Treated like a child

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I have been out on my on my own for 8 years and my parents still give me stupid cleaning inspections and if i fail them they force there way onto my property and clean it. And I am sick off it! My mother refuses to enter!! Even if a single dish is on the sink she flips get stack. Just because I have frigging as there is no need for that behavior I am over it!

You can kick them off and you can refuse to let them in. When parents are acting controlling and hovering over you like that when you are an adult, you are not going to establish healthy boundaries without a fight. They will likely think you have something to hide or are being paranoid, but if you can deal with them calmly and rationally (especially if they have the cops check on you), then they will eventually get over it. It doesn't matter if you are a slob that hoards, they don't have any legal authority to control your life. And if you have given your parents any access to your medical records or given a doctor's office permission to talk to them, I recommend you remedy that first.

If my parents wanted to come and clean my house I'd leave the door wide open for them.

If my parents wanted to come and clean my house I'd leave the door wide open for them.

what can i do

Wow.. they sound like control freaks!
Unless they're paying your bills I'd be blunt with them - "I appreciate the concern but this is may House/Apartment/etc. When I was under your roof I abided by your rules but now I live on my terms not yours". I'd add something like "I have Aspergers Syndrome- I'm not ret*d. If you insist on treating me like this I don't have to allow you visit."
Seriously - the more you enable that behavior the worse it will get.

This. Change the locks if necessary, and don't give them a key. When you want to get together, get together at a restaurant or at their place, and not at your place.

Only after you establish independence can you gradually reconcile on a more equal basis.

they are in the wrong here. this is your property and u have every right to refuse maybe they will learn a lesson

This does sound like crazy controlling behavior. If you haven't told them exactly how you feel about it and that you want it to stop immediately, then you must tell them this as jedaustin says. If confronting them verbally is difficult, put it in writing. If they do not listen, is there a family friend or another relative who might help you get the point across to them? Sadly, they may take it more seriously if it is coming from a third party.

Once after helping me move into a new apartment following a divorce, before leaving, my mother looked me right in the eye and asked, "Can you survive?"

No, mother, you'd better stay with me. I'm a helpless child, and I'll curl up and die if you cut the umbilical cord.

That was 10 years ago, and if I hadn't moved almost 3,000 miles away from my mother, she would still be trying to rearrange my house, reorganize my cabinets, and such. For that matter, she still wants to hold my hand when we're crossing the street.

And I'll be 47 years old in June.

Sorry, but I don't think there is any "polite" way to handle this. You're going to have to put your foot down, even if they call you an ungrateful child, or get all teary with the "I'm only trying to help" routine. Either they knock it off and let you live your life your way, or you move so far away from them that they can't do this to you.

Based on just the information you posted (and having a mother who used to do this to my room...I just never let her in my apartment) I'd say you are in the right, and the best thing to do is arrange for meetings outside your living space.

However - just to play the devil's advocate and make sure we have all the information - is there any reason your parents might believe your apartment is unsanitary (beyond the single dish, obviously that's inappropriate?) I'm not talking a little sloppy, but I know people with executive dysfunction can forget to clean until they are at risk of losing their apartment.

Tidy/untidy = none of their business (except when it present a fire hazard, I suppose)

Sanitary/unsanitary = they might be trying to make sure your health is OK, and that you don't lose your housing.

They better stay away from me im not a child

Have you clearly communicated that to them? Is it possible that they do not know that it is upsetting you?

If you are able to confront them, it may turn out well, or they may throw a fit and blame your behaviour on your reduced mental capacity (if they know about your diagnosis). Someone mentioned the parents calling the police... It's not unheard of. If you decide not to let them in when you feel they're intruding, you should try to calmly explain that you are fine but... indisposed.

My family used to do the same. Mom tricked me into giving her my key, and then went into my home when I was away. For the past few apartments I've refused to give it to her. Mom and grandma still nagged me about cleaning, things I had bought etc. I'm sometimes scared of mom because she can get loud and aggressive. Mostly I shut down when she goes off.

About five years ago I decided I had had enough. I agreed to meet them once or twice a month. She didn't take it well. She would sound angry when she called and once said "This is your mother". Yeah, i still remember you Grandma rarely contacts me, my stepdad doesn't care. I would think to myself "This is my home. If you can respect that, you're welcome to visit anytime. If not, there's the door." When they came by, simple phrases like "let it go" worked

It's been worth it.

If your parents are the only social contact you have, it may be hard to let go.

my children are still very young(6&4) so I am not there yet, but as a parent I wonder what their intentions are. Do they mean well or are they just trying to be controlling? eather way, if it is bothering you, you must say something or just let it go. If you say something and they continue to try and control things then you really have to put your foot down and have a good chat with them. You do know them best, of course, so do what you think you need to do to get them to stop.

Of course they mean well. It's just that to some moms, we will always be their 11 month old babies that need help learning to walk, no matter how far past that the evidence says we are.