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anna-banana
and yet it moves!
Joined: Aug 31, 2008
Age: 25
Posts: 1728
Location: Europe
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 Posted: Sun Sep 07, 2008 11:40 am Post subject: funny NT overinterpreting stories |
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I was at my friends wedding last weekend and spoke to a mate whom I haven't seen in a while. I asked him if he was coming to the garden afterparty the next day. he said he couldn't leave his baby daughter alone at home and wasn't sure if he wanted to bring her over to which I said- hey I have the same problem, I don't wanna leave my dog at home so I might have to take him with me.
his response- are you comparing my daughter to a DOG?
at that point I just laughed. how the heck did he get that from what I'd said? he got obviously offended so we didn't talk much after that. such misunderstandings used to bother me a lot, now I just find them extermely funny.
another one from a few days ago:
talking to my female friend. she says she needs to cut down on drinking cause she heard that women shouldn't drink more than 14 units of alcohol per week and she definately was drinking more than that. to which I say that actually, I heard it also depends on your weight. friend: "are you calling me fat?!"
wtf?!!
do you guys get that too? I bet you do. come on, I want to hear some stories!  |
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JohnHopkins
In no way offensive to anybody. Honest.
Joined: Nov 20, 2007
Age: 20
Posts: 2059
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| Posted: Sun Sep 07, 2008 11:44 am Post subject: |
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| That thing about the guy's daughter is amusing, but, while it is funny, finding it funny when you offend someone isn't a great attitude to have. ESPECIALLY when it comes to women thinking you're calling them fat. |
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anna-banana
and yet it moves!
Joined: Aug 31, 2008
Age: 25
Posts: 1728
Location: Europe
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| Posted: Sun Sep 07, 2008 11:52 am Post subject: |
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yeah I know what you mean, but I hope that they see that I only laugh because the overinterpretation just seems so far-fetched to me and that I don't do it in a mean way ;p
I often find laughing a good way to get out of this. not everybody has a sense of humour about themselves tho... |
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Greentea
Bull in China Shop par Excellence!
Joined: Jun 15, 2007
Posts: 2528
Location: Middle East
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| Posted: Sun Sep 07, 2008 11:55 am Post subject: |
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Sounds like the kind of comments I make that get me in trouble with people. I'll say something perfectly logical that fits the conversation, but I never have that intuition that tells you in no time that something is better left unsaid considering who you are talking to.
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"It is the wounded oyster that mends its shell with pearl" - Ralph Waldo Emerson |
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lionesss
The Queen of not your typical kind of jungle
Joined: Aug 22, 2008
Age: 33
Posts: 1013
Location: not anywhere near you
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| Posted: Sun Sep 07, 2008 12:25 pm Post subject: |
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It explains why on almost every other forum I have visited I was accused of being a troll when I never intended to cause problems in the first place 
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I was told that I have PDD-NOS and ADHD- in other words, mild AS with a history of speech delay. I personally think its best to say that I am just plain under the spectrum! |
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Magnus
Phoenix
Joined: Jul 25, 2008
Age: 33
Posts: 784
Location: Southern California
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| Posted: Sun Sep 07, 2008 12:27 pm Post subject: |
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I can totally relate to this. You should keep track of these conversations and write them down so we can have a good laugh about it.
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"Blessed are they who suffer many experiences, for they shall be made perfect through suffering: they shall be as the angels of God in heaven and die no more, neither shall they be born anymore, for death and birth have no more dominion over them.&am |
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sinsboldly
Free Range Aspie
Joined: Nov 22, 2006
Age: 57
Posts: 8059
Location: Oregon, USA
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| Posted: Sun Sep 07, 2008 12:38 pm Post subject: |
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yeah, it is never a good idea to laugh at anything when someone suggests they have been insulted. They just don't see it the way we do, and it behooves us to at least let things drop when we notice we have (as I call it) hit a clinker.
also, saying 'oh, I see how that could be misinterpreted, sorry, no I didn't think _________ fill in the blank." Goes a LONG way.
finding a connection with people is tricky. Seeing how you both had responsibilities was the connection you had in common. That was clever to note, and saying 'yes, I know what you mean about having responsibilities" would have been easier for the other guy to digest.
however if someone gets on my bad side, I can use my pointed logic and blunt honesty to completely devistate someone. I try not to, though. It really isn't fair.
Merle
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I freed thousands of slaves; I could have freed more if they knew they were slaves.
-Harriet Tubman |
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sartresue
Radical Aspergian
Joined: Dec 19, 2007
Posts: 2282
Location: The Castle of Shock and Awe-tism
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| Posted: Sun Sep 07, 2008 2:16 pm Post subject: |
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Comparison of life forms topic
Cannot compare a dog to a kid. This is why I have no patience with people who talk about their pets as if they are children. Pets are infinitely easier to deal with than kids, and I ought to know, as I have been a parent and a pet owner each for 35 years.
I am not comparing them, just making an observation about needs. Some people are very attached to their pets. (I currently have two dogs and a cat, and I love them dearly.)
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Radical Aspergian
Awe-Tistic Whirlwind
Phuture Phounder of the Philosophy Phactory |
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Callista
Phoenix
Joined: Feb 04, 2006
Age: 25
Posts: 1663
Location: Central USA
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| Posted: Sun Sep 07, 2008 2:42 pm Post subject: |
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Wow... how sensitive can you get?! I don't understand them sometimes... why does an NT, with all that social savvy, not know you don't mean that their daughter is somehow a dog?
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Female. Engineering student. Gamer. Christian. Asexual. Information Addict. Deal with it!
Reports from a Resident Alien:
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MR
Deinonychus
Joined: Jun 25, 2008
Age: 39
Posts: 392
Location: USA
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| Posted: Sun Sep 07, 2008 2:53 pm Post subject: |
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| On the alcohol thing, one could point out that it's lean body mass that makes a difference. |
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anna-banana
and yet it moves!
Joined: Aug 31, 2008
Age: 25
Posts: 1728
Location: Europe
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| Posted: Sun Sep 07, 2008 3:29 pm Post subject: |
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| yeah, I sometimes suspect that NTs project evil intentions on everybody around them... hopefully thats not the case (oversensitive over kids/weight maybe??) |
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MR
Deinonychus
Joined: Jun 25, 2008
Age: 39
Posts: 392
Location: USA
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| Posted: Sun Sep 07, 2008 4:00 pm Post subject: |
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| I find it frustrating when people read things into what I say that I didn't say, didn't mean, didn't think. And there's no way for me to predict it. One wouldn't think a straightforward statement would be hard to understand, but some folks seem to have troubles with such statements. Thankfully, I also know plenty of people who know I say what I mean. |
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JohnHopkins
In no way offensive to anybody. Honest.
Joined: Nov 20, 2007
Age: 20
Posts: 2059
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| Posted: Sun Sep 07, 2008 4:37 pm Post subject: |
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| Callista wrote: | | Wow... how sensitive can you get?! I don't understand them sometimes... why does an NT, with all that social savvy, not know you don't mean that their daughter is somehow a dog? |
People get very sensitive, especially about their kids. |
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Electric_Kite
Toucan
Joined: Aug 21, 2008
Age: 33
Posts: 268
Location: crashing to the ground
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| Posted: Sun Sep 07, 2008 6:04 pm Post subject: |
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People are awfully sensitive about their dogs, too. I upset some guy that I quite liked, by calling his dog 'it.' I call my cats 'it' more often than 'she.'
Once, working for the vet, I interposed myself between two dogs who were starting to fight in the waiting room. Leading the instigator and its owner away I remarked, sympathetically I thought, that it's very difficult to socialize terrier-breed dogs like that one to not be aggressive to other dogs, especially as the developmental window-of-opportunity for that occurs before the puppy is fully vaccinated and can safely meet strange dogs. The man complained to my boss, who upbraided me for criticising the clients.
Here's a prime one: I was in the dispensary, counting out antibiotic tablets. My boss the vet wanders by and says, "I was on that antibiotic once." I replied, "I certainly hope not, this one isn't approved for humans, it makes some people go blind. You were probably on," and named another, very similar antibiotic that is used in humans. It took about two days before she stopped acting angry to me. I still don't understand why anybody would consider this a breach of 'proper' social-rank-behavior and find it offensive instead of being happy that I knew something about the drugs we used. Madness. |
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anna-banana
and yet it moves!
Joined: Aug 31, 2008
Age: 25
Posts: 1728
Location: Europe
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| Posted: Sun Sep 07, 2008 6:33 pm Post subject: |
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| Electric_Kite wrote: |
Here's a prime one: I was in the dispensary, counting out antibiotic tablets. My boss the vet wanders by and says, "I was on that antibiotic once." I replied, "I certainly hope not, this one isn't approved for humans, it makes some people go blind. You were probably on," and named another, very similar antibiotic that is used in humans. It took about two days before she stopped acting angry to me. I still don't understand why anybody would consider this a breach of 'proper' social-rank-behavior and find it offensive instead of being happy that I knew something about the drugs we used. Madness. |
I read your post twice and still don't find that offending... you mean she thought you were all "I know better than you"? |
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