Hello... I think I could have Aspergers...

Goldie83 · Emu Egg Joined: Apr 28, 2012 Posts: 7

Hello everyone

I have always known I was different and I didn't know why. I have never felt like I belonged. I hope that this is the place.

I am a 28 year old Australian woman and have had social issues all of my life. These days, unless you are close to me (very small group), you wouldn't know. I have spent my entire life trying to fit in by copying other's behaviors. I have become quite adept at it. Especially in a work context (social can sometimes still be a bit iffy).

I am not sure whether I would be classified as Aspergers as my repetitive and stereotyped behaviours are not pronounced. Does that mean I don't have Aspergers? I have read that Aspergers is much harder to spot in girls (from the limited material I can find on girls with autism). Are there any other women/girls out there like me?

I realise that everyone is busy and probably wont have time to read it, but I have attached some symptoms/traits that I think are autism spectrum related. I have not had a diagnosis. I have started seeing a new psychologist and he suggested it might be worth looking into. Since then that is basically all I have done! The most surprising thing was the face blindness! I just sort of thought everyone was like that. I would appreciate any opinions or to hear from anyone about their experience.

Thank you Very Happy

Social
To age 8 (approx)
As a baby would scream when people other than mother went near
"Expelled" from 2 pre-schools. Would not stop screaming.
Tantrums into teens
Cried every day for first 1.5 years of school
Obsessive behavior with toy until pre-teen
Played on own
Stilted interactions
Post-8ish
Interactions based on mimicking current 'best' (only) friend (continued to early-20s). Recently have been based on many different people and mostly for conversation skills.
Tendency to be taken advantage of
Escape to fiction/TV/Fantasy
Do not understand peer interactions (has improved)
Do not understand what to say in social situations (has improved)
People are aware that I don't touch anyone
Do not understand the rules and am anxious when I am not sure of the rules or I think someone is acting outside of the rules I know
All consuming desire to fit in
Feel more connected to animals than people
Communication
Theoretical understanding of facial expressions. Difficulties during emotional times, with subtle emotions, more than one emotion and hidden emotions (has improved).
Very aware of eye contact. Conscious and monitor it.
Aware of arm placement in conversations
Very literal and gullible (has improved)
Difficulty following complex verbal instructions
Difficulty remembering conversations. Difficulty summarising conversations.
Face blindness
- forget meeting people even soon after
- sometimes don't recognise people out of context
- can not visualise family but do recognise them
- can not visualise self
- can not imagine what people in fiction look like
Occasional inappropriate truthful statements (has improved)
Occasional repetition of words. Not out loud.
Physical/Emotional
Walked at 17 months. Spoke early.
Very sensitive to cold
Sensitive to changes in air pressure
Sensitive to light
High pain tolerance
Unusually fast reader but difficulty spelling
Excellent rote memory
Quick learner. Learn by doing. Bored easily with little patience.
Can not remember dance steps and similar, bad balance. Not clumsy but awkward. However good hand eye coordination.
Highly emotionally sensitive
Strange posture (however I am 6ft tall)
Repetitive/stereotyped behaviours
Suck thumb until pre-teen, bite lip, scratch head, hands under dripping/spaying water (rarely), pat animals
Rubbed face with favourite toy when child
Tapping, chewing, bouncing (developed later in life - possibly due to anti-depressants)
Very systematised. Processes, rules. Like to analyse sets of data at work.
Only mildly obsessive interests. TV, fiction.