined: Oct 25, 2005
Age: 19
Posts: 363
Location: Sheringham, Norfolk, UK
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| Posted: Fri Nov 04, 2005 8:46 am Post subject: |
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People always say i'm a nervous person. I jump at loud sounds and over the top hand movments.
I have difficulty with walking through town at certain times in the day.
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My chest is aching, burns like a furnace that burning keeps me alive.
I'm a tumbler, born under punches.
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Maerlyn138
Butterfly
Joined: Nov 03, 2005
Posts: 12
Location: San Antonio
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| Posted: Fri Nov 04, 2005 1:07 pm Post subject: Not too bad, just get nervous |
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| I think I have learned to cope over the years (i'n 33), now I just avoid certain situations. I used to like going to bars when I was younger and try to meet people, but I found that even if I was able to get into a conversation, I usually didn't like the person or really care to have them around. It gets lonely, because a part of me wants to have friends and do stuff. but the big part of me just wants to sit here and watch cartoons and yell at comercials. |
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lazy-Jane
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker
Joined: Oct 20, 2005
Posts: 54
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| Posted: Thu Nov 10, 2005 3:48 am Post subject: Re: Not too bad, just get nervous |
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| Maerlyn138 wrote: | | watch cartoons and yell at comercials. |
I like yelling at commercials, they dont yell back
Im afraid of talking on the phone most of the time, unless its my family. Even then I sometimes get nervous about having to call. I ussualy have to work myself up to being able to call anyone I need to call. I call to schedule a ride to work at least 3 times a week, have been for past year, yet everytime I do, I get nervous about doing so. I acctuly find I prefer face-to-face interactions more then the phone. I'd rather see the person Im talking to. I got a cell phone out of nessicity of having a phone around, though very rarly use it. It's eaiser to explain my lack of interest in being involved in social settings on my shyness then any of the many phobias I have. It's genneraly accepted better to be shy then afraid. |
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