I am afraid of using Facebook! (Few friends)

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namaste
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12 Sep 2012, 5:23 am

[quote="autismthinker21"
Explain this one then? :?[/quote]
deleted that one got frustrated with it hell with diplomacy


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SoftKitty
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17 Dec 2012, 3:01 pm

You don´t have to be afraid of Facebook, if you learn how to use it in a way that it would actually serve you, not harm you. It is a perfect place for Aspies created by the alleged Aspie. You don´t have to interact with flash-and-bones people there, you just post your thoughts there and answer your friends questions. There, you are all equal because you ALL have to guess what the other person is thinking. It´s not just the AS (for once) :wink:

The only problem with Facebook is that they store everything you have ever written or posted there (datas, photos, other stuff). If you post something overly radical there, like some quotes about wanting to kill somebody or things like that, it could be used against you in the future. It´s the same with Twitter.

There was this story about a girl that jokingly wrote on her FB wall that she plans a bomb attack in the US. Then she really flew to America, but was detained at the US borders and subsequently sent back where she came from, because the government had the access to her FB or Twitter account, and they flashed her own (printed) comments at her. So be careful about that.

Also never ever post some naked or otherwise controversial photos of yourself or your family members. It is the same case.

You know, it is the same with fire - Facebook is a good servant but a bad master. But if you know how to use it, it can be to a benefit for you.

You can find new friends there, and FB also sends you friend suggestions based on the details you wrote about yourself, so you could meet same-minded people. I would not be overly afraid of it, if I were you. It can help people like us. And then, who knows? You could meet some of the people you met online in the real life as well! Many great friendships or even relationships started like this.


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zeroed
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19 Dec 2012, 11:15 pm

Good advice, and there are other social media platforms that can have similar margins of safety. In my case the axiom "achievement is really the combination of preparation and opportunity" was an influence So when I was quite ill I said yes to some very unexpected and significant opportunities. I took the risk of doing these things when i was recovering from illness. They did not cause massive harm but getting my computer hacked did. Many negative disruptive messages and posts were made at that time. Several people unfriended me on Linkedin after that, but stayed on Facebook connection to my fb account. One person offered me an opportunity and another an interview, yet they all reacted with avoidance after the fb hacking incident. So, those that did that were possibly hurt and that bothers me and therefore i am very cautious. I might even unfriend the people in question because maybe they interpret our connection as negative.. Yet it is nearly impossible to completely retract a posting.



fuzzylights
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20 Dec 2012, 12:03 am

HisDivineMajesty wrote:
Usually, a person's number of contacts on Facebook leads me to believe the opposite of what they want me to believe.
When someone has ten Facebook friends, five of which are family members that's fine. When someone has thirty, that's fine. Sixty is fine, too, but anything over that will lead me wondering what their standards for adding are. Usually, people with such amounts of friends just go over other people's profiles and select people they vaguely remember from classes years ago or something similar.

If someone has hundreds of friends, it's safe to assume they haven't personally met the large majority. These are usually people who play games like FarmVille or Mafia Wars, and need 'friends' to send them upgrades for those games. Some of those people might get into contact with them and become friends, but occasionally, they don't even speak any mutual languages. I know a guy who added tons of Turkish and Asian friends to give him upgrades in Mafia Wars.

Personally, my Facebook is a dreadful mess. I've generally accepted requests from anyone I have ever met, including a previous and more anonymous account created by myself that I used for a hobby before I got into it well, and some people I only know of through some hobbies of mine. I've sent requests to very few people. My profile picture is three years old and shows me wearing some basic militaria and sunglasses, Gaddafi-style. I've added some personal information in the most dry and semantic sense of the word.

But, all things considered, I respect people with fewer and more genuine Facebook friends more than those who flaunt their friendship amount above the quality of those contacts.


I disagree! I have just over 300 and I personally know all of them. I don't keep in touch with most or even consider them friends in real life. I have been to 6 different schools, so I've met quite a few people!



Appleisbetter
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22 Dec 2012, 7:58 am

I was one of the first people on bookface and also one of the first to leave . Evil evil evil. No good can come of this mark my words.



RaveMaster
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26 Dec 2012, 11:55 pm

bro i usually wouldn't advise this but the more friends you have on face book that are college professors the more help and friends you can get.



Guilliman
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27 Dec 2012, 8:27 am

I like facebook, it's social interaction from the comfort of my home. I don't have to be outside in loud noisy places full of strangers. + it helps with networking for the future. I don't have a lot of people on it, just 32 with 7 being my family. I rather keep a small amount of people that genuinely care about me and are nice than 300 people of which 250 are jerks.

I think without facebook I'd end up in a spiralling depression of loneliness of which I wouldn't want to escape. I'm not made to live alone, I cant, I crave human contact/interaction. So facebook allows me to do it in safety and at my own pace.



BeauZa
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27 Dec 2012, 9:17 am

I quit Facebook because it took up way too much of my time, and I felt like I just annoyed people with my questions.

Have as many or as few friends as you like! The trick is to train yourself not to care how others perceive you.


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chessimprov
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27 Dec 2012, 11:35 pm

You could also consider a fake account. I wouldn't use it for dating purposes, but if you just want to be around random people, or don't want to use your real name, you can do things that way if you still want an account, but none of your (real) personal information. You're "friends" on facebook should know it's you if they're truly friends at all because you would've felt comfortable enough telling them about your account. Don't worry about how many friends you or someone else has. It really doesn't matter as long as you enjoy using the applications on it or communicating with the friends you do have. I have "127" "friends" right now and I keep thinking of reducing mine. I think if I had as few as 5, I might personally just not want to use it at all or for the free apps only.



r84shi37
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28 Dec 2012, 1:40 am

Close your Facebook account, or just stop logging in as much. I log onto mine perhaps once a week just in case there's a family emergency or something that I wouldn't have found out about otherwise. Other than that, I don't post anything, I rarely comment, and rarely "like". Facebook used to depress me, but then I thought to myself, "You are looking at the products of some of the stupidest minds in the world; why would you do that?" (Most of my friends are my age... self explanatory). Then, I stopped caring about the number of "likes" someone got, or how someone responds to my comments- I just stopped commenting, and stopped caring. Life improvement overall. :D I have around 70 friends, so lots of crap in the news feed... I almost feel sorry for the people with 1000+ friends, it probably kills their brain cells. People who rate people based on how many friends they have really need to get a reality check, or a brain transplant. Frankly, I don't care at all about what people think of me having 70 friends (an unmoving number)- if they want to evaluate me on how many "friends" I have on a website, then I don't give a crap about their opinion of me.

EDIT: I just checked, evidently I have 85 friends. Just never really looked tbh :P


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Luska
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28 Dec 2012, 1:07 pm

New replies??? :lol:

I don't really give a d@mn about Facebook. I don't use it.


I just HATE it when people press me for it. There's stigma against people who do not use FB. And, yes, it seems employers use FB to "screen" potential employees. :roll:

There are even some studies that link people who don't use that site with mass muderers and psycopaths: (Adam Lanza, Anders Brehvik, James Holmes all did not use Facebook.)

http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/uni ... e-facebook
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article ... cious.html


:roll:



CyclopsSummers
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28 Dec 2012, 3:43 pm

Luska wrote:
New replies??? :lol:

I don't really give a d@mn about Facebook. I don't use it.


I just HATE it when people press me for it. There's stigma against people who do not use FB. And, yes, it seems employers use FB to "screen" potential employees. :roll:

There are even some studies that link people who don't use that site with mass muderers and psycopaths: (Adam Lanza, Anders Brehvik, James Holmes all did not use Facebook.)

http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/uni ... e-facebook
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article ... cious.html


:roll:


Wowwwwwww.... That's just nasty. I knew about the employer thing, but this... Ugh... just.. no. No.


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rapidroy
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30 Dec 2012, 2:27 pm

I have been on FB for 3 mounths now I have 11 friends, 1/2 I don't know personally, just people who attend and race at the same track I do and they tend to friend everybody. I use FB to keep in touch with friends who live outside my area. I have looked up my former classmates, won't friend them unless they friend me first, it can be depressing to see were some of them are in life however it can feel good that I have not squndered my life like some have, its amazing how meny are wasteing their money, have dead end jobs too, extending their credit and the teen pregnancys I think I have counted up to 4 of those just from elementry school. as for why I only have 11 friends I just say I don't have that kind of time to use it.



riley
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29 Jun 2013, 11:36 am

I used to LOVE the WP group but the admin is now banning subjects and threatening to ban people if they break HIS rules (opposed to Alex's) and is getting a major power kick. He is also a gun enthusiast which, given some of the stigma that has resulted from shootings connected with AS, and given the unfortunate history of WP is a very bad idea to have as a WP mouthpiece. He also seems to have a problem with women.

So now I am posting here again. Cyber refugee. :cry:



Haruhi_79
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08 Apr 2015, 5:05 pm

Don't be afraid of having too few friends. When I see a person with 60 or fewer Facebook friends, I think wow, this person is selective and I'm honored to be on their friends list because it is meaningful. People with 300 plus friends don't impress me. They obviously are friending anyone they know slightly or friends of friends. These people wish you happy birthday only because Facebook reminded them to.

I was on Facebook for a few years, and deactivated it because people post idiotic things and get into pointless arguments. I like people better when I don't see their status updates about how their family pisses them off or what they ate last night.