nick007
old-skewl fan-boy
Joined: May 05, 2010
Age: 30
Posts: 9806
Location: was Louisiana but moved in with my girlfreind in Vermont
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Matt62
Phoenix
Joined: Jan 05, 2012
Age: 51
Posts: 1178
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 Posted: Fri Feb 17, 2012 10:48 pm Post subject: |
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I was bullied all through school. Even some in college.
I found the one way to really get back at them & under their skin (but didn't practice it much until college)was..
IGNORE them. Easy for an ASD person! LOL Nothing makes a bully hurt more than being TOTALLY ignored.
As for richer, popular, stronger men? Well, that's a fact of life. If you obsess over that, you will not acchieve much in your own life.
Focus on what you are strong at.
And by the way, it sounds like the girls you are interested in are not very mature. Forget them. Wait until they get a little older. I did & I got dates with some very beautiful ladies ( three anyway). Mature women will look past appearences. However, if you are bitter & angry all the time, you will drive them away (yes this is IME).
Just saying..
Matt |
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justalouise
Velociraptor
Joined: Jan 21, 2012
Posts: 433
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| Posted: Fri Feb 17, 2012 11:23 pm Post subject: |
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| Tom5 wrote: | | Buff, handsome and rich men have something to back up their confidence, while men who do not have these attractive qualities do not. |
That is bull. |
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Boxman108
"Oh...it's just a box."
Joined: Jan 03, 2012
Age: 21
Posts: 1399
Location: NH
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| Posted: Sat Feb 18, 2012 12:07 am Post subject: |
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In my experience, trying to act confident when you don't actually have anything to be confident about only makes you look like a cocky prick. I don't know about anyone else, but I wouldn't find that attractive at all. There's much more to be said for being humble(not necessarily pessimistic).
_________________
About suffering they were never wrong,
The Old Masters: how well they understood
Its human position; how it takes place
While someone else is eating or opening a window or
just walking dully along... |
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tronist
Deinonychus
Joined: Oct 23, 2011
Posts: 308
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| Posted: Sat Feb 18, 2012 12:08 am Post subject: |
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| MR20 wrote: | | Dilbert wrote: | | Tom5 wrote: | | ManicMinx wrote: | | One thing that took me a long time to learn is that you can be very good looking and have many good qualities, but if you don't have confidence you don't attract the opposite sex as easily as other people. |
That's a myth. I never really believed that.
Buff, handsome and rich men have something to back up their confidence, while men who do not have these attractive qualities do not. Off course you can always fake confidence but this doesn't work out in the end because women can smell fake confidence from a mile away. |
It's not a myth. Low confidence is a social killer. Love yourself and have confidence in yourself and everything else, socially speaking, will just kind of fall into place. |
Again with this "confidence" BS. It's just a way how selfish and arrogant people justify treating people the way they do. BTW, f***ing changing yourself to be "social" (I hate that f***ing word) You shouldn't have to change yourself just so people will hang out/talk to you.
It's one of the main reasons I like being alone. |
its good advice MR20. being confident is like 96% of the 'battle'. if you arent confident, you've already lost the vast majority of girls who would have otherwise maybe given you a shot. personally, im going to suck it up and pretend im more confident than i actually am. im pretty confident to begin with, when it comes to girls, but you cant leave any room for unconfidence at all, or it will show. |
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hale_bopp
All Kinds of Freak
Joined: Nov 03, 2004
Age: 28
Posts: 14841
Location: New Zealand
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| Posted: Sat Feb 18, 2012 12:59 am Post subject: |
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| Boxman108 wrote: | | In my experience, trying to act confident when you don't actually have anything to be confident about only makes you look like a cocky prick. I don't know about anyone else, but I wouldn't find that attractive at all. There's much more to be said for being humble(not necessarily pessimistic). |
That's why you actually get confident, not put on an act.
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Boxman108
"Oh...it's just a box."
Joined: Jan 03, 2012
Age: 21
Posts: 1399
Location: NH
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| Posted: Sat Feb 18, 2012 1:18 am Post subject: |
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| hale_bopp wrote: | | Boxman108 wrote: | | In my experience, trying to act confident when you don't actually have anything to be confident about only makes you look like a cocky prick. I don't know about anyone else, but I wouldn't find that attractive at all. There's much more to be said for being humble(not necessarily pessimistic). |
That's why you actually get confident, not put on an act. |
Thing is, no amount of confidence, act or not, is going to change whether someone is actually attractive or desirable. It would be the equivalent of someone bragging about this job or car or money they don't really have.
_________________
About suffering they were never wrong,
The Old Masters: how well they understood
Its human position; how it takes place
While someone else is eating or opening a window or
just walking dully along... |
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hyperlexian
loves the man who typed too much and ran outta spa
Joined: Jul 22, 2010
Age: 41
Posts: 21990
Location: with bucephalus
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| Posted: Sat Feb 18, 2012 1:20 am Post subject: |
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| Boxman108 wrote: | | hale_bopp wrote: | | Boxman108 wrote: | | In my experience, trying to act confident when you don't actually have anything to be confident about only makes you look like a cocky prick. I don't know about anyone else, but I wouldn't find that attractive at all. There's much more to be said for being humble(not necessarily pessimistic). |
That's why you actually get confident, not put on an act. |
Thing is, no amount of confidence, act or not, is going to change whether someone is actually attractive or desirable. It would be the equivalent of someone bragging about this job or car or money they don't really have. |
i beg to differ:
http://ravivora.com/blog/ugly-actors-you-know-and-love
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CrinklyCrustacean
Phoenix
Joined: Mar 23, 2009
Posts: 1223
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| Posted: Sat Feb 18, 2012 2:47 am Post subject: |
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| hyperlexian wrote: | | Boxman108 wrote: | | hale_bopp wrote: | | Boxman108 wrote: | | In my experience, trying to act confident when you don't actually have anything to be confident about only makes you look like a cocky prick. I don't know about anyone else, but I wouldn't find that attractive at all. There's much more to be said for being humble(not necessarily pessimistic). |
That's why you actually get confident, not put on an act. |
Thing is, no amount of confidence, act or not, is going to change whether someone is actually attractive or desirable. It would be the equivalent of someone bragging about this job or car or money they don't really have. |
i beg to differ:
http://ravivora.com/blog/ugly-actors-you-know-and-love |
Just an observation, but all of the photos in that article were taken when the people were older. By the time they looked like that, they had already acquired a successful career because when they were younger they were prettier. If they had started their careers like that, well, would any of the Hollywood "big cheeses" have hired them? For example, here is a picture of Helena Bonham-Carter when she was younger:
Now compare with the photo in the article, when she is older:
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hale_bopp
All Kinds of Freak
Joined: Nov 03, 2004
Age: 28
Posts: 14841
Location: New Zealand
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| Posted: Sat Feb 18, 2012 6:48 am Post subject: |
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| Boxman108 wrote: | | hale_bopp wrote: | | Boxman108 wrote: | | In my experience, trying to act confident when you don't actually have anything to be confident about only makes you look like a cocky prick. I don't know about anyone else, but I wouldn't find that attractive at all. There's much more to be said for being humble(not necessarily pessimistic). |
That's why you actually get confident, not put on an act. |
Thing is, no amount of confidence, act or not, is going to change whether someone is actually attractive or desirable. |
Um... yes it does.
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www.aspergersgirl.com |
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MXH
TomCat
Joined: Jul 29, 2010
Age: 22
Posts: 12694
Location: Here i stand and face the rain
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| Posted: Sat Feb 18, 2012 7:35 am Post subject: |
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| hyperlexian wrote: | | Boxman108 wrote: | | hale_bopp wrote: | | Boxman108 wrote: | | In my experience, trying to act confident when you don't actually have anything to be confident about only makes you look like a cocky prick. I don't know about anyone else, but I wouldn't find that attractive at all. There's much more to be said for being humble(not necessarily pessimistic). |
That's why you actually get confident, not put on an act. |
Thing is, no amount of confidence, act or not, is going to change whether someone is actually attractive or desirable. It would be the equivalent of someone bragging about this job or car or money they don't really have. |
i beg to differ:
http://ravivora.com/blog/ugly-actors-you-know-and-love |
And i beg to differ yet again. Most of those that i recognize have done commedy/supporting/badguy roles. Those arent the ones people fall head over heels for. |
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MXH
TomCat
Joined: Jul 29, 2010
Age: 22
Posts: 12694
Location: Here i stand and face the rain
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| Posted: Sat Feb 18, 2012 7:37 am Post subject: |
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| hale_bopp wrote: | | Boxman108 wrote: | | In my experience, trying to act confident when you don't actually have anything to be confident about only makes you look like a cocky prick. I don't know about anyone else, but I wouldn't find that attractive at all. There's much more to be said for being humble(not necessarily pessimistic). |
That's why you actually get confident, not put on an act. |
Confidence isnt something you buy in the drug store. You cant just say "ill be confident" and actually be it. You need to have the external aspect to support your claims of confidence otherwise youre just pretending to be confident. |
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Uprising
Phoenix
Joined: Jan 10, 2012
Posts: 2942
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| Posted: Sat Feb 18, 2012 8:03 am Post subject: |
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| If you don't have any qualities to back up your confidence, then people will loathe you. It's just a battle for the strongest. Your confidence should be even with the qualities you have. Personally I don't like the idea I'm writing myself either but this is how most people see it. If you don't have anything that appeals to other people than just focus on attracting people that are in the same position of yours, if you can find them. But in the end it's all on the inside of a person, some people that have all the qualities will love people with lower qualities, it's just how they think about it that matters, but you'll discover that these people would be rather rare. If you're not having anything to brag about, then I think you shouldn't be spending energy in socializing, because the disappointments will bring you more down than your own loneliness will do over time. It's a really negative view on it, but it's the truth I think. |
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Daniella
Deinonychus
Joined: Jun 10, 2009
Age: 22
Posts: 317
Location: Netherlands
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| Posted: Sat Feb 18, 2012 8:39 am Post subject: Re: I 'm so angry |
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| 1814 wrote: | | Do you have any tips that can help a guy like me hook up with a hot girl? |
You do realise you're now excluding all the nice girls?
Good luck to you.
_________________
Common sense is the collection of prejudices acquired by age eighteen. |
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hyperlexian
loves the man who typed too much and ran outta spa
Joined: Jul 22, 2010
Age: 41
Posts: 21990
Location: with bucephalus
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| Posted: Sat Feb 18, 2012 1:28 pm Post subject: |
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| CrinklyCrustacean wrote: | | hyperlexian wrote: | | Boxman108 wrote: | | hale_bopp wrote: | | Boxman108 wrote: | | In my experience, trying to act confident when you don't actually have anything to be confident about only makes you look like a cocky prick. I don't know about anyone else, but I wouldn't find that attractive at all. There's much more to be said for being humble(not necessarily pessimistic). |
That's why you actually get confident, not put on an act. |
Thing is, no amount of confidence, act or not, is going to change whether someone is actually attractive or desirable. It would be the equivalent of someone bragging about this job or car or money they don't really have. |
i beg to differ:
http://ravivora.com/blog/ugly-actors-you-know-and-love |
Just an observation, but all of the photos in that article were taken when the people were older. By the time they looked like that, they had already acquired a successful career because when they were younger they were prettier. If they had started their careers like that, well, would any of the Hollywood "big cheeses" have hired them? For example, here is a picture of Helena Bonham-Carter when she was younger:
[img]http://michaelmay.us/temp/0601_helena_bonham_carter.jpg[/img
Now compare with the photo in the article, when she is older:
[img]http://ravivora.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2007/10/helena_bonham_carter.jpg[/img |
the women in the article are not really applicable, as women are pretty much required to be beautiful in Hollywood. but if you look at the men when they were younger they were still not "attractive" by Hollywood standards when they started their careers.
Vincent Schiavelli:
Steve Buscemi:
these guys are pretty confident....
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