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Irulan
The Borg Queen
Joined: May 18, 2007
Age: 24
Posts: 1934
Location: Poland
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 Posted: Wed Sep 24, 2008 3:21 pm Post subject: Are your parents very neurotypical? |
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My mother unfortunately embodies the worst traits of widely understood neurotypicality, having an aversion for things out of the norm - her recent "pearl of wisdom" (said in a voice expressing sincere suprise I ever would be able to think any different) is "I don't like abnormal things and it's NORMAL", even if this "abnormality" is only a small quirk of one's personality, some unusual way of perceiving things, untypical inclinations etc.
Do your parents accept your behaviours? Or are they still complaining you should change and try to adapt to the normal world more?
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Reodor_Felgen
Counting down till Castro bites the dust
Joined: Sep 29, 2007
Age: 20
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Location: Aspies for Freedom
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| Posted: Wed Sep 24, 2008 3:22 pm Post subject: |
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My father have some aspie traits, but technically, both my parents are NTs.
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Irulan
The Borg Queen
Joined: May 18, 2007
Age: 24
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Location: Poland
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Fayed
Sea Gull
Joined: Sep 25, 2007
Age: 21
Posts: 224
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| Posted: Wed Sep 24, 2008 3:28 pm Post subject: |
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| Dad has some AS traits, Mom is pretty NT, shes pretty tollerant for things "abnormal" but yea still NT. |
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demoluca
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Joined: Nov 17, 2007
Posts: 581
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| Posted: Wed Sep 24, 2008 3:29 pm Post subject: |
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I don't know. My mum and my dad both have symptoms of AS, so..Yeah.
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ChristinaCSB
Toucan
Joined: Jul 23, 2007
Age: 23
Posts: 263
Location: Lakewood, Ohio
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| Posted: Wed Sep 24, 2008 3:31 pm Post subject: |
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| Oh good thread! I think my Dad actually has AS and my mom has a couple AS traits but is definately not AS. |
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DevonB
Toucan
Joined: Mar 14, 2008
Age: 40
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| Posted: Wed Sep 24, 2008 3:49 pm Post subject: |
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I don't think that's a sign of NT personally. It sounds like someone who is extremely closed-minded and small-minded.
I have plenty of NT friends who have no problem in accepting things that aren't normal (of the norm). My partner is extremely NT, and has no problem with me or any other deviation from the norm.
Sorry about your Mom, dude. |
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zeichner
Snowy Owl
Joined: Sep 11, 2008
Age: 50
Posts: 145
Location: Minneapolis, MN
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| Posted: Wed Sep 24, 2008 3:57 pm Post subject: |
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Excellent question!
My mother is very much NT - no doubt in my mind. My father was (he's in a nursing home now & doesn't interact much) very technically oriented & would talk a lot about a limited number of topics. He was a good sport about doing social things - but my mom was the one who arranged all the social stuff & I don't think he would have been very social otherwise - but I just don't know what he would have been like without her.
They both grew up in the Depression, so any AS traits that either of them had as kids are likely to have been suppressed or re-channeled by the time they were in their 30s (when I was born.)
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Ishmael
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Joined: Jul 08, 2008
Posts: 1170
Location: Australia
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| Posted: Wed Sep 24, 2008 4:13 pm Post subject: |
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Yeah, my mother once told me to "tone it down and don't act so much like yourself".
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AnnaLemma
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Joined: Mar 16, 2008
Posts: 115
Location: Critter country
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| Posted: Wed Sep 24, 2008 4:15 pm Post subject: |
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My dad surely had AS, although he died decades before the diagnosis existed. My mom is a tolerant NT, although as a child I heard at least once a day "I shouldn't have to tell you, you should just know!" I learned early on that the correct response was not "Well, obviously I don't know, so maybe you should just tell me." We get along much better now.
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HD3H
The Lord and Master... Nemesis of DeLoreanDude
Joined: Sep 23, 2008
Age: 17
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Location: Denmark
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| Posted: Wed Sep 24, 2008 4:18 pm Post subject: |
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I think they have tried to make me more not so aspie. But in the end i dont think they succeded at least they havent tried for a long time.
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Social_Fantom
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Age: 24
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| Posted: Wed Sep 24, 2008 4:27 pm Post subject: |
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My mom has OCD but otherwise she is neurotypical. However, she is very accepted of my behaviors and is in fact the first person that told me that I may have AS.
My dad had a lot AS traits and I suspect that he had it himself. He was pretty accepting too but he died long before I found out about AS.
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Ryn
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Joined: Apr 10, 2008
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| Posted: Wed Sep 24, 2008 4:29 pm Post subject: |
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I suspect my Dad is somewhere on the spectrum, or at least has some of the traits. My Mom is NT but a very strange NT, so I never really heard that I was "odd" all that much from my parents (though I sometimes did and still do).
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ooOoOoOAnaOoOoOoo
Phoenix
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Joined: Jun 19, 2008
Posts: 1762
Location: US, midmap
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| Posted: Wed Sep 24, 2008 4:35 pm Post subject: |
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It depends on what "abnormal" is and isn't. A certain degree of disorganization and abnormality doesn't concern me. However, if it means breaking the law and going to jail or someplace worse, that bothers me.
My mother always tried to do things to change me, that and ignore my problems because she had confirmation from the folks at a health sciences center where she had me tested, that I could do damn near anything. Plus she always treated me androgynously because she is a feminist and thinks men and women are the same.
I think Men are stronger than women and I don't have the physical strength of a man. Still my mom expected me to do all the things my father would do and used me to fill that void. Not weird things, work things. I had to do all kinds of chores around the house a father would do if he lived with us.
So, I had that burden too, having to do everything growing up. Plus my mother pretending I had no problems which was a joke and everyone knows it.
Needless to say, I grew up without the gender stereotyping most get from their parents.
Even to this day I still do everything.
Is my mother very NT? Everyone in my family obsesses on social skills, talking to everyone they encounter and they know it drives me crazy. Okay. I don't mind talking to people I know are alright but I really do cringe when they have conversations with complete strangers in front of me and when they talk about how they like people so much.
My mom has really good people skills.
Last edited by ooOoOoOAnaOoOoOoo on Wed Sep 24, 2008 4:42 pm; edited 1 time in total |
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Irulan
The Borg Queen
Joined: May 18, 2007
Age: 24
Posts: 1934
Location: Poland
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| Posted: Wed Sep 24, 2008 4:39 pm Post subject: |
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| DevonB wrote: | I don't think that's a sign of NT personally. It sounds like someone who is extremely closed-minded and small-minded.
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True, mother was raised by poor, uneducated parents (gran's educational achievement was only four grades of elementary school, grandpa's only two as far as I know - before the war education wasn't compulsory) whose intellectual horizons and interests didn't step over boundaries of their village. They were really nice people, especially gran who was always spoiling me but it's everything. Mother never got out of her family's way of looking at things. She never showed any intellectual ambitions nor willingness to exert herself for understanding others' way of life.
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