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Self-hate and avoidance
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Deinonychus
Deinonychus


Joined: Jan 27, 2012
Posts: 362
Location: France

PostPosted: Thu Sep 05, 2013 9:18 am    Post subject: Self-hate and avoidance Reply with quote

I don't know if it has happen to you but I have been reproached to be far away from people or not follow their rules. So from that I could deduce that my self-hate could be the result of the reproach of me being avoidant. However, I noticed an inner force toward self-hate that did not seem to follow from avoidance, but rather the contrary.

Avoidance is based on a fear of relationships and is not necessarily related to self-esteem. It does not necessarily mean that we want to be far from people, just that we avoid contacts for example because we can't handle them.

And we know that self-hate is something that separate from others: "anyway I am a bad person so leave me alone" or "I am a bad person so I am going far away". So unconsciously we may find self-hate appealing because if take distance we avoid contact with people.

So in fact, it is rather that self-hate is fuel by the sensation of relief of being away from people and thus avoiding contact.

What do you think of this theory?
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1401b
Phoenix
Phoenix


Joined: May 22, 2012
Posts: 1237

PostPosted: Thu Sep 05, 2013 1:42 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Not bad, can't see why that can't be true often enough.
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