Anyone literally never leave the house?

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ooOoOoOAnaOoOoOoo
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15 Dec 2009, 11:14 pm

I often wish I had a huge house with lots of rooms that I never had to leave. I could just send someone out to do stuff for me. If there is such a thing as past lives (which I doubt), I must have been a rich recluse who had servants who did everything for me because that's so much how I want to live my life now. I lean toward that inclination. Stay in and have others do stuff for me, not that they want to, but, very reluctantly. I wish I could hand someone a list and have them do everything on it, go to the grocery store, call around and get someone when something needs repaired, answer calls, go to appointments as my representative.
I could spend all my time in my house with many rooms, decorating it and everything.



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16 Dec 2009, 2:43 am

Tollorin wrote:
Except for obligations like buying foods I rarely get out of my home. There's a huge world ou there, but this world suck. I'm much more comfortable in my home.


I agree, and the same thing goes for how all my life everyone has stressed how I'm in my own world (more as a kid than now though), but I just think that actually, I like my world, it's nice, whereas the real world is just crap...



therange
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16 Dec 2009, 3:14 am

I'm on disability. I'm incapable of working 99% of jobs due to lack of focus, constant drowsiness from the pills I'm on for suicidal depression, and overall lack of talent or intelligence in any job field. The few jobs I've had that weren't an overload, I freaked out because I was being made fun of by co-workers or bosses.

I tried going to college and after the first couple weeks couldn't handle the workload despite only taking 3 classes as opposed to the usual 5.

On top of that, I don't really like going out and am in general a misanthrope other than loving my family and having a taste for beautiful women.

My dad works and pays the bills and both my parents take care of groceries and everything.

I"m surprised most Aspies aren't like this. I hear a lot of people with 40 hour jobs and going to college or grad school. For me, Aspergers and depression takes over my life, and in a way, like some people have said, I hope my parents live a long life so I can live the no money or stress life.



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16 Dec 2009, 9:35 pm

I am anything but reclusive.


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ssenkrad
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17 Dec 2009, 1:57 am

therange wrote:
I"m surprised most Aspies aren't like this. I hear a lot of people with 40 hour jobs and going to college or grad school. For me, Aspergers and depression takes over my life, and in a way, like some people have said, I hope my parents live a long life so I can live the no money or stress life.


I understand that.. but the plain truth is, they won't outlast you. Not trying to scare you, but you've got to plan for the future.



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17 Dec 2009, 10:39 am

ssenkrad wrote:
therange wrote:
I"m surprised most Aspies aren't like this. I hear a lot of people with 40 hour jobs and going to college or grad school. For me, Aspergers and depression takes over my life, and in a way, like some people have said, I hope my parents live a long life so I can live the no money or stress life.


I understand that.. but the plain truth is, they won't outlast you. Not trying to scare you, but you've got to plan for the future.


Currently I'm in a similar situation with familiar living. Though, I do not find comfort in it. It makes me feel like a burden and a caged bird who is shushed whenever she tries to sing. While I am greatful to my parents for their continued support and perseverance through my issues it is not something that should affect their lives as much as it affects mine. It is my cross to bear and I need to find a way to venture out and carry it on my own. This way our bond can be shared familiar and co-operative rather than forced and circumstantial. Also this can alleviate their worries about my future when that inevitable day arrives. I hope my parents live a long life because I love them and I want them to be able to live and enjoy it without having to worry about me.


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17 Dec 2009, 6:43 pm

Ha ha! No way! I need friends in my life. I couldn't live without them! I actually live in a dorm on my high school campus. It's a lot of fun! I also do a lot of theater. Socializing for me is really important. :lol:



therange
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18 Dec 2009, 2:22 am

E-Wreck wrote:
Ha ha! No way! I need friends in my life. I couldn't live without them! I actually live in a dorm on my high school campus. It's a lot of fun! I also do a lot of theater. Socializing for me is really important. :lol:


I never understood my extroverted acquiantences who really would slit their wrists if they were without their cellphone for a week, let alone any group of friends.

I don't mind conversing with people in public or making acquiaintences, but I don't need or desire a group of friends.



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19 Dec 2009, 1:22 am

nansnick wrote:
Currently I'm in a similar situation with familiar living. Though, I do not find comfort in it. It makes me feel like a burden and a caged bird who is shushed whenever she tries to sing. While I am greatful to my parents for their continued support and perseverance through my issues it is not something that should affect their lives as much as it affects mine. It is my cross to bear and I need to find a way to venture out and carry it on my own. This way our bond can be shared familiar and co-operative rather than forced and circumstantial. Also this can alleviate their worries about my future when that inevitable day arrives. I hope my parents live a long life because I love them and I want them to be able to live and enjoy it without having to worry about me.


I like your attitude. It shows that you want to become completely independent. And where there's a will, there's a way. People who are completely content mooching off their parents and show no interest in bettering themselves or their own financial situation are the ones that tend to annoy me.



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19 Dec 2009, 2:07 am

ssenkrad wrote:
nansnick wrote:
Currently I'm in a similar situation with familiar living. Though, I do not find comfort in it. It makes me feel like a burden and a caged bird who is shushed whenever she tries to sing. While I am greatful to my parents for their continued support and perseverance through my issues it is not something that should affect their lives as much as it affects mine. It is my cross to bear and I need to find a way to venture out and carry it on my own. This way our bond can be shared familiar and co-operative rather than forced and circumstantial. Also this can alleviate their worries about my future when that inevitable day arrives. I hope my parents live a long life because I love them and I want them to be able to live and enjoy it without having to worry about me.


I like your attitude. It shows that you want to become completely independent. And where there's a will, there's a way. People who are completely content mooching off their parents and show no interest in bettering themselves or their own financial situation are the ones that tend to annoy me.


Personally, I don't have a choice. I barely function around the house. It's not like I'm having a party. I almost wish I had something visibly wrong with me so people could say "He's the guy in the wheelchair" instead of "He's the weird guy that has no social or functioning skills yet isn't completely mentally ret*d, just autistic."

I'd argue also that if my parents and my brother weren't alive, I'd have to reason to live at all. They've shown me what real love is like and having people you can talk to and who will be there in the good and bad times. They got frustrated in my dark days, but they are happy that the worst is over and now even though I'm incompetent, we can have a healthy talking relationship.



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19 Dec 2009, 5:02 am

I often don't leave the house. It's too stressful if I'm having a bad day.



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19 Dec 2009, 12:01 pm

therange wrote:
ssenkrad wrote:
nansnick wrote:
Currently I'm in a similar situation with familiar living. Though, I do not find comfort in it. It makes me feel like a burden and a caged bird who is shushed whenever she tries to sing. While I am greatful to my parents for their continued support and perseverance through my issues it is not something that should affect their lives as much as it affects mine. It is my cross to bear and I need to find a way to venture out and carry it on my own. This way our bond can be shared familiar and co-operative rather than forced and circumstantial. Also this can alleviate their worries about my future when that inevitable day arrives. I hope my parents live a long life because I love them and I want them to be able to live and enjoy it without having to worry about me.


I like your attitude. It shows that you want to become completely independent. And where there's a will, there's a way. People who are completely content mooching off their parents and show no interest in bettering themselves or their own financial situation are the ones that tend to annoy me.


I'd argue also that if my parents and my brother weren't alive, I'd have to reason to live at all. They've shown me what real love is like and having people you can talk to and who will be there in the good and bad times. They got frustrated in my dark days, but they are happy that the worst is over and now even though I'm incompetent, we can have a healthy talking relationship.


Thats another thing that's frustrating. I have lived on my own before and tend to get side tracked very easy and lonely fast, even with having friends over for company or going out all the time. As much as I don't function well with others there is something in familiar living that might be essential to my ability to function successfully.


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19 Dec 2009, 8:22 pm

This thread reminds me of the hikikomori phenomenon in Japan, where thousands of teenage boys literally refuse to leave their rooms for months.

Personally, I don't think I could go more than a few days without fresh air.



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20 Dec 2009, 3:57 pm

i have to go to school. apart from that, my free time is probably spent 95% in my house. i dont like leaving. i never go anywhere with my parents....i do occasionally go out to meet my friends.



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21 Dec 2009, 2:27 am

I literally only leave to buy food from the shop. I met with a friend once earlier this year, and tried to make an appointment to do it again, but cancelled ahead of time. I used to get groceries delivered but now choose to go out to get them as a way of practising being around people. I'm a bit indifferent about it, so it's okay. If visitors come to the house I rarely come out of my room to greet them. And if I do I don't hang around to chat because that would be like torturing myself - it only interests me occasionally. I'm from a big family but am only bothered to talk to the people that I live with.

I understand your predicament therange. My dad died a couple of years ago so now I only have one more parent left. If my mum dies before me I don't know if I'll be out on the street then or what's going to happen. I get disability support so I'm not financially dependent on my family - but on society, yes. My family have endured some very dark times because of my difficult mental states and I'm very grateful to them for putting up with it. I was always terrified of not having the security of my family home, but now strangely feel more at ease with the prospect of having nowhere to go. I'm barely functional and have no idea if I'd survive, but at least I'm not terrified anymore. I could even be venturing over into the 'optimistic' side! The facts of the situation are probably too grim for me to face up to, and it makes me happier to think of it all as a 'big adventure'. Even though I know I'm kidding myself. However, there is hope, even if it's minuscule.


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21 May 2010, 2:06 pm

I am in the same boat. I am a 27 year old male. I live with my parents and I have only left the house a handful times in the last year. That was only to go to the liquor store. I avoid ANY human contact. I time my sleep schedule so I am awake when my parents are asleep and vice-versa. I have severe social anxiety and cannot be around others. I want to be suicidal, but have not reached that point, so I do other things to shorten my lifespan. I drink heavily, I barely move ( my feet are constantly cold and have no feeling in my feet) and I started eating unhealthy foods. Anything I can do to shorten my life. I was diagnosed with aspie as a child, but still believe that it was misdiagnosed. The doctor I saw over a year ago said I have severe social anxiety. I used to have a job that paid over 50k (US) a year. I had a girlfriend and friends. I had a 1650 square foot apartment in midtown Kansas City, MO. I had a decent life. I had to give all of that up because of social anxiety.


To the original poster: life sucks for some people. I will not sit here and blow smoke up your ass. I will not talk you out of suicide, should your mind ever reach that point. We will all die someday. Why go through life in pain? Medications don't always work. Therapy doesn't always work. I really hope you find some way to cope, even if that means suicide. I am in the same boat. If my parents were to die, I would be in prison or out on the street. Both of my siblings are successful and live out of the country and I would rather live in prison before I asked them for help. Life is only pleasant for those with healthy to semi-healthy minds. The World will try to convince you that YOU are responsible for your mentality. Just another reason to slump into seclusion. The majority trying to teach the minority. The majority will never understand.