Hi, I'm new here and Im writing here to seek out advice and maybe some helpful opinion from other people who have this. To be honest, I haven't been diagnosed, but Im one of the ones who suspect strongly that I have it. I fit almost all the symptoms, except a few especially for a young adult female though talking to me in person, in real life, maybe you wouldn't think so. In fact, Ive brought this up to my last two therapists but they laughed and said I was too articulate. Not considering the fact that I've try really hard to hide my awkwardness by imitating how others talk which is why I might seem this way.
I guess I should also say Im put for social anxiey which I think is true, but I think there is something innate with me like maybe the autism. Also, I have a long history of dealing with bullying at school and abuse at home.
To give a helpful view of who I am... Im a young college student, who still is at home, and I never go out except for school and maybe the store if Im desperate. I don't have any friends and haven't for a while now. Im terrible at making friends. I never speak and I don't know what to talk about or what to say. My parent told me: When I was little(4 or 5), I never talked and nothing would come out of me so my parents had a social worker observe me. I later found out that the social worker suspected I could have been (highly functioning?) autistic, but my mom strongly disagreed and stopped seeking help from them. And since then growing up I felt I've had such a hard time with socializing. Like I could stay silent and never talk but in my head was this complex and analytic nature, very aware and keen on things, even things others wouldn't notice.
Im tired of being isolated, I'm miserable, but I'm having of hard time on what I should do. Am I autistic? I want(need) to learn social skills. How can I learn them now?
25 Oct 2014, 9:12 pm
