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rushfanatic
Velociraptor
Joined: Jan 11, 2006
Age: 43
Posts: 499
Location: Economically Drained Ohio
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 Posted: Mon Sep 08, 2008 8:54 am Post subject: Please Help Me Find The Words...... |
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| Greetings to all...I heard the most beautiful words from my oldest daughter yesterday, that she and her new hubby are expecting their first child...Then, about an hour later, my sister calls to tell me" that whatever issues I have with Dad, to let it go, as he has prostate cancer". I had a falling out with him afew months ago, after he did some selfish things regarding our children and how he overpowers us as parents, etc.... i want to write him a nice loving card, to tell him all is fine between us, but I do not know the right words...They are going to check to see if it has spread to his bones or lymph nodes, he is 64....Please give me advice, I am so stubborn in my convictions, but he fails to see my point of view altogether. For 41 years I have always bowed down to him, and I am not his little girl anymore, I make my own decisions regarding our children and my hubby.......Peace...Krista |
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intense
Deinonychus
Joined: Jul 10, 2008
Posts: 382
Location: UK
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| Posted: Mon Sep 08, 2008 11:47 am Post subject: |
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If it were me I would say that the way he acted recently hurt your feelings and briefly explain why, then tell him how you feel about him and the terrible situation with his health makes it imperative that you make up as soon as you can.
If he is a reasonable man and he loves you he will just want to make things right between you just as much as you do.
I wish you all the very best of luck, I know these situations are more complex than I’m aware of but the main thing is to try and put any arguments behind you and pull together as a family.
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Dasha
Blue Jay
Joined: Jan 09, 2008
Posts: 89
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| Posted: Mon Sep 08, 2008 5:51 pm Post subject: |
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of he was truly overpowering you, I wouldn't send him a card.
Just letting your children know that you won't fight in front the children, will be pleasantly polite at family functions, and will never try to instigate another family member against should be more than enough |
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LeKiwi
Phoenix
Joined: Nov 27, 2007
Posts: 2651
Location: The murky waters of my mind...
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| Posted: Mon Sep 08, 2008 7:05 pm Post subject: |
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| intense wrote: | If it were me I would say that the way he acted recently hurt your feelings and briefly explain why, then tell him how you feel about him and the terrible situation with his health makes it imperative that you make up as soon as you can.
If he is a reasonable man and he loves you he will just want to make things right between you just as much as you do.
I wish you all the very best of luck, I know these situations are more complex than I’m aware of but the main thing is to try and put any arguments behind you and pull together as a family. |
Agree completely. good luck!!
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rushfanatic
Velociraptor
Joined: Jan 11, 2006
Age: 43
Posts: 499
Location: Economically Drained Ohio
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| Posted: Wed Sep 10, 2008 7:16 am Post subject: please help me find the words.... |
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| intense wrote: | If it were me I would say that the way he acted recently hurt your feelings and briefly explain why, then tell him how you feel about him and the terrible situation with his health makes it imperative that you make up as soon as you can.
If he is a reasonable man and he loves you he will just want to make things right between you just as much as you do.
I wish you all the very best of luck, I know these situations are more complex than I’m aware of but the main thing is to try and put any arguments behind you and pull together as a family. |
Thank you so much for the wisdom here..He called yesterday, said"hello, stranger".. I asked him how it went at the dr's office, he said he was at work and did not want to discuss it at the moment.. I told him, "All is fine between us , Dad". He said" I don't know what happened that made us pull apart from each other", and I replied, "I just want you to respect our positions as parents, to let us know before you tell the kids you'll take them somewhere and not overpower us".... He understands , we both felt much better...... Thank you all again, you are all wonderful! |
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intense
Deinonychus
Joined: Jul 10, 2008
Posts: 382
Location: UK
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| Posted: Wed Sep 10, 2008 8:55 am Post subject: |
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 I'm so pleased to hear you worked it out, my best wishes to you and your dad.
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