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Rach
Tufted Titmouse
Joined: Dec 14, 2005
Posts: 30
Location: North lincolnshire
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 Posted: Mon Dec 19, 2005 7:00 pm Post subject: your normal!! |
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Do people, family members, friends etc tell you you dont have asperger's? someone with a big influence in my life is telling me i dont and as she is older i naturally want to believe her. Anyone else get told they're not?
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Serissa
Ex-Moderator
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Joined: Jul 11, 2005
Posts: 4570
Location: A DEN OF INIQUITY!!!
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| Posted: Mon Dec 19, 2005 7:04 pm Post subject: |
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| My mother and father not only think I have AS; they joke about having it, too. ((They're both very, very introverted, and have other aspects of it, too. I don't think either geniunely believe themselves to be Aspies, but they're comfortable enough to joke about it.)) |
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Endersdragon
Phoenix
Joined: Jun 14, 2005
Posts: 1666
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| Posted: Mon Dec 19, 2005 7:13 pm Post subject: |
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^ ditto, I wish they would just accept it.
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hale_bopp
Ruffle some Feathers
Joined: Nov 03, 2004
Age: 23
Posts: 6318
Location: New Zealand
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| Posted: Mon Dec 19, 2005 8:03 pm Post subject: |
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Yes, but it's not because I don't, ite because they just don't want to accept it.
Someone told me that It was all in my head. Naturally, I dumped the guy soon after, and don't talk to him anymore. |
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CRACK
Phoenix
Joined: Nov 03, 2005
Age: 21
Posts: 806
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| Posted: Mon Dec 19, 2005 8:26 pm Post subject: |
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| People don't say that I'm normal or that I'm wierd. The only words that I ever hear myself described as is Quiet or Reserved. |
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hecate
chav slayer
Joined: Jun 22, 2005
Posts: 1011
Location: norwich, UK.
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| Posted: Mon Dec 19, 2005 9:25 pm Post subject: |
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there have been two people that have suggested that my difficulties are not due to AS. one person was someone who's opinion i respected so i was really hurt by what he said, especially since he knew a lot about the AS-related difficulties i had experienced.  although he didn't actually say it, it felt like he was agreeing with all the people who have called me weird, crazy or stupid throughout my life.
with the other person, i did kind of deserve it because i was using my disorder as an excuse. what happened was, this man was trying to convince me to be his girlfriend but rather than say "i don't want to be your girlfriend because i don't find you attractive," i said "i probably wouldn't make a very good girlfriend because i have an ASD."
all the other people i have mentioned AS to have found it a helpful explanation for understanding my behaviour and communicating with me.
autism is such a huge subject that i really can't be bothered to explain it to every single person who asks me why i don't talk much, etc. most people are satisfied if i tell them that i'm "just shy." if someone persists in questioning me about their observations of me i will tell them about my disorder, rather than have them think that i am intentionally being rude.
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DivaD
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Joined: Feb 10, 2005
Posts: 781
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| Posted: Mon Dec 19, 2005 9:43 pm Post subject: |
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yes, lots of NTs tell me I'm normal, I look normal, I act normal, I talk normal, etc. etc. but, behind my back, they tell each other that I'm weird and odd! (I am quite obviously autistic, I don't even try to act normal, and have great difficulty talking)
grrr... i really don't like to say things that are anti-NT, but sometimes they just do stuff that makes themselves unlikeable  |
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Yupa
Avatar of Evil
Joined: May 15, 2005
Age: 18
Posts: 1315
Location: Florida
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| Posted: Mon Dec 19, 2005 9:45 pm Post subject: |
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| DivaD wrote: |
grrr... i really don't like to say things that are anti-NT, but sometimes they just do stuff that makes themselves unlikeable |
Everyone does. That's not exclusively an NT thing. |
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fahreeq
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Joined: Aug 16, 2005
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| Posted: Mon Dec 19, 2005 9:46 pm Post subject: Re: your normal!! |
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| Rach wrote: | | Do people, family members, friends etc tell you you dont have asperger's? someone with a big influence in my life is telling me i dont and as she is older i naturally want to believe her. Anyone else get told they're not? |
Not really, I just get to deal with a bunch of ignorance when it comes to the sucky stuff like sensory overload. |
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DivaD
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Joined: Feb 10, 2005
Posts: 781
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| Posted: Mon Dec 19, 2005 10:27 pm Post subject: |
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you quoted me out of context so I'm requoting myself in full
| Yupa wrote: | | DivaD wrote: | yes, lots of NTs tell me I'm normal, I look normal, I act normal, I talk normal, etc. etc. but, behind my back, they tell each other that I'm weird and odd! (I am quite obviously autistic, I don't even try to act normal, and have great difficulty talking)
grrr... i really don't like to say things that are anti-NT, but sometimes they just do stuff that makes themselves unlikeable |
Everyone does. That's not exclusively an NT thing. |
in the context of what I was saying your comment doesn't make sense. |
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rearden
Pileated woodpecker
Joined: May 10, 2005
Posts: 196
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| Posted: Mon Dec 19, 2005 10:31 pm Post subject: |
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People who don't really know me think I'm perfectly normal but a little geeky. I haven't told them I have AS because I doubt they'd believe it.
The few people who really do know me well knew I'm different before I knew about AS and before I ever told them. My best friend always said I'm like a super-intelligent space alien who's trying to blend in with humans, but isn't quite able to pull it off. Pretty accurate description. 
When I told the people who know me well about AS and showed them a list of symptoms, their reaction was "Wow.. It all makes sense now." |
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333Onfire
Tufted Titmouse
Joined: Dec 12, 2005
Age: 21
Posts: 38
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| Posted: Mon Dec 19, 2005 10:59 pm Post subject: Re: your normal!! |
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| fahreeq wrote: | | Not really, I just get to deal with a bunch of ignorance when it comes to the sucky stuff like sensory overload. |
What is sensory overload,if you don't mind?I have heard a few people mention it. |
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rearden
Pileated woodpecker
Joined: May 10, 2005
Posts: 196
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| Posted: Mon Dec 19, 2005 11:21 pm Post subject: Re: your normal!! |
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| 333Onfire wrote: | | fahreeq wrote: | | Not really, I just get to deal with a bunch of ignorance when it comes to the sucky stuff like sensory overload. |
What is sensory overload,if you don't mind?I have heard a few people mention it. |
When you have a very strong reaction (anger, stress, having to leave the area, etc) to things like loud noises, strong smells, being around a lot of people, having to do multiple things at the same time, etc. |
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nirrti_rachelle
Go Tigers!
Joined: Jul 22, 2005
Age: 33
Posts: 1187
Location: The Dirty South
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| Posted: Mon Dec 19, 2005 11:49 pm Post subject: |
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The only people I've told are a couple of friends and my mother. My friends seem to be very receptive about the whole thing. One of them is every extroverted yet accepting of new ideas since she's so used to encountering different cultures being that she lived in South America for a year, is bi-lingual and loves exotic dishes, alternative ideas and isn't part of the mass cultured sheeple. She's accepted my traits, my quarks and finds it especially amusing my tendancy to be very literal. It goes without saying I wish all NTs were as cool as she is.
My mother wasn't a bit surprised when I told her about AS. She has many aspie traits herself and so do most members of our immediate and extended family. She always knew she never functioned like everyone else in terms of learning and social style and found it a struggle in school. Though she didn't know the reason, she always suspected some type of learning disability or different "whiring". My telling her about AS gave her insight about my problems growing up, her struggles and why mental illnesses and developmental disorders run in our family.
My grandmother? I don't know if it would even be a good idea to tell her. She's in her late 60s and may not understand how a person who can function close to normal can be autistic. Her generation, as most black people do, chalk pecurliarities up as something you got from your mother's side of the family or "Uncle Darrel acts like that. Cousin Angela gets scared of strange things, too. It runs in the family." Which is true but they're sceptical about putting labels on strange behavior because to them, if everyone in the family acts this way, then it's just another difference, not something to be scared of or correct into being "normal".
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Astarael
Numquam obliuiscor..
Joined: Aug 07, 2005
Posts: 1293
Location: Western Australia
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| Posted: Tue Dec 20, 2005 7:35 am Post subject: |
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| hale_bopp wrote: | | Yes, but it's not because I don't, ite because they just don't want to accept it. |
I agree. People just act as if it doesn't exist and I'm normal because they don't want to believe that the label I have is real. Not everyone, but some of my friends do.
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