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LoveableNerd
Velociraptor
Joined: Apr 24, 2008
Posts: 435
Location: Kentucky, USA
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 Posted: Sat May 31, 2008 1:16 am Post subject: Confucious says (humor) |
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I had posted this in the off the wall forum, but due to the crude humor thought it might be better to move it here.
Confucious say:
Man who walk through airport door sideways going to Bangkok
Man who drop watch in toilet bound to have shitty time.
Man who stand on toilet high on pot
Man who smoke pot choke on handle
Man who have women on ground have piece on earth.
Panties not the best thing in the world but next to it
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OK, those are mine. Now add your own. |
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LabPet
Phoenix
Joined: Jan 05, 2007
Posts: 1748
Location: Alaska
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| Posted: Sat May 31, 2008 1:18 am Post subject: |
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 Have you thought about making fortune cookies?
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same nightmare, different nap
Lab Pet, therapist slayer
Lab Pet's video: Autism is Synonymous with Science: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xYelVlA7kDw |
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LoveableNerd
Velociraptor
Joined: Apr 24, 2008
Posts: 435
Location: Kentucky, USA
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| Posted: Sat May 31, 2008 1:39 am Post subject: |
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| LabPet wrote: | | Have you thought about making fortune cookies? |
 Actually I've thought about making humorous negative fortune cookies. Like "Breath mints will do wonders for your social life." and "They aren't laughing with you... they're laughing at you." But something tells me Chinese restaurants would lose business if they carried them.
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Reasonable people adapt themselves to the world. Unreasonable people attempt to adapt the world to themselves. All progress, therefore, depends on unreasonable people.---George Bernard Shaw
8th Cmdmt: Thou Shalt Not Steal. |
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kip
Phoenix
Joined: Mar 14, 2007
Age: 21
Posts: 687
Location: Las Vegas NV USA
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| Posted: Sat May 31, 2008 5:08 am Post subject: |
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Hmmm... some places it would actually be funny to have rude slogans like that. NT's like being made fun of in goups.
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The two loudest sounds in the world are a click when you should hear a bang, and a bang when you should hear a click.
You can purchase anything off the Internet except common sense. |
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Rowen
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker
Joined: Feb 27, 2008
Posts: 58
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| Posted: Sat May 31, 2008 10:27 pm Post subject: |
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I love these saying
Confuscious sez man who shoot off mouth bound to lose face.
Man with feet firmly planted on ground have trouble putting on pants. |
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slowmutant
Phoenix
Joined: Feb 14, 2008
Age: 29
Posts: 6864
Location: Ontario, Canada
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| Posted: Wed Jun 18, 2008 6:22 pm Post subject: |
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Confucius say, He who laugh last not get joke.
Confucius say, Women who cook carrot and peas in the same pot is unclean woman.
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GoatOnFire
Greatest Of All Time
Joined: Feb 23, 2007
Posts: 3358
Location: Texas
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| Posted: Fri Jun 20, 2008 2:29 am Post subject: |
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Confucius say, wife who put husband in doghouse will soon find him in penthouse, with whores.
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Oh say, can you see? Everyone is dumb but me. I'm never ever wrong, and that's all you'll ever be. |
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blue_bean
Red in the face
Joined: Apr 14, 2006
Age: 24
Posts: 1168
Location: Mid North Coast, NSW, Australia
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| Posted: Fri Jun 20, 2008 9:00 am Post subject: |
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Wise man not spit in strong wind.
Wise man not fart in still wind.
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"There's a hole in the world like a great black pit and its filled with people who are filled with sh*t and the vermin of the world inhabit it" |
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Puq
Emu Egg
Joined: Jan 09, 2008
Posts: 5
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| Posted: Fri Jun 20, 2008 1:06 pm Post subject: |
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| Wise man not not not pee into wind. |
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thyme
Phoenix
Joined: Aug 06, 2007
Posts: 777
Location: Over the Hills and Far Away
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| Posted: Fri Jun 20, 2008 1:13 pm Post subject: |
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Confusious says man who run after car gets exhausted
Man who tell too many light bulb jokes gets burnt out
Man who drive like hell, bound to get there
Man who throws dirt is losing ground |
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slowmutant
Phoenix
Joined: Feb 14, 2008
Age: 29
Posts: 6864
Location: Ontario, Canada
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| Posted: Fri Jun 20, 2008 1:56 pm Post subject: |
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Man with hand in pocket feeling cocky all day long.
Man who run in front of car get tired. |
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traveller011212
Velociraptor
Joined: May 27, 2008
Age: 28
Posts: 400
Location: Right here!!
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| Posted: Fri Jun 20, 2008 11:03 pm Post subject: |
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| If you don't lose your fear of loosing site of the shore you will never know the utter terror of forever being lost at sea. |
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slowmutant
Phoenix
Joined: Feb 14, 2008
Age: 29
Posts: 6864
Location: Ontario, Canada
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| Posted: Fri Jun 20, 2008 11:32 pm Post subject: |
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That isn't funny. It's serious!  |
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slowmutant
Phoenix
Joined: Feb 14, 2008
Age: 29
Posts: 6864
Location: Ontario, Canada
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| Posted: Sat Jun 21, 2008 6:56 am Post subject: |
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| slowmutant wrote: | | Man with hand in pocket feeling cocky all day long. |
I love this one. |
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LabPet
Phoenix
Joined: Jan 05, 2007
Posts: 1748
Location: Alaska
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| Posted: Sat Jun 21, 2008 4:50 pm Post subject: |
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When I have Chinese food I get really anticlimatic fortune cookies with innane messages inside......so disillusioning. These are way better.
_________________
same nightmare, different nap
Lab Pet, therapist slayer
Lab Pet's video: Autism is Synonymous with Science: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xYelVlA7kDw |
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