Kazami
Tufted Titmouse
Joined: May 26, 2006
Posts: 35
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 Posted: Wed Jun 21, 2006 5:53 am Post subject: My Situation |
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Okay, I have a fiancé. I'm happy just for this fact, but the situation is pretty unusual.
Y'see, we met online on a message board about two years ago. We both live in the United states, but on opposite ends of the country(she in California, I in Ohio). I'm an undiagnosed aspie and she has emotional problems. Well it made her more negative, but twords herself, thus her inferiority complex and lack of self-confidence.
We took a liking to each other quite fast, even just chatting on the IM. Then Valentines day came. We never even thought of meeting IRL, let alone go on a real date, but I liked her enough and "asked her out" as my girlfriend. She said yes, and we then gained the boyfriend/girlfriend title.
We opened up a little more to each other, and even shared a couple photos of ourselves. But considering that I never had a job before in all my 24 years, her family thinks I'm not worthy enough for her, let alone thinking of meeting her as my girlfriend. Though that didn't stop me from proposing to her on new year's day. I know,we never even met IRL, yet I wanted to marry this girl. Not supprisingly to me, she said yes.
Now, a few months later, I saved up a decent bit of cash, but I don't think I can make it if I move clear across the country away from my family, without a roommate or the uncirtainty I have of ever getting and keeping a job. I do have a friend that said she'd move with me as a roommate(who coincadentally has a boyfriend of her own in Cali), but she never had a job either.
tl;dr-I'm in a long-distance relationship with my fiancé that I've never met IRL. Is there anyone that delt with a successful internet relationship? I know that as long as we both have the will for it, it'll work out, but things still seem pretty hopeless ATM. Comments? Questions?? Suggestions?? |
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TheMachine1
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Joined: Jun 12, 2006
Posts: 9092
Location: 9099 will be my last post...what the hell 9011 will be.
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| Posted: Wed Jun 21, 2006 6:16 am Post subject: |
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| Have either of you been to college? You could both goto the same college. |
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Kazami
Tufted Titmouse
Joined: May 26, 2006
Posts: 35
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| Posted: Wed Jun 21, 2006 6:26 pm Post subject: |
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She's in college right now, but I had to drop out of school(9th grade  ) to help take care of my grandpa(who passed away 3 years ago). |
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TheMachine1
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Joined: Jun 12, 2006
Posts: 9092
Location: 9099 will be my last post...what the hell 9011 will be.
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| Posted: Wed Jun 21, 2006 7:08 pm Post subject: |
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Goto her schools website and lookup:
1) Can you get in with a GED?(if your smart enough to post here you can pass it)
2) How much is out-of-state tution?
3) How long to become a state resident.
4)Do they have family housing available?
Note some states out-of-state tution maybe lowwer then her/your states
in-state tution. |
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Kazami
Tufted Titmouse
Joined: May 26, 2006
Posts: 35
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| Posted: Wed Jun 21, 2006 10:30 pm Post subject: |
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Alright, thanks. I'll try that and update here  |
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jaguars_fan
Deinonychus
Joined: Apr 18, 2006
Posts: 339
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| Posted: Wed Jun 21, 2006 10:52 pm Post subject: |
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| This might be a bit off topic but Kazami, You have one interesting avatar. Oh and good luck with your relationship. |
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Kazami
Tufted Titmouse
Joined: May 26, 2006
Posts: 35
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| Posted: Thu Jun 22, 2006 12:45 am Post subject: |
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| jaguars_fan wrote: | | This might be a bit off topic but Kazami, You have one interesting avatar. Oh and good luck with your relationship. |
I think it suits my personality  And thanks. |
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emp
Phoenix
Joined: Apr 15, 2006
Posts: 1001
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| Posted: Thu Jun 22, 2006 7:16 am Post subject: Re: My Situation |
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| Kazami wrote: | | I'm in a long-distance relationship with my fiancé that I've never met IRL. |
What?! That is ridiculous! You cannot have a fiancé who you have never met IRL! That is just plain ridiculous. It is as ridiculous as getting married at age 12.
By all means continue the relationship, and good luck with that, but she is not really your fiancé. |
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TheMachine1
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Joined: Jun 12, 2006
Posts: 9092
Location: 9099 will be my last post...what the hell 9011 will be.
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| Posted: Thu Jun 22, 2006 5:00 pm Post subject: |
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please delete all my posts.
Last edited by TheMachine1 on Thu Jun 29, 2006 5:29 am; edited 1 time in total |
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Kazami
Tufted Titmouse
Joined: May 26, 2006
Posts: 35
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| Posted: Thu Jun 22, 2006 7:03 pm Post subject: |
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| TheMachine1 wrote: | She said she wants to marry him. That makes her his fiancé. The odds
of their relationship working out are about the same (50%) regardless
if they meet in real life or not. |
By definition, you're right. But I think that as long as we both have the will for it, it'll work out. |
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Enigmatic_Oddity
Phoenix
Joined: Nov 05, 2005
Posts: 1995
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| Posted: Thu Jun 22, 2006 8:56 pm Post subject: |
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| Wow. Insane. Good luck and tell us how it goes. If you succeed I'll eat my hat. |
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emp
Phoenix
Joined: Apr 15, 2006
Posts: 1001
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| Posted: Sat Jun 24, 2006 6:13 am Post subject: |
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| TheMachine1 wrote: | | She said she wants to marry him. |
Saying that you want to marry someone that you have never met in real life is just plain foolishness. |
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TheMachine1
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Joined: Jun 12, 2006
Posts: 9092
Location: 9099 will be my last post...what the hell 9011 will be.
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| Posted: Sat Jun 24, 2006 7:01 am Post subject: |
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Please delete all my posts.
Last edited by TheMachine1 on Thu Jun 29, 2006 4:37 am; edited 1 time in total |
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emp
Phoenix
Joined: Apr 15, 2006
Posts: 1001
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| Posted: Sat Jun 24, 2006 7:24 am Post subject: |
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| TheMachine1 wrote: | I'm not looking at his words. I do not care if he gets married.
I only care that he is not alone. Having asperger means he will
have a very limited choice of relationships in life. In other words
while you have a girlfriend EMP many people with asperger may
never. I'm not a virgin but I've never had a girlfriend. I had
those chances like Kazami has now that I failed to execute on
(being too picky and/or shy). I think it is a very good idea for
him to goto college and meet this girl in the real world. If he
gets married and its a nightmare. Well guess what most the
time it turns out to be a nightmare anyway. Is it better to
never been in love or to have been in love and it go bad? |
I already said:
"By all means continue the relationship, and good luck with that, but she is not really your fiancé." |
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Beenthere
10 Miles South of Sanity
Joined: Dec 30, 2005
Age: 46
Posts: 2245
Location: Pa.
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| Posted: Sat Jun 24, 2006 2:20 pm Post subject: |
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Kazami...you need to meet her IRL. You need to spend time together...marriage is 24/7....you are dealing with someone else who isn't you, who may have the same interests and beliefs...but doesn't think like you, may not always understand you... and maybe has a few habits that will drive you up a wall...and vice-versa...you need to know if you are truly a perfect match for each other or will drive each other insane with time.
I don't want to sound discouraging...I truly hope you've found your "soulmate"...but you definately don't want to rush anything. |
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