Why do I hate it when other people try to help me?

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I am 17 with ASD/AS/VCfs and I don't know why but every time someone offers to help me at school I would just get really frustrated with when they are helping me and I don't know why. Every time someone comes up to me and trys to help me they will say to me no matter what project I am doing they will go "Dude you are doing this wrong" and I get really embarrassed when they say something like that. I would also be like almost done with the assignment and I would be trying to turn it in and when I do the other person will look at it and go "This is not how you do this" and I am like "Are you kidding?" Another thing that I hate is that when someone comes to help me they would look at my sheet and go "DUDE OH MY GOD THIS IS SO EASY, HERE THIS IS HOW YOU DO THIS" and the whole time they will explain this to me I am thinking "Wow what an idiot I am" and I seem to think that is true. I also hate it when people will send someone up to come and help me do work because sometimes I could be working in a class where I am doing a subject that requires me to cook or something they will send someone to help me with the supplies and it would be really embarrassing for them to come and help me and I see none else getting the same help that I am because it makes me feel like I am dumb. I wouldl like to know am I the only one like this when I work with people? I don't know why but I hate working with other people and I prefer to work alone.

Sometimes I get like that, and I think you have a desire for independence. You simply want to do things on your own. There is nothing wrong with getting help though. It doesn't make you dumb. You might have some different way of learning, like I do.

Guitar_Girl

I'm the same way. I get really frustrated when someone tries to teach me or show me a better way to do something if I didn't ask, or even when they correct me. I think us Aspies are wired for independence. We have a strong desire to do things for ourselves. To learn things on our own, even if it is by silently watching someone else.

I can't remember the last time I asked someone to help me with anything. I hate it. I like to do things on my own, even if it is the hard way.

It's totally normal.
If the are being a jerk about it, then they are a jerk.
If they say "OH, THIS IS SO EASY!" then say "OH, YOUR MOM IS SO EASY".....haha, jk, don't do that, or do that on your own risk (that tends to get people angry, haha).
But really, if they are making you feel inferior, then that is somewhat bullying.

The only time I let people help me is when they are actually going to help me.
If they are going to be a jerk about it, I don't what their help.

Oh, and the REAL way to stop people from doing that is to appear smart.
Notice how I said appear.
Just help everyone else out (nicely) and answer a lot of questions, and people won't try to make you feel stupid (just don't show off too much, or else they try and compete with you.)
It is a fine balance: look smart enough that people come to you for help, but dumb enough that you aren't competing to be the smartest person in class (that you are infallible).

Heres one last way to think about it:
If you are the top dog, then everyone is constantly going to be trying to dethrone you (which, if you know your stuff and are competitive, can be fine...just know that EVERYONE is fallible)
If you are the bottom of the barrel, everyone is going to make fun of you because they think of you as the scum (which you can almost always find someone who is more stupid than you)
You just need to establish yourself in the middle, the norm., and people will leave you alone for the most part.

Oh, and I've been in all three spots, so I've had experience in all of it

People generally want to be independent. When someone helps you, it takes away your empowerment to help yourself.

People with disabilities can particularly get upset over this. I know full well that I struggle to do things that most people seem to do so easily. If I had to depend on someone to always help me, I'd resent it. Not because the other person wants to help, but because it makes it glaringly obvious that I can't take care of myself.