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Jkid
Sea Gull
Joined: Jan 20, 2008
Posts: 212
Location: College Park,MD
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 Posted: Wed Sep 10, 2008 9:43 pm Post subject: Middle school socialization. |
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When I was at middle school I was quickly became an outcast for wearing a pokemon themed bookbag.
But I kept asking myself for years, how are middle schoolers socialize with one another?
How are able to follow fashion and fads, how do they become popular? How are middle schoolers suddenly discover how to use coarse language against one another? Why do middle schoolers suddenly watch shows and listen to music that are too young for them?
Why do they persecute anyone who does not conform to their definition of "normal"? How do middle schoolers be normal?
If this question is at the wrong forum, please move it. |
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schleppenheimer
Phoenix
Joined: Sep 01, 2006
Posts: 970
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| Posted: Wed Sep 10, 2008 11:05 pm Post subject: |
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Most middle school children are the spawn of adults who could care less about them, and don't provide training that would prevent them from acting horrible to others. For some odd reason, it is at precisely this stage in life when a child's lack of direction by parents shows itself to the world. On the other hand, the few kids who are nice and actually have parents who REQUIRE them to be nice and behave appropriately towards others are the very kids who are tormented.
I was never more surprised than when we moved to Utah when my oldest son (probably on the spectrum, but never diagnosed) hit middle school age, and the move was GOOD for him because the particular school he attended concentrated more on the kids behaving nicely to each other rather than concentrating on academics. Then, we moved back to Pittsburgh, where we had previously lived, and my social butterfly, easily popular NT daughter hit middle school, and purely because she was NICE, she had a horrible time in middle school.
I'm grateful that my 12 year old, who is now currently in middle school, seems to be oblivious to all of this behavior that goes on at his school. I am guessing that he is "above the fray." He's just too innocent to notice the ugliness that occurs. Thank heavens. |
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Warsie
OG Balla Representin' Da Souf Sydeeee of Chi-City
Joined: Apr 04, 2008
Age: 17
Posts: 1634
Location: Chicago, IL, USA
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| Posted: Mon Sep 15, 2008 6:39 pm Post subject: Re: Middle school socialization. |
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| Jkid wrote: | | When I was at middle school I was quickly became an outcast for wearing a pokemon themed bookbag. |
odd. In my Gramamr School people wore pokemon bags, etc and didn't get involved into that.
| Quote: | | How are able to follow fashion and fads, |
they watch videos, TV (MTV and BET for examples) and they have the internet to look up this stuff, how soem trends go now
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how do they become popular? |
i DUNNO LOLZ
| Quote: | | How are middle schoolers suddenly discover how to use coarse language against one another? |
probably older siblings, parents, TV, etc.
| Quote: | | Why do middle schoolers suddenly watch shows and listen to music that are too young for them? |
I really find it odd that shows would be too 'young' for middle schoolers 
| Quote: | Why do they persecute anyone who does not conform to their definition of "normal"? How do middle schoolers be normal?
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IIRC it's REAL bad in suburban schools based off what I heard from others.
_________________
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9/11 was an inside job
http://www.911truth.org/
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SPCDavid
Raven
Joined: Sep 09, 2008
Posts: 115
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| Posted: Thu Sep 18, 2008 1:36 pm Post subject: |
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| It's just a case of group think, it's some of these kid's first encountter with popularity and when some kids see the drive for acceptance, they follow suite. It gets to the point where anyone behind the curve gets ridiculed just so some of the social stragglers can hang on. I was just about the least popular guy in middle school, I was bullied without mercy. After awhile I started to pick on less popular kids and wasn't as ridiculed afterwards. All I can say is that my kids are going to a private school when they reach adolesence, when you consider the cost of your middle school education versus the actual benefits, it just iisn't worth it. |
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Hbomb89
Blue Jay
Joined: Sep 18, 2008
Age: 19
Posts: 85
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| Posted: Thu Sep 18, 2008 7:12 pm Post subject: |
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You just gotta keep a stiff upper lip...or try to. Make no mistake, having aspergers means you will have an at least decently high chance of being singled out
Kids with aspergers will usually, if not always exhibit traits and interests that will be deemed "abnormal" to the typical adolescent...such as having interests in esoteric things, anime, TV shows like Transformers or Avatar: The Last Airbender, or still carrying interests in stuff like Pokemon, Yugioh and you WILL be made fun of for those things.
Believe me, I know how it is. Some girls were repulsed by me because I didn't like the popular music of 2001-2004. I was called poor because I didn't wear name brands like FUBU, Abercrombie and Fitch, Hollister or Hot Topic. Even goth kids poked fun at me. If you were in the special school district, even just for resource (I.E.P talk for study hall), you would never dare give that away if you didn't want to be ridiculed and labeled as a retard. (In fact, even as you go into high school where peers are more understanding and empathetic, you still shouldn't give that information away for confidentiality reasons).
You shouldn't give up your individuality, but it is most wise to correct some of your socially abnormal behaviors associated with Aspergers and autism. during your middle school and early high school years. Learning more acceptable behaviors will not only save your face in the student body, but also will help you in the long run in getting hired for jobs and communicating with other people as adults. |
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Jkid
Sea Gull
Joined: Jan 20, 2008
Posts: 212
Location: College Park,MD
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| Posted: Thu Sep 18, 2008 10:29 pm Post subject: |
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| Hbomb89 wrote: | Kids with aspergers will usually, if not always exhibit traits and interests that will be deemed "abnormal" to the typical adolescent...such as having interests in esoteric things, anime, TV shows like Transformers or Avatar: The Last Airbender, or still carrying interests in stuff like Pokemon, Yugioh...
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Then what are traits and interests that are deemed "normal" to the typical adolescent? |
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Hbomb89
Blue Jay
Joined: Sep 18, 2008
Age: 19
Posts: 85
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| Posted: Thu Sep 18, 2008 10:38 pm Post subject: |
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| Jkid wrote: | | Hbomb89 wrote: | Kids with aspergers will usually, if not always exhibit traits and interests that will be deemed "abnormal" to the typical adolescent...such as having interests in esoteric things, anime, TV shows like Transformers or Avatar: The Last Airbender, or still carrying interests in stuff like Pokemon, Yugioh...
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Then what are traits and interests that are deemed "normal" to the typical adolescent? |
Listening to pop music or gangsta rap (...yep, racket like that passes for "music" nowadays). Wearing brand name clothing, or trying to. Having a lot of interests in sports, or people don't like sports, they'll pretent to be interested in them. Junior high is rough place for an individual who doesn't try to fit in with the "in" crowd. But once middle school is over, it's off to a better place with you. (High school is MUCH better than middle school, trust me on this.) |
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Jkid
Sea Gull
Joined: Jan 20, 2008
Posts: 212
Location: College Park,MD
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| Posted: Thu Sep 18, 2008 10:50 pm Post subject: |
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| Hbomb89 wrote: |
Listening to pop music or gangsta rap (...yep, racket like that passes for "music" nowadays). Wearing brand name clothing, or trying to. Having a lot of interests in sports, or people don't like sports, they'll pretent to be interested in them. Junior high is rough place for an individual who doesn't try to fit in with the "in" crowd. But once middle school is over, it's off to a better place with you. (High school is MUCH better than middle school, trust me on this.) |
But what television programs, what do they watch,? They definitely do not watch PBS but there parents would not let them watch more mature rated programs (read=TV-14) And I bet they don't play video games because they think it's "nerdy".
And again with the brand name clothes it just proves that in order truly fit in you have to have money or beg your parents to buy you name brand clothing.
As for high school: In my experience, it's just as worst in high school. The only true place where people would be better off is at college/university. |
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Warsie
OG Balla Representin' Da Souf Sydeeee of Chi-City
Joined: Apr 04, 2008
Age: 17
Posts: 1634
Location: Chicago, IL, USA
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| Posted: Fri Sep 19, 2008 1:56 pm Post subject: |
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quote="Hbomb89"]Kids with aspergers will usually, if not always exhibit traits and interests that will be deemed "abnormal" to the typical adolescent...such as having interests in esoteric things, anime, TV shows like Transformers or Avatar: The Last Airbender, or still carrying interests in stuff like Pokemon, Yugioh...
[/quote]
erm...in my High School there was an unofficial Anime Club that did Yu-Gi-Oh trading duels.....even one of the more socially-knowlegeable debaters from debate team occasionally was in it and some other decently 'popular' people.
There was also asmall group of people who had DA accounts, drew and watched Anime, were okay with furries, knew about chans, etc
_________________
I am a Star Wars Fan, Warsie here.
9/11 was an inside job
http://www.911truth.org/
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Warsie
OG Balla Representin' Da Souf Sydeeee of Chi-City
Joined: Apr 04, 2008
Age: 17
Posts: 1634
Location: Chicago, IL, USA
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| Posted: Fri Sep 19, 2008 1:57 pm Post subject: |
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| Hbomb89 wrote: | | If you were in the special school district, even just for resource (I.E.P talk for study hall), you would never dare give that away if you didn't want to be ridiculed and labeled as a retard. (In fact, even as you go into high school where peers are more understanding and empathetic, you still shouldn't give that information away for confidentiality reasons). |
people thought I was a smart-ass and 1337 because I had resource
_________________
I am a Star Wars Fan, Warsie here.
9/11 was an inside job
http://www.911truth.org/
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Warsie
OG Balla Representin' Da Souf Sydeeee of Chi-City
Joined: Apr 04, 2008
Age: 17
Posts: 1634
Location: Chicago, IL, USA
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| Posted: Fri Sep 19, 2008 1:59 pm Post subject: |
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[quote="Jkid"They definitely do not watch PBS but there parents would not let them watch more mature rated programs (read=TV-14) And I bet they don't play video games because they think it's "nerdy".[/quote]
they do play video games, a LOT of them. Gaming is pretty popular now among young males! It might be console gaming more likely or sports, etc but it's there
| Quote: | | And again with the brand name clothes it just proves that in order truly fit in you have to have money or beg your parents to buy you name brand clothing. |
didnt have that problem; I wore machanics jackets and welders jackets and they didn't atttack me. then my school was small and in the city (~600 students) so different than suburbs
_________________
I am a Star Wars Fan, Warsie here.
9/11 was an inside job
http://www.911truth.org/
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Hbomb89
Blue Jay
Joined: Sep 18, 2008
Age: 19
Posts: 85
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| Posted: Fri Sep 19, 2008 3:07 pm Post subject: |
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| Warsie wrote: |
erm...in my High School there was an unofficial Anime Club that did Yu-Gi-Oh trading duels.....even one of the more socially-knowlegeable debaters from debate team occasionally was in it and some other decently 'popular' people.
There was also asmall group of people who had DA accounts, drew and watched Anime, were okay with furries, knew about chans, etc |
That's HIGH school pal, once you get into high school people become more open minded and gain better reasoning skills and are less likely to make tease you about "nerdy" interests. I never had much social problems in high school. There was an Anime club and an Asian culture club (I was a proud regular member of Club Asia) in my high school. I didn't know much people with deviant art except for this one Japanese kid I know from resource who was really into anime, gundams and large cats (such as lions, tigers, leopards, cheetahs, panthers, ext)...he was pretty crazy though, he would tell me all sorts of fallicious stuff about Japan having a superior military to the US as well as Japan having underground military bases
yep...he watched way too much Neon Genesis...
I was talking middle school. Unlike High school, I didn't enjoy middle school much.
and gaming is popular among everyone. It depends on the game though, just about everyone plays Halo, Grand Theft Auto and Super Smash bros. Aspies tend to be open and more discriminating when it comes video game genres. Me, I'm a huge fan of RTS (older pre-Generals Command & Conquer games most specifically), some turn based and I play my fair share of simulators (Sim City 3000, Sim Tower and Yoot Tower) |
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Jkid
Sea Gull
Joined: Jan 20, 2008
Posts: 212
Location: College Park,MD
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| Posted: Sun Sep 21, 2008 4:07 pm Post subject: |
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| Oh come on, there's got to be plenty of aspies who know the realities of middle schools. Any professional opinions? |
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