Should a teacher talk to the class about Aspergers?

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pinteleyid
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28 Jun 2011, 9:16 am

I'm asking this in the context of camp, but the same question applies to a school environment.

My almost 7 year old son, who has Aspergers, is starting a new day camp next week. We've spoken to the councilors an given them as much background as we can. The question came up of whether or not to be up front with the other kids - for example, on the first day reading them a book about Aspergers. This could be done in the context of each kid telling something unique about themself. My son is very open about having Aspergers, and would have no problem doing that.

People on the "against" side, have concerns that it would be singling him out and may cause more problems and teasing.

People on the "for" side point out that the kids will pick up fairly quickly that my son is "different" and being up-front about what that difference is and how they could help could prevent problems. Also, they point out that if a child had a physical disability you would certainly talk about it, e.g. "Billy has a XXX so he would be able to go swimming with us, but he loves to sit on deck and you can still play ball with him that way".

For those of you with AS, what do you think, would you have liked it if a councilors or teacher talked to the group/class openly about his on the first day?

To parents/anyone else, what's your take?



liloleme
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28 Jun 2011, 9:30 am

I personally think its a good idea but only if your son agrees to it.
It is true that the other kids are going to "know". My sons teacher is always trying to convince us that the other kids dont notice our son is "different" or, as they call it here, has a handicap. If I spoke enough French I would take him to her every time I pick him up crying because someone had been picking on him. Calling him stupid or manipulating him, saying they are his friend to get things from him, like his pokemon cards. These kids are not blind, they do know that he is not like them and some of them are very cruel. Maybe if they did know things would be different but he will be going to a specialized school next year for kids with PDD's and Learning Disabilities.
The kids in my daughters class (she is in kindergarten) were told that she had Autism and they explained things to them in simple ways. Like they said she may scream or make strange movements and not want to be touched sometimes. It has made a big difference. All the children are so sweet to her and they take care of her. She is now attempting more at playing with other kids and they seem to accept when she wants to be alone. She also has an awesome aide who has worked hard to learn about autism....my sons aide knows very little about aspergers and seems not to care to learn.
I think if you sons class is going to be educated that you find a book, I think there is one out there that explains Asperger's to typical kids or make sure that you tailor what you say to a 7 year old level. It could make a big difference like with my daughter and it also could backfire depending on the children and how things are explained and also how much protection and supervision your son gets in places like the playground or lunch room.



pinteleyid
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28 Jun 2011, 9:46 am

Thanks for the reply, and I agree with your line of though.

Even if the discussion only really hits home with 1 or 2 kids in the class, those 1 or 2 kids may "stick up" for my son, if other kids pick on him. There's a world of difference between everyone in the class picking on you vs. some of the class picking on you. If it's not everyone, you can ignore/avoid those people who have a problem with you, and specialize with the ones who understand.

This is the book I was thinking of using: "Can I tell you about Asperger Syndrome?: A guide for friends and family". Sorry I'm new to the forum and am not allowed to post links yet (cool anti spam measure, btw) You can find it on Amazon



techn0teen
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28 Jun 2011, 10:04 am

I think it would be good to tell the class about aspergers because it gives a reason for the behavior. Especially if you tell the kids that many other people have aspergers too.

If a kid sees your son acting out a behavior common to aspies, instead of thinking "they're weird" they will say "it's because of aspergers". It makes them less likely to bully if it has a name to it.



liloleme
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28 Jun 2011, 10:04 am

I have seen that book before but never read it....I was on amazon and found this one....I like the illustrations. http://www.amazon.com/What-Be-Me-Asperg ... pd_sim_b_1


this one looks good too

http://www.amazon.com/Autism-Acceptance ... pd_sim_b_3



pinteleyid
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28 Jun 2011, 10:10 am

That looks like a great book, but $10 is the USA and $25 up here in Canada. How can that be justified! I'm going to try to order it from the States, but I doubt it will make it here before Camp starts (especially given the long weekend, and the fact that the post office here was just forced back to work from a lockout yesterday)



liloleme
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28 Jun 2011, 10:20 am

It makes me mad that I can find things in the US that are cheaper than I can find them in like the UK. Its next to impossible to find much in France. I was amazed though, while on Amazon I looked on Amazon France and found that the book "10 Things Your Student With Autism Wishes You Knew" is in French. Im definitely buying for my daughters new teacher since she is going to the big school next year and I know by the fact that my son was there that they are not very well educated in Autism. I also found Tony Attwood's Complete Guide To Aspergers in French. The teachers at his new school should be better educated but Im buying it anyway because they are a bit behind here than in the US....more than a bit actually!

Just found out I was wrong....the 10 Things Your Student With Autism Wishes You Knew is not translated into French....its translated into a lot of other languages, some I did not even recognize. However my husband did find something like it, in French. I still need to look at the Attwood book to see if it is translated.



Last edited by liloleme on 29 Jun 2011, 7:56 am, edited 1 time in total.

Lene
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28 Jun 2011, 12:56 pm

Quote:
People on the "against" side, have concerns that it would be singling him out and may cause more problems and teasing.


Can I offer another suggestion against?

It may turn out that your son is better at coping than people give him credit for- quite often people behave differently in different situations and he may learn to adapt to some degree.

Even if he only manages to adapt a little bit or fit in slightly, that's something that will stay with him afterwards. If he is singled out as different however, he will be Different from the start and may not learn as much about his peers as they will be less likely to pass remark or might even avoid him.

Please don't get me wrong; I'm not advocating the 'school of hard knocks' or some kind of trial by fire. But children do develop their communication skills by being amongst their peers and learning to muddle along, so although it may be tougher for him at the time, in the long run perhaps it would be for the best.

I say this because the only times in life that I have come on in leaps and bounds is when I've been plucked from a group I know (and who know me too well- as a weirdo) and into new faces where I can start afresh. New people= slightly new perspective and a chance to practice skills which I knew in theory but couldn't put into practice on home turf (it's harder to mingle with people who have already labelled you)

That's just my perspective anyway. I agree that the people running the camp should know- most are very helpful. Hope your son has fun!



squirrelflight-77
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28 Jun 2011, 1:29 pm

Jordan has multiple medical issues and all camp staff receive a 'packet' on her needs, schedules, what to do if.. , signs of low / high blood sugar, special instructions, when to contact me, as well as that she is be allowed to sit out on any activity if she chooses and that if she would like to leave for the day arrangements are in place for that. I talk to all staff prior to her attending camp or any other program but I prefer to allow her to make her own first impression with the kids. Some like her some dont. She usually finds someone that she gets along with.

Unless your child has very severe issues or something that sticks out immediately I would not have all the children talked to. If a problem occurs and you think this will help fine but I wouldnt do this unless there was a problem. He may do fine. If the kids are not immediately told of his differences they may just see what they have in common.. they like swimming, running, playing, art, .. etc.

Just be sure the staff is very well briefed on his needs. Then they can intervene if necessary and will not push when not appropriate, etc. They need to know what you want. I know most parents consider camp childcare so the child must stay till 6 but I have alternate care in place so I make sure they know that. If she is tired and wants to leave she is always allowed to leave. She doesnt actually use this but feels better knowing she can. :roll:


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pinteleyid
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28 Jun 2011, 2:00 pm

Lene & squirrelflight-77, Great perspectives, thank you!

I certainly see both of your perspectives; you "need to take the training wheels off so they learn how to ride", so to speak (I know this might not be the best forum for metaphors). I think it depends very much on the age and specifics of the child in question If their social skills are sufficiently developed that they could relate to other kids in some way, then I'm in total agreement with you.

In my case, my son is 6 (almost 7) and is currently having severe anxiety over camp, which for the past month has been manifesting itself as very aggressive behaviour at school (hitting random people, swearing...). We're doing everything we can to ease the anxiety, but I suspect that until he gets used to the new environment and people, we'll see more of the same behaviour.

As with many kids with AS, my son's a hard case - at his "best", he's the most interesting, well behaved, and likable 6 year old you'll ever meet - completely able to function with minimal support in any environment. At his "worst", they would have a hard time managing him in special needs camp. He''ll always have his moments, but if I knew the bulk of the summer would have him at his "best" I'd be included to not bring Aspergers up with the kids. But, if the first week or more will have a half dozen "worst moments" per day, I'm really not sure if bringing it up will help or hurt.



squirrelflight-77
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28 Jun 2011, 2:10 pm

pinteleyid wrote:
Lene & squirrelflight-77, Great perspectives, thank you!

I certainly see both of your perspectives; you "need to take the training wheels off so they learn how to ride", so to speak (I know this might not be the best forum for metaphors). I think it depends very much on the age and specifics of the child in question If their social skills are sufficiently developed that they could relate to other kids in some way, then I'm in total agreement with you.

In my case, my son is 6 (almost 7) and is currently having severe anxiety over camp, which for the past month has been manifesting itself as very aggressive behaviour at school (hitting random people, swearing...). We're doing everything we can to ease the anxiety, but I suspect that until he gets used to the new environment and people, we'll see more of the same behaviour.

As with many kids with AS, my son's a hard case - at his "best", he's the most interesting, well behaved, and likable 6 year old you'll ever meet - completely able to function with minimal support in any environment. At his "worst", they would have a hard time managing him in special needs camp. He''ll always have his moments, but if I knew the bulk of the summer would have him at his "best" I'd be included to not bring Aspergers up with the kids. But, if the first week or more will have a half dozen "worst moments" per day, I'm really not sure if bringing it up will help or hurt.


I agree .. if things are not going smoothing see if it helps the other children be more understanding. Hopefully it will go well.. Jordan is usually kept so busy she doesnt have time for trouble and things are organized so she always knows what she is supposed to be doing which helps.


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aspie48
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28 Jun 2011, 3:05 pm

idk it really depends what is said. my experience is acually that no one gives a dam, its really just a waste of time. I once did a school project on autism and presented it and after class got out most people forgot about it and some people made ret*d jokes about it.



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28 Jun 2011, 9:41 pm

I'll share this link again just because I thought this mom did such an awesome job with the task of telling her son's class and of telling the story of how she did it (click on the address below even though it may not look like a link it is, I have never figured out how to make these appear underlined).

http://momnos.blogspot.com/2010/03/on-being-hair-dryer-kid-in-toaster.html



liloleme
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29 Jun 2011, 8:07 am

aspie48 wrote:
idk it really depends what is said. my experience is acually that no one gives a dam, its really just a waste of time. I once did a school project on autism and presented it and after class got out most people forgot about it and some people made ret*d jokes about it.


That is a problem and thats why I mentioned that some kids are just flat out mean and any ammunition they get they are going to use but then again there are some other kids that are decent and do try to help. I even would manage to find one or two kids in my schools who were, at least, kind to me. I had no diagnosis and in my time there was no Asperger's but everyone knew I was different. I also think it matters the age, older kids can be worse that the younger ones. High School and middle school were very bad for me. In middle school I rode the bus with some of the HS kids and I would try to hide down in my seat with my tape player (I was obsessed with Rick Springfield and his music helped me get through that ride). The HS guys were very abusive (and Im a girl and I was little and short too). They would hit me in the head by throwing their shoes at me....most of the time it would land in my lap because I was scrunched down in the seat. They would also throw these huge spit balls at me and the ring leader would actually come and sit behind me and actually spit on the top of my head and call me names, mainly ret*d. Once he took my tape recorder and I was crying hysterically when I got off the bus so the bus driver asked me what was wrong....still I was too afraid to say so someone else told the bus driver and the bully was made to give me back my recorder but he stole my tape and tore it up outside the bus. My Mom bought me a new one.

I think if a parent comes to a school or camp (for young kids) and talks to and explains it is more helpful and better understood than if the student themselves do it.



izzeme
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29 Jun 2011, 10:05 am

if your son is open about his AS and doesn't mind, i think it will be a good thing to indeed tell the tale; NTs are usually quick to pick up on AS quirks, especially in camp setting.
in school, lunchbreaks and the time you are at home can be used to recharge your batteries without anyone realy noticing, but in camp others will notice that you are away/on your own quite a lot, this will feel weird to them, if they dont know you need the time off (speaking out of experience here)



pinteleyid
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30 Jun 2011, 10:16 pm

Bombaloo,

Thank you so much for that blog link, I had never seen that before - it's up there as one of the most amazing thing I've read.

Sort of puts my "read the class a book about asperger's" idea to shame. Maybe I'll fly her in to talk to his group ;)


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