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gsilver
Phoenix
Joined: Apr 21, 2006
Posts: 533
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 Posted: Thu Sep 18, 2008 3:20 am Post subject: Insomnia is hell |
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It's dark
You are alone
You are in pain
Your head hurts
Every little sound is magnified to the point that even things that should be small sounds send waves of pain through your body
Every negative emotion in your body, even those that you didn't know you had, come bursting out
You have two thoughts, and only two thoughts: 'I want to sleep' and 'I want to die'.
Looking to the future, all you see is a horrible dead-end job preventing you from sleeping in the daytime, and a horrible environment preventing you from sleeping in the night time.
You again think of death. What a wonderful release it must be. To die is to rest.
Your eves feel pain
Your ears feel pain
Your head feels pain
Your chest feels pain
Your bones feel pain
To die is nothingness. Nothingness is wonderful. In nothingness, there is no pain.
Non-existence is the release from hell.
You question why you ever came here. Things were better before, even if for but a fleeting moment.
You stare at the clock. Time continues to flow.
You want to sleep and be done with this horrible night
You want to be done with the horrible next day so that you can get home from your horrible job to face another horrible night... and then you wonder what's the point
You want to die
All you have is your solitude and your pain
You want to die
You want to die
Die
Die
...
...
...
...
_________________
Did the post you just read not contain bitching about sleep? Congratulations, you're a winner! |
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Jaysonlee4
Snowy Owl
Joined: Aug 23, 2008
Posts: 138
Location: Colorado
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| Posted: Thu Sep 18, 2008 4:27 am Post subject: Re: Insomnia is hell |
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| gsilver wrote: | It's dark
You are alone
You are in pain
Your head hurts
Every little sound is magnified to the point that even things that should be small sounds send waves of pain through your body
Every negative emotion in your body, even those that you didn't know you had, come bursting out
You have two thoughts, and only two thoughts: 'I want to sleep' and 'I want to die'.
Looking to the future, all you see is a horrible dead-end job preventing you from sleeping in the daytime, and a horrible environment preventing you from sleeping in the night time.
You again think of death. What a wonderful release it must be. To die is to rest.
Your eves feel pain
Your ears feel pain
Your head feels pain
Your chest feels pain
Your bones feel pain
To die is nothingness. Nothingness is wonderful. In nothingness, there is no pain.
Non-existence is the release from hell.
You question why you ever came here. Things were better before, even if for but a fleeting moment.
You stare at the clock. Time continues to flow.
You want to sleep and be done with this horrible night
You want to be done with the horrible next day so that you can get home from your horrible job to face another horrible night... and then you wonder what's the point
You want to die
All you have is your solitude and your pain
You want to die
You want to die
Die
Die
...
...
...
... |
wow, you were able to express in words basically how I feel....now just add things about routine being destroyed, being stuck in hotel for 3 days going on 4 with no sleep, and 2 seizures today and youll have it totally.
_________________
I found him...I have Jesus in the trunk of my car.
-"It's not that I want to kill Lois...It's just.....:sigh: I want her not to be alive,,,anymore." Stewie Griffin-
NT's are people too...well some of them.
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Tim_Tex
WP's Resident Simpsons and South Park Aficionado
Joined: Jul 03, 2004
Age: 28
Posts: 22319
Location: San Marcos, Texas
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| Posted: Thu Sep 18, 2008 4:31 am Post subject: |
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That's me in a nutshell.
_________________
When you need something, that's a responsibility, that only an adult...of my maturity...Bunnies!!!
~Meatwad, Aqua Teen Hunger Force |
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Magliabechi
Raven
Joined: Oct 10, 2007
Age: 33
Posts: 120
Location: England
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| Posted: Fri Sep 19, 2008 7:43 pm Post subject: |
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I listen to the radio when I can't sleep- at least it takes my mind off not being able to sleep.
Magliabechi. |
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preludeman
Velociraptor
Joined: May 22, 2007
Age: 38
Posts: 476
Location: In my inner sanctum of solitude.
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| Posted: Fri Sep 19, 2008 9:11 pm Post subject: Part of AS |
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Insomnia is a part of AS. You may want to listen to the radio as someone suggested , or read a book. You may want to talk to a doctor about it. I try to clear my mind or read. I hope this helps.
_________________
Do what you can when you can. I'm also the "alien"they are looking for. |
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lionesss
The Queen of not your typical kind of jungle
Joined: Aug 22, 2008
Age: 33
Posts: 1013
Location: not anywhere near you
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| Posted: Fri Sep 19, 2008 11:35 pm Post subject: |
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I feel for you, this is why I have to go on sleeping pills. If I don't have my sleeping pills, I cannot sleep. And if I don't get my sleep I get VERY cranky!
_________________
I was told that I have PDD-NOS and ADHD- in other words, mild AS with a history of speech delay. I personally think its best to say that I am just plain under the spectrum! |
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kip
Phoenix
Joined: Mar 14, 2007
Age: 21
Posts: 752
Location: Las Vegas NV USA
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| Posted: Sat Sep 20, 2008 12:27 am Post subject: |
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I thought I had insomnia for the longest time. I felt exactly like you. Then, I stayed home while everyone else went on a week long holiday. I found out then that I naturally have a 36 hour internal clock. I'm happiest when I sleep for 12 hours and am awake for 24. I'm also my healthiest. However, planet earth has this annoying tendency to not cater to that, so I miss every third night or so of sleep completely, and miss parts of the other nights. It sucks, but I'm far less cranky now that I understand the reason.
You should consider that there is some sort of biological quirk that makes it impossible to sleep. Also, try making a bed routine you do every night, even if it's as simple as moving a particular book to a particular spot. Aspies are creatures of habit, so this habit may help.
_________________
The two loudest sounds in the world are a click when you should hear a bang, and a bang when you should hear a click.
You can purchase anything off the Internet except common sense.
LEAVE ME ALONE!!! Argh!!!  -- Brought to you by NaNoWriMo brain |
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rossc
Deinonychus
Joined: May 02, 2007
Age: 37
Posts: 318
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| Posted: Sat Sep 20, 2008 3:21 am Post subject: |
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| Feel for you. Yeah I periodically have cycles of insomnia. It is crap and I don't know how else to explain it. You did a great job yourself in doing so. I don't know why or when abut I do suffer and it is horrible. I usually get 5 hours or so a night which is fine |
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CockneyRebel
Sid The Love Rat is a Sweet Pea :O)
Joined: Jul 18, 2004
Age: 34
Posts: 21088
Location: Out in the evening, with me two best Rat Mates :O)
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| Posted: Wed Sep 24, 2008 2:27 am Post subject: |
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I'm getting a taste of it, tonight and it's not very pleasant. I know that I'll sleep well, tomorrow night.
_________________
Sid The Rat is everything that I stand for. We're both large, proud Punkers with Cockney accents. We both have the same issues, as well. I don't see anything wrong, with that. I was put on this planet, to make myself happy. Sid :O) |
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gsilver
Phoenix
Joined: Apr 21, 2006
Posts: 533
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| Posted: Fri Oct 03, 2008 9:59 am Post subject: |
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Well, I can safely say that after 8 months of sleep disruption, I've finally figured out how to get enough sleep: go to bed at 10:00 every night.
If I can sleep through people being up and making noise for 2 hours when they're normally up, and don't make a racket after midnight, and the sprinklers don't wake me up at 5:00, I can sleep until 6:00 and wake up naturally instead of being jolted awake by the stomping around of the 300 pound man who lives upstairs.
If you have ANY KIND of sound sensitivity, NEVER move to the SF Bay area. Housing is so expensive (limiting you to roommate situations) and buildings tend to be so old and poorly constructed (so that anything even remotely affordable is shoddily constructed with thin walls) that you'll fall apart from broken/little sleep.
In addition to the 8 months of disrupted sleep, my brain is still recovering from a month of Provigil use, which I was prescribed after the narcolepsy diagnosis (which I was pressured into seeking by my boss). THAT STUFF is horrible. Thank god for the ADA, or I would still need to be on it (they can't fire me for falling asleep because of the diagnosis).
I've had a constant headache since discontinuing it about 2 months ago, and still CRASH nearly every night.
_________________
Did the post you just read not contain bitching about sleep? Congratulations, you're a winner! |
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patternist
Stirring the pot....
Joined: Jul 29, 2008
Age: 35
Posts: 1833
Location: wouldn't you like to know?
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| Posted: Fri Oct 03, 2008 10:08 am Post subject: |
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insomnia is hell, I've suffered with it for years.
Do you like cats? My cat is the best natural medicine, he curls up in my armpit and purrs away all the internal and external noises.
Failing that, I would recommend Ambien or Doxylamine succinate (OTC) if you don't want to see a doctor. |
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Prof_Pretorius
troubled Soul
Joined: Aug 21, 2006
Age: 50
Posts: 4915
Location: Hiding in the attic of the Arkham Library
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| Posted: Fri Oct 03, 2008 12:12 pm Post subject: |
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| lionesss wrote: | | I feel for you, this is why I have to go on sleeping pills. If I don't have my sleeping pills, I cannot sleep. And if I don't get my sleep I get VERY cranky! |
I used to sleep quite soundly, but now I have to take some meds to get any rest.
_________________
I wake to sleep, and take my waking slow. I feel my fate in what I cannot fear. I learn by going where I have to go. ~Theodore Roethke |
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Tohlagos
Phoenix
Joined: Apr 26, 2008
Age: 37
Posts: 954
Location: Boise, ID
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| Posted: Fri Oct 03, 2008 12:19 pm Post subject: |
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| gsilver wrote: | Well, I can safely say that after 8 months of sleep disruption, I've finally figured out how to get enough sleep: go to bed at 10:00 every night.
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Glad you figured it out. I've been trying herbal remedies with some success.
_________________
To fear change is meaningless, for change will still come regardless of one's personal desire. Remember your allies of hope, patience, and perseverance well, for they will standby you to the completion.
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lionesss
The Queen of not your typical kind of jungle
Joined: Aug 22, 2008
Age: 33
Posts: 1013
Location: not anywhere near you
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| Posted: Fri Oct 03, 2008 5:37 pm Post subject: |
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| Tohlagos wrote: |
Glad you figured it out. I've been trying herbal remedies with some success. |
What are you taking?
_________________
I was told that I have PDD-NOS and ADHD- in other words, mild AS with a history of speech delay. I personally think its best to say that I am just plain under the spectrum! |
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lexis
Raven
Joined: Sep 28, 2008
Age: 18
Posts: 106
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| Posted: Fri Oct 03, 2008 5:40 pm Post subject: |
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Ever heard of 'brain stew' by Green day? That pretty much sums it up, insomnia ain't nice; ever been in that nasty little place where you are too tired to get up but too anxious to sleep? I usually try to keep a regular night time routine for at least five days a week and it helps. Sometimes I try to 'anchor' my thoughts by focusing on a set of words or verse.
Anybody get sleep-paralysis or false awakenings? I get them when my insomnia is particularly bad, used to have lucid dreams but not so much anymore. |
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