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trialanderror
Blue Jay
Joined: Jun 02, 2008
Age: 31
Posts: 83
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 Posted: Mon Jun 02, 2008 10:41 pm Post subject: figuring out how to help as child |
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| I am a mother of 3 kids, 2 on the spectrum. It was a great relief to know that there was a reason they only thought outside the box. To my suprise, I learned that it was the reason I had such a difficult time "fitting in" , the duck out of water, growing up. I have not been diagnosed, but am 150% certain that I am on the spectrum. The kicker is trying to figure out where their problems end and mine begin. We seem to wash together in the melt down mode. Is there any other parents out there that have AS and are trying to raise kids with it too? My biggest challenge is that I have OCD as well and I have the constant need to control my (and by that I mean their) environment. My youngest is 5 and has the toughest of us all. She has NO sense of stranger danger, or any danger for that matter. I find myself talking so much to explain and protect her, that I am sick of hearing my own voice. I'm a dang nag! I want for her to experience life so she can cope when things don't always work. It isn't her hang up, it's mine and I can't seem to let go. I have tried the "get over it" approach and it doesn't work. It would be like asking my daughter to not have AS. If there are techniques to help my daughter cope, there has to be something for me. Please advise. |
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2ukenkerl
Phoenix
Joined: Jul 20, 2007
Posts: 4376
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| Posted: Tue Jun 03, 2008 6:16 am Post subject: |
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You MIGHT luck out and find THEY have the same OCD desires as you but, if not, you'll have to try to cut a comprimise. For starters, they should probably have their own rooms. That is better all around though.
For your daughter, keep trying to explain. She might not get the idea for a few years though. Young kids can just be trusting, even if they AREN'T ASD.
Wish I could really help. GOOD LUCK! |
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ster
Phoenix
Joined: Sep 24, 2005
Posts: 2243
Location: new england
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| Posted: Tue Jun 03, 2008 6:22 am Post subject: |
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| for my hubby, who's aspie, the following things have helped: family counseling, anti-anxiety meds |
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trialanderror
Blue Jay
Joined: Jun 02, 2008
Age: 31
Posts: 83
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| Posted: Tue Jun 03, 2008 9:00 am Post subject: |
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| thanks. I don't get relief from anti anxiety meds. I am allergice to SSRI's and the "downers" cause my blood pressure to rise too much. Fun, eh? As for counseling, I have no money. I am trying to use resources to help my family the best I can. I figured something is better than nothing. I appreciate the support for continuing todirect her. THe kids all have their own rooms already. It was an absolute must. I just have a hard time when we go places with my little one. She is all over everywhere and I am trying so hard to keep control over the situation that I have noticed going overboard. I can't seem to quit "advising" even when she would enjoy experiencing the answer for herself. Even when there is no danger I do this. It seems to be the only area of OCD that I can't get a grip on. It falls out of my mouth bfore I realize I even said it. I need a technique to stop before it starts. These "techniques" work really well for both of us for the aspergers. Is there something for this? |
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ster
Phoenix
Joined: Sep 24, 2005
Posts: 2243
Location: new england
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| Posted: Wed Jun 04, 2008 8:21 am Post subject: |
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| you know there are mental health clinics ( at least around here) that take people on a sliding scale fee. |
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trialanderror
Blue Jay
Joined: Jun 02, 2008
Age: 31
Posts: 83
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| Posted: Wed Jun 04, 2008 1:16 pm Post subject: |
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| I'll check that out. Thanks |
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aspiewoman2
Tufted Titmouse
Joined: Jun 05, 2008
Posts: 47
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| Posted: Thu Jun 12, 2008 6:17 pm Post subject: HEY |
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HAVE YOU TRIED A TRANQUILIZER LIKE KLONOPIN? THAT HELPED CALM MY OCD.
_________________
The important thing is not to stop questioning. Curiosity has its own reason for existing. One cannot help but be in awe when he contemplates the mysteries of eternity, of life, of the marvelous structure of reality. Albert Einstein |
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trialanderror
Blue Jay
Joined: Jun 02, 2008
Age: 31
Posts: 83
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| Posted: Thu Jun 12, 2008 10:20 pm Post subject: |
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| Yeah, I know that I should not just dismiss meds all together, but they are just not the right choice for me. I am more uncomfortable taking them than not. The doc said that he can't tell if it may work because my body and mind is working so hard against it for it to do its job. I have had bad experiences. I amableto accomplish most anything if I can get a plan together. I have been workign really hard on paying attention to the difference between the kids safety and my discomfort. I am not doubting myself nearly as much because I am starting to separate the two. I will say that I am letting go, but only a little. I have noticed that the things that I have been so nervous about are legitimate and necessary. I let go a hair to test the waters and she went hog wild. I am not as bad or overprotective a parent as I thought. Thanks for writing |
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aspiewoman2
Tufted Titmouse
Joined: Jun 05, 2008
Posts: 47
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| Posted: Thu Jun 12, 2008 10:24 pm Post subject: by the way |
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i wasn't ylling, i just found out that's what all caps mean.
_________________
The important thing is not to stop questioning. Curiosity has its own reason for existing. One cannot help but be in awe when he contemplates the mysteries of eternity, of life, of the marvelous structure of reality. Albert Einstein |
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trialanderror
Blue Jay
Joined: Jun 02, 2008
Age: 31
Posts: 83
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| Posted: Thu Jun 12, 2008 10:36 pm Post subject: |
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| Giggle. I didn't even notice. |
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aspiewoman2
Tufted Titmouse
Joined: Jun 05, 2008
Posts: 47
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| Posted: Thu Jun 12, 2008 11:30 pm Post subject: response |
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good, because i had no idea.
_________________
The important thing is not to stop questioning. Curiosity has its own reason for existing. One cannot help but be in awe when he contemplates the mysteries of eternity, of life, of the marvelous structure of reality. Albert Einstein |
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