"I have autism" is terribly hard to say

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TheValk
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17 Apr 2014, 3:54 pm

It's very firmly a fact within my mind, but I don't seem to be secure enough about stating it out loud, yet.

Today I managed to utter it on my third attempt, after some stuttering (I stopped stuttering more or less completely a decade or so ago). I suppose the stigma is still high enough? There always seems to be a huge difference between the public perception of autism and the impression I have made to the person in question. The response tends to be, 'ah you have some traits you mean; I see', because people seem to expect somebody with my diagnosis to lie in bed in a pile of drool or something (though it seems to me that I'm approximately in the middle between that and being an ordinary neurotypical with too much progress to be made still and many seemingly uncrushable barriers to overcome).



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17 Apr 2014, 7:14 pm

People after a while find me strange so in my job I was straight up at the start and was open about the fact that I have Autism.

I don't use the term Aspergers either Autism is something people will get.

It's liberating I just come straight out and said it I have Autism it makes social interaction a nightmare and I get a bit anxious.

Having said all that people get to see somebody who has Autism who is good at their job.

If you hide it people will slowly learn you are odd and they back off.

I just say it from the start I have autism and then I show them that I can do my job really well.



MathGirl
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17 Apr 2014, 7:40 pm

I understand... it tooks me a while to practice it and learn how to say it without anxiety or hesitation. I can do it now, but it took years. It's interesting how saying that I have something else that I wasn't diagnosed with (e.g. I have depression) is ridiculously easy and painless.


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kraftiekortie
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17 Apr 2014, 7:44 pm

Autism is funny. It's a stigma--yet it is fascinating.



EzraS
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17 Apr 2014, 7:53 pm

I want people to know I'm autistic. They are always going to know there is something different about me, even just posting in forums, so I figure they might as know what instead of making them make wrong guesses.



jrjones9933
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17 Apr 2014, 8:02 pm

I selectively reveal it, and it got easier with practice.

My Psychology professor, actually the head of the department, argued with me about it when I visited his office. I found it kind of funny, kind of annoying and kind of a compliment. I managed to fool him, basically, because I can often interact with people as though I have social skills from instinct rather than practice. After I talked a little about my feelings and struggles, though, he got over the fact that I "don't present as autistic" as he put it.



kraftiekortie
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17 Apr 2014, 8:04 pm

Your avatar looks like the cat that Tom (of Tom and Jerry) was smitten with.



AdamAutistic
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17 Apr 2014, 8:06 pm

i feel it is very obvious that i have autism. caregiver feels the need to tell people anyway.

i don't mind.


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jrjones9933
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17 Apr 2014, 8:08 pm

kraftiekortie wrote:
Your avatar looks like the cat that Tom (of Tom and Jerry) was smitten with.


I don't remember that about Tom an Jerry. For the record, Tama is a boy cat from the anime Nyan Koi!



kraftiekortie
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17 Apr 2014, 8:10 pm

LOL....I could be wrong.

Oh well.

I guess that was pretty autistic of me: not being able to tell the subtleties of faces.



skibum
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17 Apr 2014, 8:41 pm

I say it very easily and to a lot of people, not everyone but to people who will be around me enough to notice my quirks. I say Asperger's or Autism interchangeably. I am very comfortable with saying either or. It is very liberating to be able to say it and I am proud to say it because before I was able to say it, before I knew I was on the Spectrum, I could always tell that people could not quite figure me out. So now that I just say it, most people just say "okay" and they know that if I do something weird it's probably because of that.


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ZombieBrideXD
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17 Apr 2014, 8:46 pm

i agree, i get nervous saying it.

usually, i dont tell anyone, i try to appear as normal as possible, if someone needs to know or i need to explain myself thats when i say anything


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Minionkitty
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18 Apr 2014, 5:18 pm

When I act out in public, or if I can't do something, my grandma will tell the person "Oh, she's just autistic" even though I'm diagnosed NLD still at this point. She thinks this is a misdiagnosis. This can be embarrassing, but I guess my behaviour probably embarrasses her too.


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Adamantium
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18 Apr 2014, 5:41 pm

TheValk wrote:
It's very firmly a fact within my mind, but I don't seem to be secure enough about stating it out loud, yet.

Today I managed to utter it on my third attempt, after some stuttering (I stopped stuttering more or less completely a decade or so ago). I suppose the stigma is still high enough? There always seems to be a huge difference between the public perception of autism and the impression I have made to the person in question. The response tends to be, 'ah you have some traits you mean; I see', because people seem to expect somebody with my diagnosis to lie in bed in a pile of drool or something (though it seems to me that I'm approximately in the middle between that and being an ordinary neurotypical with too much progress to be made still and many seemingly uncrushable barriers to overcome).


I have only told a few close relatives and some friends or colleagues form work. What I found helpful to their understanding and my vocalizing the thing was to say
Quote:
I have a kind of autism. It used to be called aspergers but now it is seen as a form of the autism spectrum. This is part of the reason why I almost never write letters or make phone calls and sometimes don't want to go to certain kinds of place. I am exactly the same person you have always known, but some of the things that make me a little unusual are part of the bigger pattern called autism.


Mostly they don't want to get into it beyond that. They have quite often had the sort of "aha!" moment when they seem to think or come right out and say "so that's why you are so different!" I think the whole topic makes people uncomfortable, though. They don't want to say the wrong thing, so they don't say anything--or they are just waiting for me to go away!



ImeldaJace
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18 Apr 2014, 5:46 pm

I really wish that there wasn't any stigma associated with autism because autism is just so much a part of me. It's funny, but I don't really view autsim as a disability in and of itself. Autism is just another thing that makes me who I am in the same way that my creative nature contributes to who I am as a person. I really hope that the stigma will change and that it will someday be "ok" in the eyes of the world to be autistic.



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18 Apr 2014, 6:05 pm

ImeldaJace wrote:
I really wish that there wasn't any stigma associated with autism because autism is just so much a part of me. It's funny, but I don't really view autsim as a disability in and of itself. Autism is just another thing that makes me who I am in the same way that my creative nature contributes to who I am as a person. I really hope that the stigma will change and that it will someday be "ok" in the eyes of the world to be autistic.


The only way the stigma will end is for higher functioning people to stop trying to hide their Autism.

I sarted working in my current job almost two years ago through an agency.
On my second day I told my manager I had Autism.

I no longer work through the agency I am permanent with the company itself.

All my co workers know I have some type of Autism.

When I signed my permanent contract I declared my Autism.

Now ask the question how likely would that company be willing to take on somebody with Autism in the future I would say very likely.

This is the most successful I have ever been in fitting in and being accepted by a group.

If somebody joined with Autism now it would be no big deal it would oh SharkAttack has autism too.

My diagnosis says ASD so I don't bother with that Aspergers Syndrome nonsense it only confuses most NT people.