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Do you get accused of being "abrasive," especially
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WonderWoman
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PostPosted: Fri Jun 27, 2008 7:39 pm    Post subject: Do you get accused of being "abrasive," especially Reply with quote

when all you're doing is just trying to focus on the facts (like that they're an a******le for not saying it right in the first place), so you can get your job done. People don't like blunt. They want to have their feelings all coochy-cooed. It seems they want to slow you down to stop and say all the nicey, niceys, and the same time they want things to be done super fast. Well, which is it?

OK. So I admit it. It's partly me too. I'm a writer and I interview engineers for the info I write about. G*d! They can't express themselves. They talk about everything in the passive voice. And they talk about the things they're working on as if no one will use them. It's just the beauty of their dam* precious little baby, the machine! (Oops. Now isn't that sounding like I'm having no patience for my own landsmen? How'd that happen?) Well, I figured out that the "system," i.e., the "engineering" I'm into is language (dance too: people used to ask me "Why do you have to think about the pattern so much, can't you just feel it?), but the engineers are into their physical toys or their code. So I only recently realized their my people. Still, can't they use the system of language better! They have Aspergers already. They should be smart enough to use a system precisely! The relationship between me and them is all very ironic. Aspie against Aspie, just different flavors.

Anyway, I just wrote an email where I took out most of my "abrasive" statements and tried to play nicey, nicey. Let's see if I get what I need or if I have to stay overtime to encourage the light bulb to go off in their head and I can get my work done and leave. (I'll deny the following if anyone ever quotes it: But admittedly, I am sometimes just annoyed by the way they said it, because they didn't say it "logically," when deep down I really knew what they meant. They're just not obsessive-compulsive enough for me in their articulation.) And their Aspie little heads are probably going, "I already told you precisely how the machine/UI works. Who cares about what the person using it does? If they are smart enough and worth using my creation, they'll see what it needs as I do and they'll worship it. Smile

Had to vent after writing the nicey, nicey email.
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"Me voici donc seul sur la terre, n'ayant plus de frère de prochain d'ami de société que moi-même." Jean-Jacques Rousseau
"Do not think, 'I am alone.'" Sasaki Roshi
WonderWoman
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silly_rabbi
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PostPosted: Fri Jun 27, 2008 7:58 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I have the hardest time coming across right in email, I tend to wander and so I cut out half my email and it sounds really blunt. I like getting straight to the point, and sending out a five page email doesn't help me communicate what needs to be done to others, so my emails tend to be sticky note-like and brief. Then I get emails back asking me what I meant by such and such. My email was clear, people just have no idea how to read something and comprehend. Then I ask what the problem is, and why no one can understand simple English, and yes get yelled at for being "abrasive". It also lead to all my communication with the higher ups to go through my boss who could sugarcoat it. I don't do little chitchat in email, don't really get its purpose.
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There are only 10 types of people in this world: those who understand binary and those who don't.
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WonderWoman
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PostPosted: Fri Jun 27, 2008 8:30 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

silly_rabbi wrote:
There are only 10 types of people in this world: those who understand binary and those who don't.


I like your signature. It would be a good submission to the topic asking to describe Asperger's in one sentence.
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"Me voici donc seul sur la terre, n'ayant plus de frère de prochain d'ami de société que moi-même." Jean-Jacques Rousseau
"Do not think, 'I am alone.'" Sasaki Roshi
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spudnik
one year older, and not much wiser
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PostPosted: Fri Jun 27, 2008 8:37 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Only my whiskers, there are like a wire brush Smile
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silly_rabbi
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PostPosted: Fri Jun 27, 2008 8:49 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

WonderWoman wrote:
silly_rabbi wrote:
There are only 10 types of people in this world: those who understand binary and those who don't.


I like your signature. It would be a good submission to the topic asking to describe Asperger's in one sentence.


Yeah, I saw it on a tshirt and laughed my posterior off. I'm not really good at binary, but I thought it showed my geekiness very well. I maybe going back to school for my degree in something a lot techier than I thought I was, as I've been showing more interest/aptitude for programming/coding.
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