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DW_a_mom
Phoenix
Joined: Feb 23, 2008
Posts: 1045
Location: Northern California
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 Posted: Thu Mar 27, 2008 5:24 pm Post subject: |
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| equinn wrote: | Why even bring it up? Why say "he's doing the autistic thing right now? I don't think I'd ever say this. People wouldn't understand and feel it's an excuse.
If it's apparent the child is autistic, the parent wouldn't say anything, right? There's a silent understanding. If it's subtle, and the other person doesn't understand spectrum behaviors, too bad. When you open the floor, label how he's acting, then you're allowing for discussion about the autiism.
If your child were gay and hugging his/her partner in front of a neighbor, then you wouldn't say "Oh, she's just doing her gay thing."
Just accept it for what it is--If you accept it, then others will either not accept it silently, or accept it silently. No discussion is necessary.
Also, I don't always identify my son's behaviors as NT or autistic. Again, it is what it is.
equinn |
Good points.
If I recall, in this situation it was preceded by a comment from the other person, "are you planning to simply allow him to act like that?" Um, yes, I was, lol. And that was my explanation, rightly or wrongly.
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DW_a_mom
Phoenix
Joined: Feb 23, 2008
Posts: 1045
Location: Northern California
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| Posted: Thu Mar 27, 2008 5:28 pm Post subject: |
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| equinn wrote: | But--just imagine--what if it truly didn't exist? Many people were successful because they forced themselves to compensate--think about it?
I say this, but at the same time, my own son was abominable in kindergarten and I didn't understand! Finally, in grade 3, he's settling into life--stilll he says inapproriate things that make you say--huh? He has other quirkyish friends, which is just fine.
Thank goodness for Asperges/HFA. Those underlying quirky things are important to understand. I see the world of labels in a new light.
equinn |
For me, it comes down to whether or not my child will be able to compensate AND be happy. My father carried such a wagon load of resentments all the way through to the end of his life, that I am sure were developed because he had spent his entire childhood in conflict with a world he found unreasonable. Sure, he lived a successful life, in the end. But he was never happy. I hope for something better for my son, that's all.
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Cameo
Velociraptor
Joined: Sep 04, 2007
Age: 23
Posts: 497
Location: SE Wisconsin
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| Posted: Fri Mar 28, 2008 11:20 pm Post subject: |
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How frustrating... everyone's an expert these days, eh? And you gotta love people who will believe the first thing they hear, and stick to it, no matter what anyone else says later.
My aunt told me I can't possibly have AS because I have emotions. Apparently her friend told her that her autistic children have no emotions and pay no mind to other people whatsoever.
So apparently all autistics are robots, and I don't have AS. Whatever  |
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