Alexythmia
elderwanda
Veteran
Joined: 17 Nov 2008
Age: 56
Gender: Female
Posts: 1,534
Location: San Francisco Bay Area
Someone mentioned alexythmia in another thread recently. That's when you have trouble knowing what you are feeling, basically.
I found this test online. You have to count up your own score at the end, but it explains how to do it. I got a 127, which puts me in the "has alexythmia" category. Who knew? I'm in my imagination all day long, but apparently people without alexythmia imagine a wider variety of things. Yeah, I suppose I do kind of have the same basic fantasy going on all the time. What can I say?
Anyway, some of you might find this interesting.
BTW, at first it looks like there is something you have to purchase, but all you need to do is scroll down. Don't try to to the automated scoring test, because it doesn't work. At least it didn't for me.
Thanks for the link.
I scored 130.
Until quite recently I wasn't really aware that I was emotionally "different", but I saw a counsellor for about a year and one week he asked me to describe my feelings. I was surprised as I thought that was what I had been doing. He said that every time we started talking about how I felt about certain things I would intellectualise it.
I thought about it, and even bought a book about emotions. It was on special offer!
The following week I explained to him that it was as if he had revealed a road to me, the existence of which I had previously been unaware of. Now I knew that the road was there, but I couldn't get to it as there was a wall blocking the way. Does that make sense?
So now, I'm aware that there is this emotional road which others have access to and can travel along, but it's simply not available to me. I don't feel the lack of it - I've never walked down it and I am accepting of the fact that I never shall. But now I know it is there.
I'm not on the Spectrum, although I'd consider myself a "cousin". My son has been diagnosed with Asperger's. My own mother isn't a very emotional person, and people have said to me that she seems "cold" when I talk about her to them. I don't think of her as cold, it's just the way she is. Maybe that's the way I am too.
That site doesn't work, but, I am fairly sure I'm alexithymic. I tend to feel my emotions as a kind of abstract 'resonance', rather than I'm feeling X because Y said Z.'
I also have physical sensations without the emotion to go with them. I've often been in situations where I should be fearful, but don't feel actual fear, and wonder why I'm producing so much adrenaline.
_________________
'You're so cold, but you feel alive
Lay your hands on me, one last time' (Breaking Benjamin)
KarmicPyxis
Blue Jay
Joined: 27 Apr 2009
Age: 57
Gender: Male
Posts: 96
Location: A Very Remote Place In The Southern Hemisphere
I *wanted* to take the survey...but I'm too lazy/dumb to put up with trying to score it myself after several tries at doing so. I keep losing my place, getting confused between numbers I'm adding versus numbers I'm trying to skip because they are (idiotically!! !) scattered in amongst the other questions in terms of which direction the scoring scale goes, etc.
Anyhow...
I have no doubt that answering instinctively and with careful thought I would have to be in the alexythymic range for sure. It's just that I've trained pretty well over the years to "remember what people usually think/feel" in a given situation/circumstance versus what I (without training/effort, absolutely obliviously) am or would be feeling.
It's hard to explain. I'm not sure which I have a harder time with--empathy or sympathy. I know based on what other people tell me and my success in my professional life (ER doc) that people who get to know me believe that I am exceptionally empathetic...but...truth be told, I can abstractly demonstrate/communicate empathy but not actually "feel" a danged thing about it.
Odd. Worth further reflection....good topic, OP.
_________________
Not all who wander are lost...
Good link.
I got a 121, but I probably should have scored a little lower.
I think I leaned a little toward one kind of answer. I'm in a mood right now.
Hmm... I don't know the name of it. It's kind of related to "defiant" or "chip on my shoulder," but that's not exactly right.
I don't see the ability to think rationally in a panic situation as a deficiency.
I see it as a difference that would be beneficial to any tribe.
I have feelings. It's just that the logic kicks in first and I can, to an extent, control them rather than being controlled by them.
(Again, we are not a disease. We are the cure. Have I said that too much?)
I answered the questions but I don't have the patience to score that thing myself. Personally I thought some of the questions were rather dumb. I see myself as a very emotional person, I just don't always have strong feelings about the same things typical people do.
I remember being bored to tears at my own college graduation ceremony. I just wanted them to hand me my diploma and get out ASAP. To me the whole thing was a bunch of overwrought BS. I don't get much out of pageantry. I was supposed to feel this great sense of pride and accomplishment but I felt little of anything. I've felt much more personal emotional significance during long solitary hikes out in the wilderness.
Last edited by marshall on 25 May 2009, 11:09 pm, edited 1 time in total.
Umm... I scored 145. That doesn't seem right to me. I think I did it wrong because it seems abnormally high to me. Unless, I'm just really unaware of not being able to decipher my emotions which could be the case because I tend to ignore them. Alrighty then, learned something new about myself.
There's a word for that. A SciFi thing about galaxies passing through each other with no impact... something about a different frequency... DS9 had a couple of episodes with that theme.
I don't feel (ha, ha) taking the test.
But I know I sometimes take a long time to know how I feel about things. The emotions take a long time to proccess, and I often base my anger etc. based on social rules and not on how I feel about the event (or what it might be.)
This has, I believe, saved me from being more damaged by my upbringing. Everything got it's good parts
Fiz
Veteran
Joined: 29 Jan 2006
Age: 41
Gender: Female
Posts: 1,821
Location: Manchester, United Kingdom
I knew that there were people out there who had trouble knowing what they were feeling, but I didn't know it was called alexithymia. Now I do! The only part of this that I can definitely say I have is not being able to describe my feelings to others, otherwise, I don't think it applies to me that much.
I feel I am also like this. Like when you get a group of women, for example, who like the same style of shoe and then, when one of their friends get a pair, they scream about it. I don't get that. I just shrug my shoulders. I also have very strong feelings about things, but I just don't necessarily feel the need to share them with other people. This really annoys some of my friends and family as their reaction when they find out is like 'why didn't you tell me?' I don't get that either, it should be my right to share or withold information about me and my life, surely?
_________________
The only person in the world that can truly make you happy is yourself.