fuzzylights
Hummingbird
Joined: Dec 18, 2012
Posts: 19
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 Posted: Tue Dec 18, 2012 7:47 pm Post subject: Asking people to hang out |
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I'll keep this short - I have a little thing for one of my guy friends (I'm a girl), and I'd like to ask him to hang out with me, one-on-one. We have hung out alone before but it wasn't planned. It went well, but I'm afraid me asking him will sound too "date-y". I'm really nervous he'll shoot me down or think I'm desperate or strange...I'm not going to try and make a move or anything, my intention is literally just to spend more time with him alone and get to know him more.
Any advice as to how I could phrase it, or reduce the awkward feelings on my part? I will be seeing him in person within the next few days, which is when I'll ask him. |
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cathylynn
Phoenix
Joined: Aug 25, 2011
Posts: 2177
Location: northeastern US
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| Posted: Wed Dec 19, 2012 12:15 am Post subject: |
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| how old are you? could you ask him to study a subject he's good in with you? do you have common interests? the first time i was ever asked out, it was to go rock hunting. |
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Merle
Velociraptor
Joined: Nov 01, 2007
Posts: 471
Location: Lake Tahoe
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| Posted: Wed Dec 19, 2012 2:15 am Post subject: |
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"I am planning on XYZ, want to come?"
The date portion can imply that you won't do XYZ unless they come. For me, this works for a lot of things as you are pretty much stating your intent, and offering an invitation to the, to be accepted or not. It can be for something as simple as catching a movie, going for a walk/jog or participating in a group event.
This is typically why group events aren't usually considered dates but safe areas to get to know someone. |
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fuzzylights
Hummingbird
Joined: Dec 18, 2012
Posts: 19
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| Posted: Wed Dec 19, 2012 2:38 am Post subject: |
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| We are both in our twenties. I was planning on just hanging out casually at one of our houses. My main issue is that I'm TERRIFIED to ask. I'm afraid he'll think I'm coming off too strong, creepy, etc. I know that these things aren't rational but I can't seem to put my mind at ease. I'm afraid of the answer. These things trip me out majorly! I'm going to feel super awkward if he says no, for whatever reason... |
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Geekonychus
Phoenix
Joined: Nov 16, 2012
Age: 27
Posts: 671
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| Posted: Wed Dec 19, 2012 11:09 am Post subject: |
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| You're overthinking it and the longer you wait the worse it will get....... |
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fuzzylights
Hummingbird
Joined: Dec 18, 2012
Posts: 19
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| Posted: Wed Dec 19, 2012 1:45 pm Post subject: |
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| Geekonychus wrote: | | You're overthinking it and the longer you wait the worse it will get....... |
That's true. I'm always guilty of overthinking. A friend told me to just be chill and ask like I was asking anybody else. I guess that's just what I'll have to do. |
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wtfid2
Phoenix
Joined: Aug 10, 2012
Age: 23
Posts: 1548
Location: new jersey usa
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| Posted: Wed Dec 19, 2012 2:41 pm Post subject: |
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well i would start by calling him and talking with him normally for 5 minutes. after you guys are comfortable, i would
A- ask if he's seen the hobbit. If he says no, say you were thinking of seeing it and since he hasnt seen it maybe you two could go together.
B- ask if he's ever been to (insert restaurant) if he says yes ask how he liked it and if he;'d like to go there...if he says no tell him you had a craving for it and were wondering if he wanted to go there.
easier said than done.
_________________
AQ 25
Your Aspie score: 101 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 111 of 200
You seem to have both Aspie and neurotypical traits |
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