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Trigger11
Shikamaru Nara
Joined: May 19, 2007
Posts: 7510
Location: Hidden Leaf Village
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 Posted: Thu Sep 11, 2008 4:33 pm Post subject: Door-to-Door Smut Peddlers |
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Today I had a couple of young men come to my door wanting to discuss scripture with me. Usually I tell such folks to go f**k themsleves. Today I simply said, "That would not be a good idea" and closed the door as they tried to start in on their sales pitch. I had noticed them earlier in my driveway reading my bumper stickers, which make it clear I have no interest in hearing such idiotic psychobabble. Plus, my neighborhood has a legally binding no solicitation policy. Next time maybe I'll have the police arrest them.
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chever
'Mud'
Joined: Aug 22, 2008
Age: 20
Posts: 1668
Location: Earth
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| Posted: Thu Sep 11, 2008 4:52 pm Post subject: |
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Show up at the door butt naked
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ToadOfSteel
Zomg Custom Rank
Joined: Sep 24, 2007
Age: 20
Posts: 3241
Location: New Jersey
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| Posted: Thu Sep 11, 2008 4:56 pm Post subject: |
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Just tell them to not make a show of their faith before men as ordered by Jesus in Matthew 6:1-18...
PS: are they mormons or JW's? |
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DNForrest
Deinonychus
Joined: Jan 19, 2008
Age: 24
Posts: 375
Location: Oregon
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| Posted: Thu Sep 11, 2008 4:59 pm Post subject: |
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| Something I've always wanted to do when we get solicitors in out neighborhood, since my front door has an decorative crystal window that you can only partially see through, walk up to the door, rack the slide on my pistol so that it's clearly visible, then open the door. Add Chever's idea of nudity to make it even more hilarious. |
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spudnik
Better Stronger Faster
Joined: Feb 20, 2008
Posts: 3960
Location: Calgary, Alberta Canada
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| Posted: Thu Sep 11, 2008 5:06 pm Post subject: |
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| I don't mind Mormons, I can't stand those JW's, I find them to be about the rudest missionary's, that have tried to peddle their crap on Christmas day at my home. |
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Fnord
Metasyntactic Variable
Joined: May 07, 2008
Posts: 5019
Location: Pantopia
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| Posted: Thu Sep 11, 2008 5:10 pm Post subject: |
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I answer the door with my 1st Edition AD&D Dungeon Master's Guide - the one with the red-skinned giant efreet holding a scimitar in one hand and a scantily-clad female victim in the other. Then I smile and say, "No thank you" and close the door.
Maniacal laughter is optional...
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DNForrest
Deinonychus
Joined: Jan 19, 2008
Age: 24
Posts: 375
Location: Oregon
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| Posted: Thu Sep 11, 2008 5:11 pm Post subject: |
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| Unfortunately they're building a new JW church right next to the neighborhood I live in, despite the universal protest of it from all of the residents. I really hope they'll at least be polite enough to not constantly berate us. |
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Orwell
Outer Party Member
Joined: Aug 09, 2007
Age: 19
Posts: 5101
Location: Room 101
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| Posted: Thu Sep 11, 2008 5:22 pm Post subject: |
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| ToadOfSteel wrote: | Just tell them to not make a show of their faith before men as ordered by Jesus in Matthew 6:1-18...
PS: are they mormons or JW's? |
Most likely JW, since they do more door-to-door stuff than the Mormons.
Now how would people react if I (a mainstream Presbyterian who subscribes to a liberal biblical interpretation) started going door-to-door trying to convert people to my beliefs? Why is it only the fringe lunatics who do this type of proselytizing?
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DNForrest
Deinonychus
Joined: Jan 19, 2008
Age: 24
Posts: 375
Location: Oregon
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Fnord
Metasyntactic Variable
Joined: May 07, 2008
Posts: 5019
Location: Pantopia
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| Posted: Thu Sep 11, 2008 5:33 pm Post subject: |
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DNForrest,
That last line...
| R*K*Milholland wrote: | | Whoa! If you're going to kill my erection, I don't think Mormonism is the religion for me! |
... is freekin P E R F E C T !
I'm gonna use it next time, but I think that I'll keep my clothes on.
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DNForrest
Deinonychus
Joined: Jan 19, 2008
Age: 24
Posts: 375
Location: Oregon
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| Posted: Thu Sep 11, 2008 5:35 pm Post subject: |
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| Or at least with your hand floating around inside a robe. |
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i_Am_andaJoy
the dischord in the thrum...
Joined: Sep 28, 2007
Age: 29
Posts: 1172
Location: Fort Lauderdale, Florida
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| Posted: Thu Sep 11, 2008 5:38 pm Post subject: Re: Door-to-Door Smut Peddlers |
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| Trigger11 wrote: | | Plus, my neighborhood has a legally binding no solicitation policy. Next time maybe I'll have the police arrest them. |
i don't think that will work. missionaries are not covered by solicitation, because they don't actually sell anything. (not in a money sense.) so they do not see "no solicting" signs as applying to them. in my experience, they will respect a "no missionaries" or a "no proselytizing" sign. i'd try that if you find them so annoying.
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legendoftheselkie
Pileated woodpecker
Joined: Jun 16, 2008
Posts: 188
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| Posted: Thu Sep 11, 2008 5:56 pm Post subject: being solicited for sects |
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| Usually I just tell them I have my own faith and I'm very happy with it, but the last time I said they could send the Williams Sisters over, I'd be happy to talk to them anytime, especially Serena. Haven't seen 'em since. |
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Phagocyte
Low-Functioning NT
Joined: Oct 16, 2007
Age: 19
Posts: 1980
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| Posted: Thu Sep 11, 2008 5:57 pm Post subject: |
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| Orwell wrote: | | Why is it only the fringe lunatics who do this type of proselytizing? |
Probably because only fringe lunatics have the arrogant sense of certainty to spread their religion like it was a product.
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LostInEmulation
Penguin
Joined: Feb 11, 2008
Posts: 1308
Location: Germany
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| Posted: Thu Sep 11, 2008 6:13 pm Post subject: |
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What do you do to get visited by JWs and Mormons so often? I'd love to meet one of them with a well enough understanding of German (alternatively English) to really discuss the things. I think if nothing else it would broaden my horizon.
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