Joined: Nov 07, 2011 Age: 28 Posts: 1268 Location: The Butthole of the American Empire
Posted: Fri Feb 24, 2012 7:50 pm Post subject: I must make a confession.
I am bisexual!
I am attracted to both sexes and I can not control it.
I can't tell anyone about this in fear of ridicule and judgment.
It feels better to break the silence on line. _________________ “During times of universal deceit, telling the truth becomes a revolutionary act" ~George Orwell
"I belive in God, only I spell it Nature."
~ Frank Llyod Wright
I do not think any less of you. Feel free to be who you are.
(So long as it doesn't hurt yourself or anyone else) _________________ All fantasy should have a solid base in reality.
Joined: Nov 07, 2011 Age: 28 Posts: 1268 Location: The Butthole of the American Empire
Posted: Fri Feb 24, 2012 8:11 pm Post subject:
Thank you! It's too bad that my family are homophobic and believe that bisexuality does not exist. _________________ “During times of universal deceit, telling the truth becomes a revolutionary act" ~George Orwell
"I belive in God, only I spell it Nature."
~ Frank Llyod Wright
I don't think any less of you either! I hope you find happiness with whomever you are with!
It is tough being around homophobic friends and family. Even some homosexual people are put off by bisexuality because for a lot of people it is black and white. You are gay or straight. They have a hard time believing in people being attracted by both sexes.
Joined: Jan 05, 2012 Age: 28 Posts: 246 Location: Birmingham, UK
Posted: Sat Feb 25, 2012 5:00 am Post subject:
Feels liberating letting people know!
I'm gay and I felt the same way you do about not telling people a while back. It got to the point where I was sick of people saying to me, "so have you got a girlfriend yet" so I just started saying, "well no cos I like men, but to answer your question I ain't got a man either (lol)". I was worried about how people would react, what they would say, if they would still like me and all the usual paranoia that is associated with this. You want to know what happened after I told people I liked guys (that's how I say it to people)? Nothing. Nobody cared (in a good way), nobody laughed, joked, mocked, snickered and I didn't lose a single friend. Other people are just as involved in their lives as we are with ours, so all that fear I had over telling people was completely unfounded. Would you dislike one of your friends if they told you they were gay/bi? No, and most other people wouldn't either, we just think they would out of an irrational fear of being seen as even more different by other people.
With regards to your family I have not been in that situation so I'm not sure what to say about it.
You should approach this issue in a way that you feel most comfortable with, but take it from a random stranger you have never met before on the internet; most people just won't even batter an eyelid if you tell them (excluding your family *perhaps*).
Anyway I know this is different for each person but good luck with this.
Joined: Apr 18, 2011 Age: 21 Posts: 2676 Location: the old country
Posted: Sat Feb 25, 2012 5:55 am Post subject:
it sucks that you cant tell people about your sexuality but im glad you feel comfortable enough to say it here. the queer community is mostly accepting of bisexuality these days or at least the parts i come into contact with are(queer youth group, campaign groups, queer collective at uni and rallies) but you do meet the odd person who keeps asking you if you have a girlfriend even though they know you are bi and then tell you it is just a phase. it is definitly worse outside the queer community though. apparently we just do it for the attention if we are female and if we are guys then we arent bi. either that or we just dont exist full stop. my family are monosexist like yours. they dont even know bisexuals exist. they were like what are those people called? "trysexuals"? one can only hope that they will come around. anyhows im glad you could come out here even if its not the real world but, you know, its like a first step thing. just come out at your own pace. when you said "confession" i thought if was going to be something horrid or that you were addicted to chocolate or something...
Joined: Nov 07, 2011 Age: 28 Posts: 1268 Location: The Butthole of the American Empire
Posted: Sat Feb 25, 2012 9:58 pm Post subject:
I have known that I was bisexual since I was 14 but had to remain silent.
MY family are all conservative catholics and they see homosexuality as morally wrong.
I will never understand why conservatives are so close-minded and judgmental. _________________ “During times of universal deceit, telling the truth becomes a revolutionary act" ~George Orwell
"I belive in God, only I spell it Nature."
~ Frank Llyod Wright
Joined: Feb 13, 2010 Posts: 18236 Location: the island of loveable toy humans
Posted: Sun Feb 26, 2012 12:36 am Post subject:
artrat wrote:
I have known that I was bisexual since I was 14 but had to remain silent.
MY family are all conservative catholics and they see homosexuality as morally wrong.
I will never understand why conservatives are so close-minded and judgmental.
that is because conservatives, by and large, have yet to be deflowered by the harsh reality that more pedestrian sorts had to learn about early in life. they tend to believe bad things cannot happen to them, and to also believe that if something bad happens to somebody else, that it must be that person's fault for one reason or another. google the word "hubris."
Joined: Mar 08, 2010 Posts: 802 Location: Leicestershire, UK
Posted: Fri Mar 09, 2012 3:46 pm Post subject:
artrat wrote:
I will never understand why conservatives are so close-minded and judgemental.
Binary thinking. The universe is much simpler and easier to understand if you can divide it into two. Black/white, light/dark, yes/no... and right/wrong. The concept that there's a whole grey area in which things aren't right or wrong but depend on circumstances is positively frightening to them.
The outcomes of binary thinking are bizarre sometimes. Atheism is linked to devil worship, which kind of misses the point of atheism (not worshipping ANY gods, including dark or evil ones!) because they only see two options - God, or the Devil.
The anti-abortion anger stems from the idea that, if women CAN have abortions for any reason, they WILL. The idea that women may have an abortion because they need to but not actually want to falls into that grey area again and does not compute.
Homosexuality is another right/wrong issue. It's different to "normal" people, and normal people are right, so it must be wrong. Since binary thinking also divides sex into two and only two categories, a binary thinker can also justify homosexuality as deviant because it gets lumped in with cross-dressing, weird fetishes, leather dungeons and spanking, paedophilia, bestiality, necrophilia... some of these are clearly immoral, so they must all be.
You'll have a tough time explaining bisexuality to really hardcore conservatives. They don't believe it exists. Go out with a guy, and you're gay. If you go out with a girl the next week, they'll think you switched to being straight.
. The few other bi guys I've met were strict tops (unlike myself).
