MehruneMath
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker
Joined: 8 Sep 2014
Age: 31
Gender: Male
Posts: 61
Location: Boston, MA
09 Sep 2014, 2:23 pm
I'm going to try to keep this short and cram as much about myself in here as possible without being overly descriptive as I often write posts on Reddit and other forums that are so long it makes some people upset with me. So I will do my best to keep this brief.
Greetings Wrong Planet,
I was given a suggestion by a co-worker months ago after a short discussion where I was bringing up my inability to make and maintain relations with people, even family. I'm only good with business relations; as it seems I fail at real friendships with people. Even though I would enjoy this. I've only ever had three close friends, whom are the only friends I've had. I no longer talk to any of them and I currently have one friend in work that also like video games. I often find solitary activities more interesting and time worthy. I enjoying learning about space, and physics, and mathematics in my spare time. I also enjoy playing video games.
I've always tried to be normal and live a normal life but I'm now twenty-one, going on twenty-two, and just now realizing that I cannot ever really be normal. I'm obsessed with Ray Kurzweil's singularity; I've always ran from the fact that I was a nerd but I'm now accepting of this. I want to be myself and although I cannot afford to go to college I want to learn computer programming, and work as a software engineer.
Why do I believe I have Aspergers?
Well I think that I have mostly every trait; save for the fact that I make sustained eye contact with people.
I like looking at people, and I do it all the time even if we're not talking. If I like a girl I will stare constantly, sometimes it becomes difficult not to. I'm very introverted. I have a weird sense of humor. I cannot tolerate people making unnecessary noises, or staring at me. When people walk behind me it makes me upset. I'm obsessive over whatever my current obsession happens to be, and I'm socially aloof. I have little empathy with people that I'm not attached to and after a week or two most people whom are formal with me cease communication, and avoid me. I'm not attached to anyone at the moment, however I feel as though if I was I would be very emotional. Normally I'm very stoic, and detest displaying emotions, and the emotions of others make me feel very uncomfortable. I like to rub my ear lobes and the back of my head and hair. I have certain schedules and rituals I almost have to do. I love schedules and planning things out. I cannot drive a car, although by luck after my third attempt I have my drivers license. I have an above average Intelligence quotient(over 180) I have many of the other standard traits of someone in the autism spectrum, and I'm just now contemplating what this might mean for me. I'm fully convinced I have some form of Aspergers.
As an aside I also took this test linked here: http://rdos.net/eng/Aspie-quiz.php
My results were the following -
Your neurodiverse (Aspie) score: 155 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 68 of 200
You are very likely neurodiverse (Aspie)
Last edited by MehruneMath on 09 Sep 2014, 9:28 pm, edited 2 times in total.
09 Sep 2014, 2:42 pm
Fnord's classic reply!
Last edited by RichardJ on 10 Sep 2014, 6:09 pm, edited 1 time in total.
BirdInFlight
Veteran
Joined: 8 Jun 2013
Age: 62
Gender: Female
Posts: 4,501
Location: If not here, then where?
09 Sep 2014, 4:33 pm
Yeah, I vividly remember Fnord's -- uh -- friendly welcome wagon -- too.....
09 Sep 2014, 5:34 pm
Well, well, well, - welcome aboard 
09 Sep 2014, 7:59 pm
StarTrekker
Veteran
Joined: 22 Apr 2012
Age: 31
Gender: Female
Posts: 3,088
Location: Starship Voyager, somewhere in the Delta quadrant
09 Sep 2014, 8:39 pm
Welcome to WP Mehrunemath
As the others have stated, we obviously can't give you a definitive answer here, however, from the traits you describe, you certainly sound like you could be on the spectrum. Keep in mind however, that a lot of gifted individuals (especially profoundly gifted, such as yourself) display a lot of traits that look like AS, but which are just a manifestation of their intelligence. Whether or not it especially matters, I don't know; the cause may be different, but the traits are the same.
My query is, how are your social skills? You say you are introverted, which would account for your not using social skills frequently, however, that is not the same as not having them. How are your conversational skills? Can you make small talk? Do you recognise nonverbal communication, facial expressions, humour, sarcasm etc.? Do you understand the nuances of the things people say (such as hints, or phrases they use when they're not being serious, but just trying to be polite)? Do you ever find yourself saying things that you thought were fine, but ended up offending somebody, or has anyone ever commented that you seem to be socially unaware or naive? These are the sorts of things autistic individuals have trouble with, which gifted NTs do not.
09 Sep 2014, 8:50 pm
Greetings Wrong Planet,
I was given a suggestion by a co-worker months ago after a short discussion where I was bringing up my inability to make and maintain relations with people, even family. I'm only good with business relations; as it seems I fail at real friendships with people. Even though I would enjoy this. I've only ever had three close friends. I no longer talk to any of them and I currently have one friend in work that also like video games. These have been my only real friends. I often find solitary activities more interesting and time worthy. I enjoying learning about space, and physics, and mathematics in my spare time. I also enjoy playing video games.
I've always tried to be normal and live a normal life but I'm now twenty-one, going on twenty-two, and just now realizing that I cannot ever really be normal. I'm obsessed with Ray Kurzweil's singularity; I've always ran from the fact that I was a nerd but I'm now accepting of this. I want to be myself and although I cannot afford to go to college I want to learn computer programming, and work as a software engineer.
Why do I believe I have Aspergers?
Well I think that I have mostly every trait; save for the fact that I make sustained eye contact with people.
I like looking at people, and I do it all the time even if we're not talking. If I like a girl I will stare constantly, sometimes it becomes difficult not to. I'm very introverted. I have a weird sense of humor. I cannot tolerate people making unnecessary noises, or staring at me. When people walk behind me it makes me upset. I'm obsessive over whatever my current obsession happens to be, and I'm socially aloof. I have little empathy with people that I'm not attached to and after a week or two most people whom are formal with me cease communication, and avoid me. I'm not attached to anyone at the moment, however I feel as though if I was I would be very emotional. Normally I'm very stoic, and detest displaying emotions, and the emotions of others make me feel very uncomfortable. I like to rub my ear lobes and the back of my head and hair. I have certain schedules and rituals I almost have to do. I love schedules and planning things out. I cannot drive a car, although by luck after my third attempt I have my drivers license. I have an above average Intelligence quotient(over 180) I have many of the other standard traits of someone in the autism spectrum, and I'm just now contemplating what this might mean for me. I'm fully convinced I have some form of Aspergers.
As an aside I also took this test linked here: http://rdos.net/eng/Aspie-quiz.php
My results were the following -
Your neurodiverse (Aspie) score: 155 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 68 of 200
You are very likely neurodiverse (Aspie)
You shows all the sign of having autism, although you can can exhibit symptoms of other disorders like social anxiety and so on. I think that if you don't understand how people socialize and get close to each other very rapidly, then you are most likely autistic. Do you have any stims?
MehruneMath
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker
Joined: 8 Sep 2014
Age: 31
Gender: Male
Posts: 61
Location: Boston, MA
09 Sep 2014, 9:14 pm
As the others have stated, we obviously can't give you a definitive answer here, however, from the traits you describe, you certainly sound like you could be on the spectrum. Keep in mind however, that a lot of gifted individuals (especially profoundly gifted, such as yourself) display a lot of traits that look like AS, but which are just a manifestation of their intelligence. Whether or not it especially matters, I don't know; the cause may be different, but the traits are the same.
My query is, how are your social skills? You say you are introverted, which would account for your not using social skills frequently, however, that is not the same as not having them. How are your conversational skills? Can you make small talk? Do you recognise nonverbal communication, facial expressions, humour, sarcasm etc.? Do you understand the nuances of the things people say (such as hints, or phrases they use when they're not being serious, but just trying to be polite)? Do you ever find yourself saying things that you thought were fine, but ended up offending somebody, or has anyone ever commented that you seem to be socially unaware or naive? These are the sorts of things autistic individuals have trouble with, which gifted NTs do not.
I've read through your post thoroughly, and have contemplated that perhaps I may not have an autism spectrum disorder, however that doesn't help to explain my social difficulties. I can make small talk. In fact many people enjoy talking to me for the first few minutes of a conversation. I think my opinions about various topics; in addition to my general dorky interests exhausts people rapidly and they no longer wish to engage in small talk. Possibly I irritate people with my random banter. I do understand social cues and sarcasm unlike my step-brother; whom is diagnosed with the condition. I seem to get along with him fairly well from what I can garner, however in response to your other inquiry; yes I do find myself making statements that seem to put off other people, although I don't fully comprehend why. Most of the time people stop communicating with me it's clear to me that they no longer wish to maintain a friendship, and I understand, and respect this. I know full well how to socialize with people and I believe I do so just fine, but there are times where I just know that people can tell I'm different. You may not perceive it from the impression I've made in my last few posts on this forum, but I have a tendency to use obscenities often in conversation as a means of expressing the way I feel. I do this in places where it is deemed inappropriate by mistake all the time.
Indeed I do, I often find myself touching my ears and running my hand up and down the nape of my neck to make myself more "adequately adjusted" so to speak.
StarTrekker
Veteran
Joined: 22 Apr 2012
Age: 31
Gender: Female
Posts: 3,088
Location: Starship Voyager, somewhere in the Delta quadrant
09 Sep 2014, 9:33 pm
MehruneMath
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker
Joined: 8 Sep 2014
Age: 31
Gender: Male
Posts: 61
Location: Boston, MA
09 Sep 2014, 9:56 pm
This to me suggests that autism is unlikely to be your problem. Your sensory difficulties may be explained by sensory processing disorder, a condition in itself (though it's not listed in the DSM), and your lack of empathy may just be part of your introversion. It is very common for gifted individuals to have special or all-absorbing interests, as well as quirky ways of interacting with people which, while different, are not clinically abnormal. I would recommend reading this article and seeing if any of it resonates with you:
http://www.salon.com/2013/09/21/thats_n ... erted_boy/
Thank you for linking me to this article. After reading through it I am positive this sounds more like myself than what I've read before.
I do not wish to see another mental health professional as I had to do this when I was very young, due to my social difficulties, intellect, hyperactivity, and my aptitude for memorization.
I was told I had a near photographic visual and auditory memory, Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder, and Obsessive Compulsive Disorder.
I wish you well. I will be sticking around on this forum regardless of my autistic status, as many of the users here seem similar to myself.
You all seem like great people and I look forward to interacting with you all in this community.
Last edited by MehruneMath on 09 Sep 2014, 10:28 pm, edited 1 time in total.
StarTrekker
Veteran
Joined: 22 Apr 2012
Age: 31
Gender: Female
Posts: 3,088
Location: Starship Voyager, somewhere in the Delta quadrant
09 Sep 2014, 10:06 pm
You all seem like great people and I look forward to interacting with you all in this community.
Glad to hear it
Of the symptoms you do share with us, I'm sure you'll find a lot of commonalities of experience.
ASPartOfMe
Veteran
Joined: 25 Aug 2013
Age: 66
Gender: Male
Posts: 34,469
Location: Long Island, New York
10 Sep 2014, 5:08 am
10 Sep 2014, 5:19 am
Greetings Wrong Planet,
I was given a suggestion by a co-worker months ago after a short discussion where I was bringing up my inability to make and maintain relations with people, even family. I'm only good with business relations; as it seems I fail at real friendships with people. Even though I would enjoy this. I've only ever had three close friends, whom are the only friends I've had. I no longer talk to any of them and I currently have one friend in work that also like video games. I often find solitary activities more interesting and time worthy. I enjoying learning about space, and physics, and mathematics in my spare time. I also enjoy playing video games.
I've always tried to be normal and live a normal life but I'm now twenty-one, going on twenty-two, and just now realizing that I cannot ever really be normal. I'm obsessed with Ray Kurzweil's singularity; I've always ran from the fact that I was a nerd but I'm now accepting of this. I want to be myself and although I cannot afford to go to college I want to learn computer programming, and work as a software engineer.
Why do I believe I have Aspergers?
Well I think that I have mostly every trait; save for the fact that I make sustained eye contact with people.
I like looking at people, and I do it all the time even if we're not talking. If I like a girl I will stare constantly, sometimes it becomes difficult not to. I'm very introverted. I have a weird sense of humor. I cannot tolerate people making unnecessary noises, or staring at me. When people walk behind me it makes me upset. I'm obsessive over whatever my current obsession happens to be, and I'm socially aloof. I have little empathy with people that I'm not attached to and after a week or two most people whom are formal with me cease communication, and avoid me. I'm not attached to anyone at the moment, however I feel as though if I was I would be very emotional. Normally I'm very stoic, and detest displaying emotions, and the emotions of others make me feel very uncomfortable. I like to rub my ear lobes and the back of my head and hair. I have certain schedules and rituals I almost have to do. I love schedules and planning things out. I cannot drive a car, although by luck after my third attempt I have my drivers license. I have an above average Intelligence quotient(over 180) I have many of the other standard traits of someone in the autism spectrum, and I'm just now contemplating what this might mean for me. I'm fully convinced I have some form of Aspergers.
As an aside I also took this test linked here: http://rdos.net/eng/Aspie-quiz.php
My results were the following -
Your neurodiverse (Aspie) score: 155 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 68 of 200
You are very likely neurodiverse (Aspie)
Well, this is a better post than my first one speculating what may be up with me. Thanks.
I took that online thing a while back. I had this discussion with my boss who believes this is something that needs to be holistically assessed. She hates survey-like tests administered when you're looking for a diagnosis. Anything I learned in college about ASD or Asperger's syndrome was utterly inaccurate, from an outdated textbook, or dumbed down to the point that it was frankly BS.
Even if you can't afford college, that is your dream and I think if you are capable you should pursue it. If it makes you feel better, I'm in the process of paying off loans for college. While that kinda sucks, I could have been working at a job in a restaurant or other hospitality place where constant interpersonal contact would stress me out and infuriate me. Is there a way to pursue this without necessarily going through the expense of a formalized education?
I am interested in politics and lately, philosophy. I like working independently because I'm happy working at my own pace. I am also actually fearful of having to deal with incompetence of others or having to fill in for people who don't do their part. At my job this happens all the time. Being exposed to this has done me well, although I'm not really optimistic about people and their potential, sadly.
I can drive. I just have a bad depth-perception. I cup my hand over my mouth a lot and brush my hair to the side for no reason. A lot. I also wring my fingers. The things you describe with noises and staring I relate to. Drives me crazy when people look over my shoulder.
Do you have issues sleeping?
MehruneMath
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker
Joined: 8 Sep 2014
Age: 31
Gender: Male
Posts: 61
Location: Boston, MA
10 Sep 2014, 7:25 am
12 Sep 2014, 2:43 pm
Greetings Wrong Planet,
I was given a suggestion by a co-worker months ago after a short discussion where I was bringing up my inability to make and maintain relations with people, even family. I'm only good with business relations; as it seems I fail at real friendships with people. Even though I would enjoy this. I've only ever had three close friends, whom are the only friends I've had. I no longer talk to any of them and I currently have one friend in work that also like video games. I often find solitary activities more interesting and time worthy. I enjoying learning about space, and physics, and mathematics in my spare time. I also enjoy playing video games.
I've always tried to be normal and live a normal life but I'm now twenty-one, going on twenty-two, and just now realizing that I cannot ever really be normal. I'm obsessed with Ray Kurzweil's singularity; I've always ran from the fact that I was a nerd but I'm now accepting of this. I want to be myself and although I cannot afford to go to college I want to learn computer programming, and work as a software engineer.
Why do I believe I have Aspergers?
Well I think that I have mostly every trait; save for the fact that I make sustained eye contact with people.
I like looking at people, and I do it all the time even if we're not talking. If I like a girl I will stare constantly, sometimes it becomes difficult not to. I'm very introverted. I have a weird sense of humor. I cannot tolerate people making unnecessary noises, or staring at me. When people walk behind me it makes me upset. I'm obsessive over whatever my current obsession happens to be, and I'm socially aloof. I have little empathy with people that I'm not attached to and after a week or two most people whom are formal with me cease communication, and avoid me. I'm not attached to anyone at the moment, however I feel as though if I was I would be very emotional. Normally I'm very stoic, and detest displaying emotions, and the emotions of others make me feel very uncomfortable. I like to rub my ear lobes and the back of my head and hair. I have certain schedules and rituals I almost have to do. I love schedules and planning things out. I cannot drive a car, although by luck after my third attempt I have my drivers license. I have an above average Intelligence quotient(over 180) I have many of the other standard traits of someone in the autism spectrum, and I'm just now contemplating what this might mean for me. I'm fully convinced I have some form of Aspergers.
As an aside I also took this test linked here: http://rdos.net/eng/Aspie-quiz.php
My results were the following -
Your neurodiverse (Aspie) score: 155 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 68 of 200
You are very likely neurodiverse (Aspie)
This is what I think of your post.
People say you need to get diagnosed by a professional but I think in most cases all a professional will do is rule out mental illness.
Some people with mental illness think they are God or that they have super powers or that they have Aspergers.
Reading your posts you come across and mentally healthy to me and from reading what you have posted I think it is a pretty safe bet that you are on the Autistic Spectrum.
I can tell you one thing it is not the end of the world.
Do you have other questions for me I would be happy to answer.
12 Sep 2014, 6:10 pm
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