The pattern of women I attract.

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The_Face_of_Boo
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05 Feb 2014, 6:11 am

I had my doubts but after nth case - I am quasi-sure about the pattern I attract.

I am not talking about okc cases here, but real life ones.

I've noticed that the women who ever get interested are:
- Above 25 years old, most above 29.
- Reserved yet extrovert. Often moderately religious, attached to family.
- Outgoing, like way more outgoing than me, and often more in touch with the "outing world", (places, events..) I am sure you get what I mean.
- Not-so-smart.
- Holding entry jobs, like senior secretary, call center operator, part-time jobs, not very ambitious. Often graduates from non-university institutions (I knew some who are smarter and way more cultured in those but not those ones) or just school.
- They chit chat a lot, talk nonstop.
- Often significantly less educated but always significantly less cultured.
- Picky, as they reject, without exception, guys because of their entry job level, like security guards, drivers ..etc.
- Not readers at all, the only things they know about is celeb news, pop songs gossip news, outing events...etc.
- Weak in foreign languages, usually in English. People who don't know English are often very limited, poorly cultured, and not aware of infinite of things in the world.
- Typically girly.
-Almost computer illiterate except in Facebook and Whatsapp.
- They love to take pictures a lot... with poses.
-Lookwise they vary from average to very good looking.

They can be entertaining outing buddies and I respect them as individuals, but not more than that, I have no romantic interest in them and whatsoever. I usually reciprocate slight interest for a very short time at first but after chatting with them for a bit , I find out what they all about and lose total interest, and eventually they give up and end up just as friends (After I friendzone them). In fact, I can't talk with them in deeper things than people news, work, family, mundane stuff... zero..nil...
And no they are never potential short terms (before anyone suggests it).

Like that 33 yo woman yesterday, single and obviously seeking , was showing me on her phone a guy who's stalking her on her fb, Liking and posting flirts and poems on her 'model-like poses' pics, and her one-word replies to his wall-text messages, and she was like "Look how nice he's pretending to be, they told me he's the worst badass ever" - I was like "maybe... but sometimes people exaggerate, he could be fine". And she was like "You don't get it! you never post such things to me!", I went into a very awkward silence.

-_______- I did know it before but I have zero interest to have any relationship with her because she's one of the people I described above, I knew her for about a year.

Any other males feeling they're stuck in this.... attraction and unable to attract people who are more similar? Do I have to accept my fate and date what I attract? -____- , currently they are the only real date potentials.



MjrMajorMajor
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05 Feb 2014, 6:30 am

Two things come to mind..
-find ways to vary your approach
-mix up the venues

You know the qualities you're looking for, now find a way to narrow in.



Vitamin-K
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05 Feb 2014, 6:31 am

To begin, no you don't have to accept your 'fate' and date the people you're attracting. Patience and time.

Read your bullet points, and I'd touch on a few of them. People generally are attracted to people around their own age. It's innate, and healthy. As to being extroverted, I'd imagine from reading some of your posts that in person you are more of an introvert (and feel free to correct me if I'm wrong about any of this.) At any rate, extroverts generally attract introverts and vice-versa. As to the not smart thing, can't really speak to that because eh, the world seems to be full of dumb. Anyway, what do you do for work? If you work in a career or trade you will likely find people looking to date people in a similar life position or status. Again, just how it works.

Moving on, if you are quiet often, sometimes people will feel the need to fill the silence. This isn't always good but it isn't always bad, either. Depends on the moment.

I don't know what your method is to finding people in real life to date but having been a DJ for 15 years I can safely say that I encountered a great many of the type of person you are describing at clubs and raves. This isn't a bad thing as they're great people. No matter how much they aren't like you or me they are their own person and I respect and love them for that. What it comes down to though Boo is if you are finding yourself stuck in a rut then maybe it's time to find some other places to meet people. You say for example people you meet aren't readers. This may sound super cliche but you may try hanging out in libraries and finding people who are reading similar books that you are. Maybe find a local book club or activities group to join.

Who knows? You never will know though unless you try :D



salamandaqwerty
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05 Feb 2014, 6:38 am

i find myself in a vaguely similar situation. I have moved back to my home town where the availability of single women and dating environments are less than enticing. I have gone out and mingled a few times at local bars (which is not really my scene) and the only women I have met are very similar to those you mentioned, I am bordering on desperate loneliness but the thought of being with someone who I cant relate to is a Major turn off for me. I don't think that it is a matter of only attracting that type of women, there are just many more women like that, well around here anyway. I have talked to some amazing aspie women online and just wish that i could meet someone with their character traits and depth in real life.


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The_Face_of_Boo
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05 Feb 2014, 6:52 am

I work in financial services, mid-career level.

I never go to read in libraries , I just download ebooks or books through amazon or a book shop or thro a friend who travel a lot. And one can't talk with anyone in libraries as they have strict silence policy, following a girl going in her way out is something I won't do, no thanks lol.

I don't go to bars nor night clubs, I've met those women in...activities, hiking, beach, gym, buddies of buddies, friends of colleagues..etc.



MjrMajorMajor
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05 Feb 2014, 7:04 am

Any college towns/urban centers nearby? It sounds trite, but take an intellectual side class?



Yuzu
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05 Feb 2014, 7:18 am

Dude, you're just as picky as I am. And what did you say to me in the other thread?
"you are just guaranteeing yourself to die single" Right back at ya.



The_Face_of_Boo
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05 Feb 2014, 7:20 am

MjrMajorMajor wrote:
Any college towns/urban centers nearby? It sounds trite, but take an intellectual side class?



Why things should be that hard **crying and blowing in Major's dress**. I have courses to take but not for meeting people purposes, let's see what will happen.



The_Face_of_Boo
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05 Feb 2014, 7:23 am

Yuzu wrote:
Dude, you're just as picky as I am. And what did you say to me in the other thread?
"you are just guaranteeing yourself to die single" Right back at ya.


Oh...let's cheer dying forever alone then!!

If I recall right though, the criteria you're seeking was liking a specific band music.



Yuzu
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05 Feb 2014, 8:00 am

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
Yuzu wrote:
Dude, you're just as picky as I am. And what did you say to me in the other thread?
"you are just guaranteeing yourself to die single" Right back at ya.


Oh...let's cheer dying forever alone then!!

If I recall right though, the criteria you're seeking was liking a specific band music.


This thread is about you not me.
I think you've lost male allies on this board with this thread. Now you're one of us picky girls.
And you're one step ahead of me too. You friendzone these girls. How dare you!



The_Face_of_Boo
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05 Feb 2014, 8:10 am

Yuzu wrote:
The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
Yuzu wrote:
Dude, you're just as picky as I am. And what did you say to me in the other thread?
"you are just guaranteeing yourself to die single" Right back at ya.


Oh...let's cheer dying forever alone then!!

If I recall right though, the criteria you're seeking was liking a specific band music.


This thread is about you not me.
I think you've lost male allies on this board with this thread. Now you're one of us picky girls.
And you're one step ahead of me too. You friendzone these girls. How dare you!


Male allies?

Should I start wearing a skirt? Looks comfortable.



MjrMajorMajor
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05 Feb 2014, 8:56 am

Image

You'd be in good company... :wink:



Shau
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05 Feb 2014, 9:03 am

lol Boo is attracting a bunch of bimbos. Hey, at least you're getting SOMEWHERE!



Geekonychus
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05 Feb 2014, 9:24 am

An aloof athiest in the middle east. Some girls like the mysterious rebel types......... :wink:

I bet they're alll hoping to melt your icy heart and turn you into an honest and devout man.......but you're too much of a rebel for that........which only make you hotter. :heart:



The_Face_of_Boo
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05 Feb 2014, 9:36 am

And oh, they all love hookah and hookah cafes.

I hate hookah/smoking cafes, and their food are worse than restaurants.



blackcat
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05 Feb 2014, 9:47 am

Yuzu wrote:
The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
Yuzu wrote:
Dude, you're just as picky as I am. And what did you say to me in the other thread?
"you are just guaranteeing yourself to die single" Right back at ya.


Oh...let's cheer dying forever alone then!!

If I recall right though, the criteria you're seeking was liking a specific band music.


This thread is about you not me.
I think you've lost male allies on this board with this thread. Now you're one of us picky girls.
And you're one step ahead of me too. You friendzone these girls. How dare you!


the very concept of friendzoning is such a steaming pile of s**t.


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