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Laureanne Yellow-bellied Woodpecker


Joined: Jul 08, 2004 Posts: 50 Location: NY
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Posted: Thu Mar 31, 2005 2:49 pm Post subject: Helping 11 yr old Aspie daughter to understand |
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mY 11 yr old aspie has such difficulty when people are treated differently or get away with breaking the rules. She's very afraid of breaking rules for fear of being called out and put on the spot. Yet she resents fiercely other children who blatently break rules. Thank you in advance for your input.
Laure
 _________________ Laure
If we want the world to be a better place we must start with the children.
Ghandi |
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chamoisee Phoenix


Joined: Aug 28, 2004 Age: 37 Posts: 1066 Location: Idaho
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Posted: Thu Mar 31, 2005 5:10 pm Post subject: |
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| I don't know what to say. She's right. |
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Ghosthunter Phoenix


Joined: Mar 20, 2005 Posts: 2473 Location: Minneapolis, Minnesota
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Posted: Thu Mar 31, 2005 5:59 pm Post subject: Where to start? |
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[mY 11 yr old aspie has such difficulty when people are treated differently or get away with breaking the rules. She's very afraid of breaking rules for fear of being called out and put on the spot. Yet she resents fiercely other children who blatently break rules.]
I am not a child psychologist, but since she has AS I may be able
to offer some ideas.
•She seems overly sensive to her envirement? If so, remember
she may outgrow this.
•What does she show interest in that might help you explain that
people don't follow the rules and perhaps make it a fun lesson?
•Guidelines to behaviors explained to her might not sink in, but
give them a try.
The difficult thing about her age is that she isn't a teenager and
thus hasn't gone through all emotional changes as well as physical
ones. |
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thechadmaster Deinonychus


Joined: Feb 14, 2005 Posts: 343 Location: Here, wherever that is
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Posted: Thu Mar 31, 2005 6:19 pm Post subject: |
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I have the same difficulties. I always want justice and get p'od when people break rules and get away with it, I get called on EVERYHTING _________________ ##ALERT--- SENSORY OVERLOAD COMMENCING-- ALL FUNCTIONING SYSTEMS WILL BE SHUT DOWN##
uh-oh i think too much |
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pyraxis Phoenix

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Joined: Mar 26, 2005 Posts: 1527
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Posted: Thu Mar 31, 2005 6:23 pm Post subject: |
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| You could always try explaining to her the real rules of the situation. Like, say a kid cuts in line to stand beside a friend and nobody gets upset. The exception to the cutting-in-line rule are the people who know that "making a big deal over nothing" is a socially unacceptable response and use to their advantage the fact that no one wants to object for fear of being accused of taking things too seriously. There are systems to unspoken rules too, and they can be learned the same way as any other system. If she doesn't realize the extent to which that's true, she may find it more reassuring than overwhelming to be able to apply her intelligence to the problem. |
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